Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, Her Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed

Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, Her Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed

by Lori Gottlieb


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From a New York Times best-selling author, psychotherapist, and national advice columnist, a hilarious, thought-provoking, and surprising new book that takes us behind the scenes of a therapist’s world—where her patients are looking for answers (and so is she).

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781328662057
Publisher: Houghton Mifflin Harcourt
Publication date: 04/02/2019
Pages: 432
Sales rank: 1,233
Product dimensions: 6.40(w) x 8.70(h) x 1.80(d)

About the Author

LORI GOTTLIEB is a psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author who writes the weekly “Dear Therapist” advice column for the Atlantic. A contributing editor for the Atlantic, she also writes for the New York Times Magazine, and is a sought-after expert on relationships, parenting, and hot-button mental health topics in media such as The Today Show, Good Morning America, CBS This Morning, Dr. Phil, CNN, and NPR. She lives in Los Angeles. Learn more at or by following her @LoriGottlieb1 on Twitter.

Table of Contents

Part 1

1 Idiots 3

2 If the Queen Had Balls 11

3 The Space of a Step 18

4 The Smart One or the Hot One 23

5 Namast'ay in Bed 28

6 Finding Wendell 34

7 The Beginning of Knowing 41

8 Rosie 50

9 Snapshots of Ourselves 57

10 The Future Is Also the Present 59

11 Goodbye, Hollywood 68

12 Welcome to Holland 74

13 How Kids Deal with Grief 81

14 Harold and Maude 84

15 Hold the Mayo 89

16 The Whole Package 99

17 Without Memory or Desire 109

Part 2

18 Fridays at Four 119

19 What We Dream Of 126

20 The First Confession 130

21 Therapy with a Condom On 136

22 Jail 148

23 Trader Joe's 155

24 Hello, Family 160

25 The UPS Guy 172

26 Embarrassing Public Encounters 176

27 Wendell's Mother 183

28 Addicted 190

29 The Rapist 198

30 On the Clock 208

Part 3

31 My Wandering Uterus 217

32 Emergency Session 225

33 Karma 232

34 Just Be 239

35 Would You Rather? 242

36 The Speed of Wane 255

37 Ultimate Concerns 262

38 Legoland 269

39 How Humans Change 281

40 Fathers 288

41 Integrity Versus Despair 295

42 My Neshama 305

43 What Not to Say to a Dying Person 309

44 Boyfriend's Email 314

45 Wendell's Beard 318

Part 4

46 The Bees 327

47 Kenya 335

48 Psychological Immune System 337

49 Counseling Versus Therapy 346

50 Deathzilla 352

51 Deal-Myron 358

52 Mothers 366

53 The Hug 372

54 Don't Blow It 378

55 It's My Party and You'll Cry if You Want To 388

56 Happiness Is Sometimes 395

57 Wendell 403

58 A Pause in the Conversation 408

Acknowledgments 413

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Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed 4.8 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 25 reviews.
Anonymous 7 months ago
Very subtle, yet powerful exploration of the therapeutic, healing process from the perspectives of both the therapist and the patient, as well as historical figures in the field of psychiatry. Written very much in laymen’s terms, and therefore feels totally accessible. Really enjoyed getting to know each of the characters as they moved through their stages of grieving, learning, and living.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Insightful, moving, funny at times. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this.
Anonymous 5 months ago
Therapy (and life) from the Therapist's viewpoint. I learned so much from this book. Lori, thank you for sharing!
Anonymous 7 months ago
An insightful book about a therapist who consults her own therapist, and the story by turns is witty and sad, but always inspiring.
Anonymous 8 months ago
Wow! Great story that weaves together a variety of characters that genuinely become palpable and people you care for and you keep turning the pages to stay in touch with them. Write another book, Lori Gottlieb!!
Anonymous 21 days ago
I wasn't sure if I'd like this book but I liked it a lot.
Anonymous 28 days ago
Anonymous 3 months ago
A beautiful tapestry of interconnected stories that unravel you and rebuild the w before hole.
Anonymous 3 months ago
Such a great read. Never wanted to put it down. Best book I've read in a while
Anonymous 3 months ago
This book caused a real awakening in me and allowed me to pause and do some introspection; beutifully written as a novel for those less willing to engage in a self therapy session and yet one of the best self-help books! Thank you; Im glad i own this so i can reread and study some of the sections! Heartwarming, compassionate, yet unsettling- there is work to be done!
