Medical examiner Alan Spaulding leads a routine and cautious life. He eats healthy, works out, and abstains from all vices except for the occasional glass of wine. That all changes when he meets Joe, a cigarette-smoking, fast food-eating bona fide vampire, who reveals to Alan a world that he didn’t know existed…and also intrigues Alan quite a bit. Like, Joe eats White Castle–so does he poop? How come all the blood doesn’t pool in one place in his body? Also, can he have sex?