Mary Lincoln Demystified: Frequently Asked Questions about Abraham's Wife

by Donna D. McCreary

Overview

WINNER, 2023 Illinois State Historical Society Superior Achievement Award in “Books, Scholarly”!

Answering the most enigmatic questions about Mary Lincoln’s life

After portraying Mary Lincoln in hundreds of performances and giving lectures over a more than thirty-year career, Donna D. McCreary has fielded every imaginable inquiry about the First Lady. Gathered here, readers will find answers to the most frequently asked questions to come from live audiences. This first question-and-answer book arises directly from a public’s enduring curiosity with one the country’s most important historical figures. Decades of conversations with audiences, scholars, and relatives of the Todd family frame McCreary’s intimate and devoted research to offer a new and unique portrait of the most tragic First Lady. 

Though Mary has been portrayed in books and film, McCreary’s book contains information not found elsewhere—details others have overlooked and those that would not fit well into a narrative history—such as lists of Mary’s beaus, servants, and the people the Todd family enslaved; appendixes that present mini-biographies of families and friends; and a uniquely thorough timeline. Mary Lincoln Demystified covers areas in which McCreary’s audiences have expressed the most interest: Mary’s sanity, her family relationships, her views on slavery and African Americans, her personality and habits, and what happened to her possessions and children after she died.

While sympathetic to the woman she portrayed for two decades, McCreary examines both sides of controversial issues and presents the facts with her trademark style and flair. More than a good read, McCreary’s Q&A factbook, based as it is on decades of extensive research in primary and secondary sources, will be the definitive resource for answers about Mary for years to come.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780809338696
Publisher:	Southern Illinois University Press
Publication date:	12/02/2022
Pages:	366
Product dimensions:	5.90(w) x 8.90(h) x 1.10(d)

About the Author

Donna D. McCreary, a writer, lecturer, and performer, is the author of Lincoln’s Table: Victorian Recipes from Kentucky, Indiana, and Illinois to the White House and Fashionable First Lady: The Victorian Wardrobe of Mary Lincoln. McCreary portrayed Mary Lincoln from 1992 to 2012 and now lectures at Lincoln sites, museums, and libraries throughout the Midwest. She is a cofounder of Mary Lincoln’s Coterie.

Read an Excerpt

INTRODUCTION

Mary has been called the First Lady of Controversy. This moniker comes from the variety of stories that have circulated about her since Abraham became the Republican candidate in 1860. Was Mary a Confederate spy? Why did she purchase one thousand dollars’ worth of mourning clothing before her husband’s death? Did she believe in ghosts? Those answering these questions have offered a variance to the truth. Often, their answers are simply incorrect. Rumors, untruths, incorrect information, and lies have been told and written about Mary for generations. My purpose here is to present both sides of an issue and examine the documentation that explains Mary’s actions and truths.  

My research journey led to not only questions asked by audience members, but also those that I wondered about myself. As I moved away from performance work and more into developing lectures, I often sought the trivial that do not fit neatly into the narrative of a biography. Having a list of Mary’s siblings, her servants, African Americans she knew, and the names of her friends, often do not fit into a life story. Most of the biographies about Mary also get bogged down with details about Abraham. While it is impossible to tell Mary’s life story without including Abraham, this Q&A book places the focus on Mary and allows the reader to quickly find answers without searching through a narrative.  

I need to state up front that I do lean towards an empathetic and sympathetic view of Mary. Having presented as Mary for decades, I have developed an understanding of Mary as a mother, a wife, and a woman. When a historian answers questions after performances and lectures, it is their responsibility to explain Mary’s story. For those who answer questions in first person as the historical figure, as I have, the ability to think quickly, and in character, is crucial to the performance. Of course, “Mary” would be sympathetic to herself and defensive of her actions. Some of this perspective does carry over into the answers presented in the book, but I have presented evidence for both sides of issues. 

This book is divided into ten chapters. The first five chapters are presented in chronological order and can be considered a biography of Mary through questions. Chapters are dedicated to her girlhood in Lexington, Kentucky; her adulthood in Springfield, Illinois; the First Lady years in Washington; the death of her husband, and her Widowhood of self-exile. Chapter Four is dedicated to Lincoln’s assassination, since it is the singular most traumatic day of Mary’s life. Countless books have been written about this one night. For Mary, the event deserves a chapter of its own. 

The rest of the chapters delve into various aspects of Mary’s life. By addressing these topics in a Q&A format, I can incorporate detailed information that may not be appropriate in a narrative biography. For example, lists of hired girls and servants, the enslaved persons owned by the Todd family, and the proper birth order of Mary’s siblings, are well suited for a Q&A format.  

Chapter six looks at the facts of the insanity trial and investigates whether Mary suffered from mental illness. Historians will never agree on Mary’s mental health, so my purpose is to present the evidence and allow readers to draw their own conclusions.  

Mary’s family relationships were dramatic, ranging between periods of sheer delight and friendship, distrust and dismay, to dependence and support. Chapter seven delves into these complicated relationships and explaining Mary’s ever-changing relationships with them.  

