Listen Up: How to Improve Relationships, Reduce Stress

Listen Up: How to Improve Relationships, Reduce Stress

by Larry Lee Barker, Kittie W. Watson

Hardcover(REV)

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Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780312242657
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
Publication date: 10/28/2000
Edition description: REV
Pages: 288
Product dimensions: 6.43(w) x 9.58(h) x 0.82(d)

Table of Contents

Foreword xv
Introduction xvii
The Power of Listening: How Listeners Control Communication
Three Common Dangerous Assumptions About Listening
2(5)
Listening with Power
7(1)
Giving Up Listening Power
8(2)
The Benefits of Listening Power
10(6)
The Power to Choose
16(5)
Listening with a Preference: How Each of Us Has Our Own Listening Style
Listener Preference Profile
21(2)
Listener Preference Interpretation
23(1)
Four Listening Preferences
24(5)
Multiple Preferences
29(3)
No Listening Preference
32(1)
Listening Introversion
32(1)
Listening Burnout
33(1)
Listener Preferences: A Few Reminders
34(7)
Switching Channels Without a Remote: How to Adapt to Others' Listening Preferences to Improve Communication
Three Listener Preference Principles
41(3)
What We've Discovered About Listener Preferences
44(1)
Assessing Listener Preferences
45(2)
Listener Preference Cues and Clues
47(1)
Packaging Communication to Match Others' Preferences
47(6)
Appreciating Differences
53(3)
Listening Barriers: Exploring and Overcoming Obstacles
Listening as a Lethal Weapon
56(1)
The Greatest Listening Paradox
57(3)
Three Common Listening Pitfalls
60(2)
Jump-starting Listening Improvement
62(3)
Immediate Rewards
65(3)
Listening Is Not a Spectator Sport: Limited Energy Supply and Listener Burnout
Listening Burnout: Listening Harder Isn't Listening Smarter
68(1)
Maximizing Listening Energy
69(1)
Listening Energy Reservoirs
70(2)
Your Listening Reserve Tank
72(1)
Listening Energy Sappers
73(2)
Six Ways to Refuel Listening Energy
75(11)
I'm Okay, But I'm Not So Sure About You: How Poor Listening Damages Relationships
Irritating Listening Habits
86(2)
Hurting the Ones You Love
88(1)
The Sounds of Silence
89(2)
The Impact of Poor Listening Habits
91(5)
Managing Listening Expectations
96(2)
Changing Listening Habits
98(9)
Listening Makes It Better: Good Listeners Are Always in Demand
Characteristics of Effective Listeners
107(2)
Successful Strategies for Improving Listening in Relationships
109(15)
She Hears ... He Hears: How Men and Women Listen Differently
Women's Biggest Complaint About Men: "They never listen."
124(1)
Do Men and Women Really Listen Differently?
125(2)
How Do Men and Women Listen?
127(6)
Power Versus Relationship Issues
133(1)
Who's Better at Listening: Men or Women?
134(4)
Three Strategies for Improving Listening Between the Sexes
138(5)
Across Generations: Listening to Children, Teens, and the Elderly
Listening to Young Children
143(3)
Listening to Teenagers
146(3)
Listening to the Elderly
149(2)
The Gift of Empathy
151(6)
Lend Me Your Ear: How Speakers Can Hold Interest and Attention
The PIER Listening Model
157(9)
Some Reminders About the PIER Listening Model
166(4)
Winning by Listening Around: Giving and Receiving Feedback
Why We're Reluctant to Give Feedback
170(2)
How to Give and Receive Feedback
172(5)
Take the Static Out of Feedback Responses
177(3)
Three Feedback Strategies to Manage Others
180(5)
To Contract the Authors
185(2)
For Further Reading
187(4)
Index 191

What People are Saying About This

Joel Marks

Larry Barker and Kittie Watson have been listening. Based on more than twenty years of research, they have identified where the real power in communication resides. Leaders, post a new sign on the door: Listener In Charge!
—Joel Marks, Executive Vice President, corVISION Media

Clive Hammant

A must-read for any negotiator or project manager. I particularly appreciated the chapter on one's inner voice and how it can get in the way of quality listening.
—Clive Hammant, Director, Licensing and Development, Pfizer, Inc.

Charles Roberts

Reading Listen Up is like having your own listening consultants whispering in your ear. Any reader who wants to increase his or her effectiveness at home, at work, or socially should read this book. It helped me understand much more about how I listen - and how to help others listen to me.—Charles Roberts, President, International Listening Association, and Chair/Professor, Department of Communication, East Tennessee State University

David J. Lieberman

Listen Up is an outstanding book. It's well researched, practical, and effective. Read this book and get more out of every relationship.
—David J. Lieberman, Ph.D., author of Never Be Lied to Again

Stephen Covey

Over half of our waking hours are spent in some form of communication-and about half of that time is spent listening. We've all had years of training in reading, writing, and speaking but few have had more than a week in listening. This book helps fill that gap, giving scores of practical applications. It beautifully teaches the how and what and why of listening.
—Dr. Stephen Covey, author of The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

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