Live and Love Life: Poems of Healing

Live and Love Life: Poems of Healing

by Latrice Tillman

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Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781469738123
Publisher: iUniverse, Incorporated
Publication date: 02/18/2012
Pages: 88
Product dimensions: 5.50(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.21(d)

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Live and Love Life

Poems of Healing
By Latrice Tillman

iUniverse, Inc.

Copyright © 2012 Latrice Tillman
All right reserved.

ISBN: 978-1-4697-3812-3


Chapter One

        Acceptance


        Bigger and Better


    I am small.
    Yes, you are bigger.
    But, bigger is not better.
    Hello bigger; I'm better.
    Better is more than bigger.


        Complete

    Complete and whole—I am ...
    Not made to feel complete, only if I have a man.
    Yes, God has created a man that is perfect for me.
    But, he's an addition to the woman I already exist to be.

    Sometimes, desolate but lonesome is something that I never am.
    Distance from all is a reserve and essential to God's plan.
    Strength is developed out of weakness; especially during the
      absence of man.
    I can't always be present for all and neglect myself, only to drain
      me of all that I am.

    But, even in distance and being apart, together—we stand.
    Solitude helps to refresh and thus far rejuvenates being human.
    Sporadic distance from everyone and everything can be wholesome
      and positive.
    Consistent company and companionship are additions but not
      required to live.

    People, places, and things are only additions and catalysts, as I am
      already existing.
    I am primitive and fundamental, so there is nothing missing.
    I'm the majority and God is my all and the primary. We are the
      perfect equation.
    All kinship after that are merely secondary relations.

    I have no need to put others down to help me to step up.
    Being negative or decreasing in others does not give favorable
      luck.
    And no one on this earth has to speak or hold me still.
    I am made whole and healed by a power that is ecstatically real.

    No longer broken. Now, I'm resilient; therefore, allergic to
      defeat.
    Made perfectly as I am, I am whole and complete.


        Hey world, this is me

    Acceptance, approval, willing to accept.
    Acceptance of who I am—God didn't make a mistake: He made
      me correct.
    Thick hair. Nice when long. Cut it short and it quickly grows
      back.
    I am the final, perfect copy of me. He didn't even need to make
      a draft.

    My small, short frame with beautiful brown eyes.
    Although never 20/20, enough to thank Him as I look up at the
      sky.
    Doctor said, "she will be blind" and yet I came out with at least
      some vision.
    Sensitiveness to illness but glad that I am living.

    Used to have seizures but now check out the brain and mind.
    People calling me genius, wise beyond my years and one of a
      kind.
    Beautiful white teeth and I've learned to accept their size.
    After all, they must be perfect, as people always compliment my
      beautiful smile.

    Small ears but I can hear; better small than big.
    But even if big, who cares—if to sound, they are receptive.
    No huge breasts, no big butt, no big thighs, no big legs, no big
      hips.
    Nose small and big simultaneously and the same with the lips.

    Sounds crazy I know but I refuse to take medicine, surgery, reduce,
      enlarge, or try to gain;
    Then age more and have to undo and return to the doctor to fix
      again and again.
    Body—attractive, as is my mind and spirit, which are most
      important and above all.
    I love and accept myself and I stand with confidence—5 ft 3
      inches physically—but mentally, I am very tall!


        Hidden Treasure

    Searching and searching but yet never to find,
    As if only to discover and obtain in the mind.
    Traveling and traveling—the distance is extremely expansive and
      so exceedingly far.
    But to search far, not knowing it's near, is more than bizarre.
    And yet so easily or just seemingly causing a loss to some ...
    Unfortunate only to discover when it's too late and long gone.
    But not to worry because if it occurs once—can't it occur twice
      and many more?
    Realization is vital to conquer and discover exactly what is being
      reached and striven for.
    Whatever the desire—when exposed—stretch and reach, until it
      is touched.
    But then upon conquer—is a realization that—already in
      existence—was such.


        Judged and Stereotyped

    Too small, too colorful, not enough. Too big, too dull, too much.
    Too black, too white, lacking color. The wrong texture, not enough
      luster.
    Too short, too soft, too tough. Too hot, too cold, too rough.