Chapter eight looks at Mary’s relations with the African American community in her youth and in her adult life. While historians have written about Abraham’s feelings on slavery and race relations, other than her relationship with Elizabeth Keckly,i Mary’s thoughts have been, in the main, ignored. But they need to be interrogated. Mary grew up in a slave-holding family. She hired African American servants both in Springfield and Washington. Mary developed friendships with African American men and women.  

Chapter nine examines Mary’s personality and habits. In today’s world of social media and celebrity infatuation, people want to know personal tidbits about historical figures as well.  

The last chapter is a look at Lincoln descendants, the family legacy, and Mary’s place in history. These questions are those that one can never answer when presenting a historical figure but are often asked either after the curtain has fallen, or after a lecture.  

The three appendixes offer information which helps the reader understand those people who were in Mary’s life. Her friends, and her family. Often, names within a family are repeated. Having a list of them helps sort them out. The last appendix is a timeline for Mary. Knowing where she was, or what she was doing on a (given) day, helps readers understand the requirements of a First Lady. Seeing how much she traveled during her widowhood allows one to understand why she felt she lived in a land among strangers.  

When writing a biography, authors usually take a stand on one side of an issue, such as “Was Mary Lincoln insane?” My purpose is to explain both sides by presenting the facts. Yes, she was declared insane in a court of law, but she was released from a sanitarium four months later.  I have always wanted to know the details of the story. While most biographers may be happy stating that one of Mary’s beaus was the grandson of Patrick Henry, I searched until I found his name. This book includes this and other pieces of trivia that will give a better understanding of who Mary was as a woman. 

And Mary was a complicated woman - an enigma. She was a loving daughter, a devoted wife, a compassionate mother, a controversial First Lady, and an eccentric recluse. Her complex life offers many questions. Some of the answers can be found here. 

[end of excerpt]

Table of Contents

CONTENTS 

List of Illustrations
Preface

Introduction 
1. Mary Grows Up in the Bluegrass: The Lexington Years, 1818 to 1835
2. Wife, Mother, and Friend: The Springfield Years, 1835 to February 1861
3.  Assailed from All Sides: The White House Years, 1860 to 1865
4. The Darkest Night of All: Lincoln’s Assassination, April 15, 1865
5. Widowhood and Exile, 1865 to 1882
6. The Issue of Sanity
7. Family Relationships
8. Mary, The Issue of Slavery, and African Americans
9. Personality and Personal Habits
10. Beyond the Grave 
Appendix I - Her Family
Appendix II - Her Friends
Appendix III - Timeline

Notes
Acknowledgments 
Bibliography
Index

Editorial Reviews

The remarkable amount of biographical and interpretive coverage in this volume is a tribute to the author’s persistence and ability. Donna D. McCreary has cleared away whole swaths of error in fact or opinion left by previous writers and passers-by about Mary Lincoln. If the author had merely touched upon her great knowledge of Mary’s wardrobe, family, photographs, travels, views on slavery or suffrage, or friends, this book would still be invaluable; yet she has addressed in depth two dozen more topics than those. At last, Mary Lincoln is given her due.” —James M. Cornelius, coauthor of Under Lincoln’s Hat: 100 Objects That Tell the Story of His Life and Legacy

“Dismissing Mary Lincoln as a villain does no justice to her, to Abraham Lincoln, or to history. She was not a caricature. She was a complicated, intelligent, passionate, flawed human being. To demystify her is to know her better and, in turn, to know Abraham Lincoln better; and McCreary seeks to do just that by illustrating Mary Lincoln’s humanity.”—Stacy Pratt McDermott, author of Mary Lincoln: Southern Girl, Northern Woman

“McCreary offers many interesting—and uncommon—details about our famous first lady, and includes some downright unique information. It has been years since I’ve read any new or detailed information about the Todd family and Mary’s dynamic within it; and McCreary’s chapter on Mary’s experiences and opinions regarding slavery and African Americans is something that has been sorely needed in the canon for a long time.”—Jason Emerson, author of The Madness of Mary Lincoln and Mary Lincoln for the Ages 

“It’s doubtful that anyone, not even Abraham, ever believed they had fully demystified Mary Lincoln, but in laying the most important questions before us and offering accessible and well-informed answers, Donna McCreary has done the next best thing.”—Gerald Prokopowicz, Journal of the Abraham Lincoln Association

“McCreary’s insatiable curiosity, encyclopedic knowledge, lucid prose, and inventive QA format allow her to include the multitude of details that cannot all be included in a traditional narrative.”—The National Book Review

“McCreary’s book contains information not found elsewhere… and a uniquely thorough timeline. While sympathetic to the woman she portrayed for two decades, McCreary examines both sides of contro­versial issues and presents the facts with her trademark style and flair. This book will be a fine reference for quite a long time.”—Illinois State Historical Society Awards Selection Committee

From the Publisher