Anonymous 6 months ago
This book was very touching and emotional ! I enjoyed seeing both sides of therapy.
Anonymous 6 months ago
This read was wholly satisfying and a small part of me feels like I learned something about myself. I will be sharing this one.
chicpanda 7 months ago
Gottleib's memoir is set in the early days of her practice. The book opens with the chart notes for a new client. She then segues into the inner thoughts as John postures and rambles. He is the bete noire of clients -- one who is determined to be unlikable, and to always be in control. Julie, a 33 year old university professor, in contrast is charming, funny, open and terminally ill. Death is a challenging life topic, especially when a client is facing death almost before her life has begun. Later in the book we meet Rita, depressed she reports that if her life doesn't improve in one year, she plans to 'end it'. Finally there is the client who is going through a traumatic break up. This client is Lori, the Therapist. Thus Gottlieb is able to present therapy from both sides. From the one sitting in the Therapist chair, and the client waiting on the 'couch'. The book offers information on the therapeutic process, the techniques and protocols all offered in a conversational voice. The reader is a witness as the various clients change and grow. Adding the voices of other therapists from her consulting group, along with Wendell allows Gottlieb to share other approaches to healing. Reading the memoir not only informs us of Gottlieb's life, the reader also becomes attached to the client's life story. Gottlieb had a successful career in the entertainment field before she turned to medicine. She attended medical school, then at the suggestion of a valued academic decided to become a mental health counselor. She has is now a contributing editor for Atlantic Magazine. She writes an advice column "Dear Therapist" for Atlantic. In addition she is often sought as an expert in the field of mental health for television and for radio. This book deservedly had become an Instant Best Seller for the New York Times. It is an engaging read providing a lot of insight into therapy West Coast style. Highly recommended
Anonymous 8 months ago
Anonymous 10 months ago
Anonymous 11 months ago
Rarely do most “sane” folks take the time to look at themselves critically. When they do it’s usually because something insane has happened in their lives. Here, Gottlieb give you a chance to consider yourself before that disaster occurs. The result may be the self help you need or maybe a trip to the therapist before things get out of control!
Anonymous 11 months ago
Funny, smart, and educational. I was completely entertained beginning to end.
Anonymous 12 months ago
As a therapist who has also been in therapy at one time, this book brought back memories. I believe my own journey through the angst of self exploration and healing helped shape the therapist I became. As I work toward becoming fully retired, I still sometimes wish I had known what I know now when I was a newly minted psychologist. Kudos to Lori for writing such a deeply engaging book. Thank for sharing with all us your imperfect yet lovable self.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
A excellent book for every age to read..........
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
dieold More than 1 year ago
It took me a week to read the first three hundred pages of this book but I am stringing out the last few pages because I don't want it to end. Lori drew me in to every session as if I was there both as a spectator and a patient, laughing and crying with the turn of each page. She weaves accounts of her personal life and self-analysis into accounts of sessions with her patients that are truly mesmerizing and heartfelt. I saw myself in every chapter, hmmmm, maybe I should talk to someone.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous 4 months ago
Highs and lows, your life, my life- the narrative unravels some of the tangles that are woven into the human condition. Very captivating and insightful read.
Anonymous 11 months ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
While some beautiful threads were woven to give an exotic fabric, or compelling storyline. In the end I felt a lack of completion, or meaningful wrap up. While Miss Gottlieb presented many situations to work through, I never felt she had gotten the tools she had been seeking. How did she know her therapy was over? I did not feel included in that decision. It was an interesting read But it remained light weight when it could have been more substantial,