Living Fully In The Shadow Of Death

Living Fully In The Shadow Of Death

by Susan Zonnebelt-Smeenge, Robert C. DeVries

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Overview

Living Fully In The Shadow Of Death by Susan Zonnebelt-Smeenge, Robert C. DeVries

A life-affirming book that will give you the answers-practical, emotional, and spiritual-about facing any death, your own or someone else's, with peace and confidence.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780801065071
Publisher: Baker Publishing Group
Publication date: 07/01/2004
Pages: 276
Product dimensions: 6.00(w) x 9.00(h) x 0.62(d)

Table of Contents

Acknowledgments11
Preface13
1Daylight: Death Yet Unseen
The Mental Health Perspective on Life19
Death Is a Part of Life19
Society's Reluctance to Face the Reality of Death20
Assessing Your Life to This Point21
Evaluating Your Past and Present Relationships23
What Kind of Relationship Can You Have with Yourself?26
Planning for Your Death28
Planning for Your Legal and Financial Needs29
Planning Your Memorial or Funeral Service and Disposition of Your Body31
What Do You Think about the Dying Process, Death, and the Afterlife?31
What Is Dying Like Emotionally?34
How Do Children Think about Death?37
If I Were to Die, What Would Happen Then?45
Christian Meditations on Life47
Forty Days and Forty Nights (How do I understand the seasons of my life?)48
Taking Charge of Life (Am I really in charge of my life?)51
To Life! (What is "life"?)54
I Can Do Everything! (What am I really capable of doing, and how?)57
Living in His Presence (How do I determine my priorities and spiritual values?)60
Mirror, Mirror, on the Wall (What does it mean to be created in God's image?)63
Loving God, Loving Me, Loving You (What is a Christian perspective on loving God, myself, and others?)66
Are Loved Ones and Friends Ours Forever? (What are the qualities and characteristics of Christian friendships?)70
Kids Say the Darndest Things (How can I develop childlike curiosity and faith?)74
The Manna Syndrome: Waiting and Trusting (What is the nature of God's daily grace?)77
Heads or Tails? Are Decisions God's or Ours? (How do I make responsible decisions?)81
How Long Do I Have? (What makes for a full and happy life?)84
2Dusk: The Knock at the Door
The Mental Health Perspective on Facing the Possibility of dying: Part One: What Do You Do When the News Isn't Good?89
What's Going on Here? Understanding the Diagnosis91
Isn't There Hope? Looking at the Positive and Negative Aspects91
Learning More about Your Diagnosis92
What happened in my body?
Do I really need to treat this condition?
How can I balance quantity with quality of life?
What treatment options are available for me?
What are the potential side effects of these options?
Who Will Go through This with Me?97
How Do I Manage My Life's Goals, Values, and Priorities?100
Life questions--Am I pursuing goals that are based on what I value most?
Spiritual questions--Where am I spiritually and how will this impact my potential death?
As a Family Member: To Tell or Not Tell the Diagnosis to Your Seriously III Loved One102
The Mental Health Perspective on Facing the Possibility of dying: Part Two: Summarizing Your Life--What Do I Need to Attend To?105
Money, Property, and Legal Issues106
Planning for My Dying and Funeral108
Would I like to die at home or a hospital, and what about using hospice?
What do I want in my obituary, life story, and ethical will?
What about donating my organs, eyes, or tissues?
Should there be an autopsy after I die?
What about funerals, memorials, and memories?
How do I want my family to deal with my body?
Should I plan a visitation for family and friends?
What do I need to consider in planning the funeral service?
How do I plan my burial or the scattering of my ashes?
What about a monument or marker?
How Do I Talk about the Tough Stuff?124
A closer look at family communication
Communicating with congruence
Forgiving: Why is this important if I am going to die anyway?
Letting yourself off the hook--accepting self-forgiveness
Dusk Has Arrived: A Perspective132
Christian Meditations on Facing the Possibility of Dying133
Divine Insurance (How do I trust God when things go bad?)134
God's Grand Design for His People (Does God still have a purpose for me when I face the possibility of death?)138