    Toot all, too light, too dark. Not enough knowledge and experience,
      too smart.
    Too wise, too open, too closed. Too many yes's, too many no's.
    Too little faith, too many rich, too many poor. Too many choices,
      too many closed doors.

    Too mean, too nice, too confused. Too much winning, too much
      to lose.
    Too old, too young, too unforgiving. Too much of too—this and
      that—for living.
    Hard to live, impossible to see with no eyes. Judgmental vision
      creates blindness and causes a substantial lively vision to die.


        Self-discovery

    When you settle for the sideline, you miss the champion in the
      game,
    All because you allow yourself to be easily intimidated, but only
      you are to blame.
    Why settle for losing—instead of taking a chance to win?
    When given a 2nd chance, play hard from start to end.
    Play exceedingly hard, like never ever before.
    Thank God for 2nd chances and closing dead end doors.

    Now, I recognize how silly of me to settle for so long,
    Thinking I'm valueless and not worth much, so I would just keep
      accepting what was always wrong.
    Of course, I didn't know any better but now I am set free.
    Now I know who I am; yes, I have value and will never again
      accept what is beneath me.
    What an affective lesson: it taught the great significance of a
      woman's worth.
    If you don't know what and who you are, your life is truly lived
      like it is cursed.

    So much misfortune and wondering why limitations and can only
      get so far ahead.
    Then, when you shake free, you realize you were living as if
      dead.
    Dead and empty inside, you were, and never could reach true
      happiness and peace.
    Keeping company with those whose purpose was to keep you in
      defeat.

    Before returning to the dead phase, I'd rather be dead indeed.
    But stepping back is never an option, as God always has better
      for me.

    It is vital to heal from life's pains or you'll seek fulfillment from
      the wrong person when there's nothing they can give.
    Eventually only added pains—unnecessarily—and more reasons
      to die than live.
    Young, lost, desperate, hurt, confused—was just trying to find my
      way.
    No more time and energy of such a huge mistake!
    I finally healed the holes and tied the gaps: no more dead
      weight.
    I am glad to announce—I am here! I have finally arrived today!


        Sister

    Ever since she went away, my life hasn't been the same.
    And knowing God needed her more does not take away the
      pain.
    I miss her so much—she was my sister but also my best friend.
    Her life ended and for me, a new painful life started to begin.

    We would laugh, talk, and sing for hours, as if we were the same
      age.
    She was 5 years older but she taught me so much; we were always
      on the same page.
    As long as she was around, we could always find a reason to
      laugh.
    Despite our lives not being perfect and her having to grow up
      fast.

    Such warmth and protection—she was a mother by nature, even
      prior to my nephew,
    And now she would be a grandmother because nephew has a
      few.
    Funny to picture her as a granny—now it has been so much
      time ...
    Since I last saw or even dreamed about, but you still stay on my
      mind.

    I know I'm in my 30s but I still yearn to once again have a big
      sister.
    It hurt so badly when time came and ages matched up: All I
      could meditate on is how I missed her.

    Attempted to come and join you but now I know to wait until
      it's my time.
    Why is the pain just as fresh as yesterday and constantly in my
      mind?

    I wish I knew more to say on that day.
    We said we loved each other and I watched you walk away.
    I continued to stare until you were out of sight and I felt something
      was wrong.
    I just couldn't figure the feeling was telling me that you wouldn't
      return home.
    Although I said I love you, it wasn't enough: I have so much more
      to say;
    But, me and you haven't ended: I love you big sis and see you on
      that day!


        Window Shopping

    Looking down, although she had plenty, she felt like it was never
      enough.
    Thinking, "a new pair of shoes, because these seem to have a small
      scuff".
    Fresh, crisp air on such a warm, lovely spring day—good for
      shopping so she trotted along her way;
    With excess to spend and no limit to what she was willing to
      pay.

    First stop—store so enticing with so many beautiful but eccentric
      shoes.
    2 pairs didn't fit comfortably but yet she purchased and on—she
      moved.
    2 pairs, 3 pairs, 4 pairs and sometimes she would only window
      shop ...
    Adoring what was on the other side but just for the brief
      moment—she stopped.

