How to Polish a Turd

How to Polish a Turd

by Joe Dawson


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How to Polish a Turd by Joe Dawson

Miserable sod Rodney jumped to his death, only to find that God is a giant pair of testicles who needs him to save the world. In an unconventional tale that includes hipsters, adverts, killer sperm, twitter, the mysterious man in duck egg blue, and a bizarre side story about a gorilla who loses his underpants, can Rodney gain a new love for life, and most importantly, can he save alternative Earth from the...Well, you're not allowed to label the group in question, or they will hunt you down and rip your head off.

"Marvellous. Mind-blowing. Earth-shattering."-not the author pretending to be someone else

"You wrote a book? What a nerd."-local school bully

"Not only is the author of this book better looking than me, but he is a better writer than I ever was."-Shakespeare

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780995690400
Publisher: Dead Leg Publishing
Publication date: 01/30/2017
Pages: 174
Product dimensions: 5.50(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.40(d)

About the Author

Joe Dawson was born in Eyjafjallajökull, where he unintentionally caused the ash cloud that annoyed everyone back in 2010 after he took a dump on the ice cap. Joe was exiled from Iceland and forced to live in a notoriously warm country called England. Brexit happened, and Joe was thrown into the Atlantic Ocean, which was quite odd considering Iceland was not in the EU. Joe now spends his days living under the sea. His hobbies include drowning and getting attacked by sharks.

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