“Why can’t I be like everyone else,” I’m always asking myself.
Simple events like driving my car, meeting new people, or even making “easy” day-to-day decisions are constant dilemmas for me. Hypervigilance takes over because I swear that same car has taken the same turns that I have. Sheer distrust in nearly every human being has me on the verge of being downright reclusive. And sadly, constantly second-guessing my own judgment makes it difficult, if not impossible to make choices.
PTSD is a constant reminder that I am not the same happy-go-lucky So-Cal girl that I was 11 years ago. A couple of tours of duty to Iraq have made me a changed woman. After over a decade of self –denial, I finally began the journey to get the treatment that I so badly needed.
I want to share my story; of the person I was, the person I became and the person who fights every day just to make it to the end of the night and do it again the next day. I figured maybe, just maybe, there’s someone else out there who’s like me.
Someone who needs to know that they aren’t as alone as they might think.