    When she saw shoes so beautifully worn and tried by other
      customers inside ...
    Only then was when she was sure to venture in and give the shoes
      a try.
    From the outside, looking in—the shoes appeared beautifully
      worn.
    Humorously enough, she arrived home to try a pair again and
      how easily the shoe was torn.

    Expensively paid for; eccentric and embellished with designs and
      décor.
    Such a huge price paid for shoes unfortunately not properly fitting
      because for others—the shoes are only customized for.


        Within, Without

    If you say oppose but they say agree,
    Stand your ground and let them know what you mean.
    Life is not about acceptance beyond the acceptance of one's self.
    It's about loving yourself even when there is nobody else . . .
    Around or loving you but you must continue to do well without
      and within.

    Sometimes it's better to do without because when you lose, you
      learn to win.
    When winning, there are places many and much can not go.
    As you develop and travel your path, only carry along what helps
      you to grow.
    When strong and hopeful within, the energy in transforms out
      and begins to manifest.
    Don't conform to the norm; just be you because that's what you
      can be—the best.

        Endurance


        Eternal Dismay


    A blue sky embodied by white clouds shaped like wings; but the
      wings' outline is filled with gray.
    Numerous closed eyes and deaf ears but the lips are immutable as
      they part with much to say.
    Emotionless and heartless, but the words attempt to express the
      feelings of someone else's blues.
    Words with no meaning, feeling worse than a broken bone;
      bringing shame like when champions lose.

    Bouncing off the enclosed walls of a dead end is lies, betrayal,
      hatred ... so hard to forgive.
    Causing more problems than disabling stress, but somehow I
      live.
    Concealed secrets inside, how do I let it out?
    It helps to talk about things; but, in this case ... I doubt it.

    My entire life has been a secret, will it all ever be told?
    Put my story in a book ... may be the bestseller ever sold.
    How can I put it all behind—who can I blame?
    It is not I, someone else deserves the fame.

    It strikes harder than labor pain and it moves fast.
    It's upsetting like ongoing dental pain ... how long will it last?
    How much longer can I run, fight, and pretend?
    What I feel is slowly killing me within.

    The burn is deeper than a chemical or fire could ever burn.
    Spreads faster than disease, worse than the feeling of mourn.
    Tears you faster than a machete, is hotter than a flame.
    Please help me to stop it: I know God will take away the pain.


        Giving birth

    Giving birth can be draining and full of extreme and torturous
      pain.
    Amazing how that excruciating pain can produce such beauty.
    Giving so much of yourself but simultaneously you also gain.
    And after the birth has taken place, you have some new exciting
      duties.
    The pain of birth is unfortunate but for what it brings forth ...
    Fruitful changes and strength come from pain and sorrow.
    But, the sorrows and pains are affordable for their ultimate
      splendid worth.
    What is pain and weakness today will produce pleasure and
      strength for tomorrow.
    But, so much labor is involved before creation of a new life to
      live.
    All that we go through is to propel us toward an embellished
      destiny;
    A baby gives new gracious meaning to life and a grateful
      perspective;
    Just as Goliath existed to promote David, some are promoted by
      the birth of a baby.

    If you are going to give birth and your baby is a carnal baby,
      purpose or vision,
    The only way to it is through it and inevitable pain is vital to the
      mission.


        Giving Birth II

    Although it may hurt, you must push, push, and push again.
    Continue pushing throughout all of the pain.
    For what waits, is a pleasure and a blessing indeed.
    Pleasure produced after so much suffering and pain—hard to
      believe.
    But, push, push, and push again.

    Giving birth exemplifies an unexplainable gift.
    It can shine the light on elements that may have otherwise been
      missed ...
    Gives a new pair of eyes for a new sight to see.
    More motivation than ever and another reason to exist and be.
    So, push, push, and push again.

    Push into empowerment; although, deliverance was through hurt
      and grief,
    It's the channel most dreams travel and are birthed into reality—but
      only after so much perseverance, persistence, and belief.

(Continues...)



Excerpted from Live and Love Life by Latrice Tillman Copyright © 2012 by Latrice Tillman. Excerpted by permission of iUniverse, Inc.. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

Table of Contents

Contents

Acceptance....................1
Endurance....................17
Faith and Hope....................27
Focus....................37
Gratitude....................45
Love....................53
Time....................69

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