The Right Time (Do things always happen at the right time?)142
What Went Wrong? (Where did evil and death come from?)145
Death Is Gain (Do I have to see death as a good thing?)148
How Great Is God? (If God is all powerful, why doesn't he always answer our prayers by healing us?)151
Centurion Faith (Doesn't the Bible teach that God heals us if we have enough faith?)154
He Heals All Our Diseases (How does God's healing actually happen?)157
What If I Had Done Things Differently? (What do I do about my regrets?)160
Wasting Away? (How do I keep from despair when my body is wasting away?)164
Rotten Produce (What can I realistically hope for?)167
Trials and Temptations (Should I be happy because I have this potentially terminal illness?)170
3Midnight: The Day Has Ended
The Mental Health Perspective on Facing Death175
Walking the Final Leg175
The Difference between Dusk and Midnight176
One Last Chance to Make Final Arrangements179
Are legal, financial, and end-of-life decisions in place for your death?
What are your priorities for your last few months or weeks?
Getting the Emotional Support You Need When You Need It: Visits from Others184
Will Your Family Actually Provide for Your Care?185
Who Do I Want with Me during My Final Days?187
Communicating in These Last Months, Weeks, and Days188
Now It's Time for Life Closure: Letting Go and Dying a "Good" Death189
For Loved Ones: The Aftermath of Letting Go192
The Physical Aspects of Dying: The Last Few Weeks and Days193
Will I Suffer? Pain and Symptom Management196
The Bedside Vigil197
A Light, a Person's Image, or Some Other Visualization from "Beyond"197
Recognizing When Your Loved One Has Died198
The Funeral Staff Comes to Take the Body--Then What?200
What Happens to Those Left Behind? Introducing the Grief Journey202
Christian Meditations on Facing Death207
Bowing Low (Why is it so hard to let go of this life?)208
Praying for the Miracle (Do my prayers for healing really make a difference?)211
Grave Thoughts (If my body dies, am I dead?)215
The Grand Parade at Christ's Return (What happens if I have already died when Christ returns? What is the hope for those still here?)219
Facing the Judge (What will it be like for a Christian to face the final judgment?)222
Good-bye, My Loved Ones, Good-Bye (How do Christians say good-bye to their loved ones?)225
Preludes and Postludes (How do I balance my desire to hang on to life with letting go for what is to come?)228
Ashes to Ashes; Dust to Dust (What happens to my body when I die? May a Christian be cremated?)232
Comfort (How can I use my dying to help others?)236
Patience (Why is it so hard to be patient?)239
My God, My God, Why Have You Forsaken Me? (Will God really be there when I die?)242
Standing on the Front Porch of Heaven (What does heaven look like?)245
In the Beginning (When does eternity begin?)248
Cry No More, My Friend (What is the meaning of shalom, this heavenly peace?)251
When We All Get to Heaven (Will we see and know each other in heaven?)255
Ministering Angels (Are ministering angels near me now?)259
Epilogue263
AppendixRecommended Books to Help Children, Adolescents, and Young Adults Deal with Death and Grief265
Notes269
Index271

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5 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 1 reviews.
Guest More than 1 year ago
Dr. Smeenge and Dr. DeVries combine again to to help us look at life, before, during and after death. They encourage us not to flee from death but to accept and prepare for it. They offer wise suggestions as to how to take stock of our life so as to better live to the fullest and die with peace and dignity. There are pratical suggestions as to how to evaluate one's values and reorder one's life to achieve less regret, more satisfaction. Biblical principals guide the reader and well as sound psychological techiniques. The reassuring grace of God's word rings in Dr. De Vries' 40 meditations that grapple with issues of life and death. Hospice workers, clery, nurses, physicians, and psychotherapists who help others deal with living and dying, should not miss this rich resource. Family members and all of those who will die some day should stop and take note of this guide to better living and better dying. I liked this book and you will too. It is written for us all. Thanks Susan and Bob!