Last Call at the 7-Eleven: Fine Dining at 2 A.M., The Search for Spandex People, and Other Reasons to Go On Living

Last Call at the 7-Eleven: Fine Dining at 2 A.M., The Search for Spandex People, and Other Reasons to Go On Living

by Kevin Cowherd

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The country might be going to hell in a hand-basket, but don’t close the garage doors and sit there with the engine running until you read this collection of sardonic, off-the-wall pieces on modern life by one of America’s best humorists. Described as “another Dave Barry, only with a lot less going for him,” Baltimore Sun columnist Kevin Cowherd sizzles as he tackles such loopy subjects as:

- Larry King’s interview with God (“El Paso, Texas, you’re on the air with the Almighty . . .”

- Fine dining at a 7-Eleven at 2 a.m. (“Moving briskly past the Test-Your-Blood-Pressure machine and the Hormel chili section, we arrive at the rack of Slim Jims.”)

- $20 million lottery winners who insist on keeping their jobs (“Oh yeah, I’ll be back at Mr. Tire first thing in the morning.”)

- The joys of backyard wiffleball (“Wiffleball is for anyone willing to shrug off a full speed collision with a tool shed and six months of subsequent blackouts just to snare a grounder up the middle.”)

- Thanksgiving dinner with Howard Stern (“Yo, sweetie, pass the cranberry sauce. What are you, stupid? Only a friggin’ moron would pass the mashed potatoes when I asked for the cranberry sauce.”)

- Modest people looking for love in the personals (“5-foot-9 guy with spare tire, bags under his eyes, not much of a chin, looks like your grocer, seeks woman.”).

Product Details

BN ID: 2940012629999
Publisher: Bancroft Press
Publication date: 11/22/1995
Sold by: Barnes & Noble
Format: NOOK Book
Pages: 229
File size: 285 KB

About the Author

Kevin Cowherd is a humor columnist and feature writer for the Baltimore Sun. His columns began in 1987, and are a featured attraction for the LA Times-Washington Post news service. His column has appeared in large, small, and in-between circulation newspapers in every part of the U.S. and Canada.

Cowherd lives with his wife and three children in the Baltimore suburbs. In 1990, his humor columns took the top prize for commentary in a prestigious contest: the American Association of Sunday and Feature Editors' Excellence in Feature Writing Awards.

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