Moxie's Problem

Moxie's Problem

by Hank Quense


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Do you like fantasy coming-of-age stories? You won't find one more unusual or more humorous than Moxie's Problem.
Moxie is an obnoxious, teenage princess who has led a sheltered life. Until now. She struggles to come to grips with reality. This fantasy comedy takes place against a backdrop of Camelot. But it's a Camelot in a parallel universe.
In Moxie's Problem, Moxie, a teenage princess, leaves her father's castle for the first time to travel to her betroth's home. She is escorted by three Knights of the Round Table, Percivale, Gareth and Bors. Along the way Moxie is stunned by the real world, so different from life in the castle. For one thing, the knights ignore her demands and her commands. They expect her to sleep on the ground, get up at dawn and eat what they can catch or find. Moxie notices how independent they are. The knights do what has to be done whether it's deciding on a route or fighting brigands. Moxie realizes she hasn't been trained to do anything. She doesn't have a life.
When Moxie finally meets her betrothed, she hates him on sight, refuses to marry him, breaks the engagement and demands the knights to escort her home. Percivale and the others are reluctant to spend more time with Moxie but finally agree.
Moxie and the three knights suffer through more adventures together as she gradually puts together a plan to make something of her life. Moxie decides she wants to be the queen after her father dies. But her father refuses to name her as successor. Her uncle also wants the crown and tries to eliminate Moxie's competition.

Meanwhile, Camelot strives to defeat the vicious Saxons on the football field. Merlin, a wizard, investigates the 'Magic of the Mind' using primitive Rorschach charts and Stonehenge is a theater-in-the-round. Sir Tristan writes a play that sounds like something Shakespeare will write a thousand years later. The three knights when not escorting Moxie go on quests in Sherwood Forest and what is now Scotland.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780985006365
Publisher: Strange Worlds Publication
Publication date: 07/11/2014
Pages: 298
Product dimensions: 5.50(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.62(d)

About the Author

Hank Quense writes humorous and satiric scifi and fantasy stories. He also writes about fiction writing and self-publishing. He has published 14 books and 50 short stories along with a few dozen articles. He often lectures on fiction writing and publishing and has a series of guides covering the basics on each subject. He is currently working on a series of two humorous novels that take place in the Camelot era.
He and his wife, Pat, usually vacation in another galaxy or parallel universe. They also time travel occasionally when Hank is searching for new story ideas.
Visit Hank's websites: and

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Moxie's Problem 4.3 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 3 reviews.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Let me start this off by saying that I HATE super deep fantasy stories. Wizard, orcs, elves, ugh! No, thank you! I'm not a fan and never will be. And I ESPECIALLY hate King Arthur and all that knights of the round table garbage. It takes itself way too seriously, and I could never understand why. But just like Mark Twain turned all that seriousness on its head with A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court, Hank Quiense does a similar thing with his book, Moxie's Problem. But instead of using a modern day stranger who enters a strange world of chivalry and battle armor, Hank Quense does something even more impressive in that he uses characters within the King Arthur (Artie) universe and makes it funny. That's a feat all in itself. What makes this story so funny is just how weird it is. Instead of grand scale battles, they play soccer. And instead of Moxie being a blushing damsel in distress, she's super annoying and even kind of ugly (I think I recall one scene where someone says they wouldn't kiss her because she has hair on her face!), so it's a nice switch-up of the tropes that we're all familiar and mostly tired of. But here's the thing. Moxie ISN'T annoying the entire story, and I think that's where this book shines the most. Even with all the humor with the other characters, what I think I like best about this book is Moxie's growth. By the end of the story, she's not the same character that she was in the beginning, which shows the true calling card of a master writer. It's incredible that I grew to like her toward the end of the book. But I do have a big problem with this book, and that's the cover. I know you shouldn't judge a story by what's on the outside, but that cover is just too terrible not to talk about. If this book hadn't been recommended to me, there is no way I would have picked it up. That cover is just not appealing at all and it doesn't match the zany, craziness that happens within. If I had one recommendation for Mr. Quense, it would be to get rid of that cover! The writing is too good to be shackled down by such a crummy looking picture. Other than that, this book is fantastic. A little long, but it kept my interest throughout, so I applaud it. Give it a read.
shivapastures More than 1 year ago
This just isn't a story about Moxie, as the titles character. It's about Arthur, Merlin, the Knights of the Round Table and definitely about Percivale, Bors & Gareth. Come to think of it, it's more about these three guys and their quests, a few of them involving Moxie, which is not to their liking. But getting back to Moxie. She's a princess and her father keeps trying to pawn her off to other people, marriage, kidnapping and the like. She's determined after she's kidnapped, that she really needs to be on her own. But, unfortunately, she doesn't have any skills, except to be nasty to those beneath her. She'll figure it out or so she hopes. 'Moxie realized she had to deal with the constant boredom issue and the only way to do that was to do something with her life. Something besides vegetating in her father's castle. That presented a difficult problem. She hadn't been trained to do anything. While she could read and write, she has no known talents, no known skills. So how was she suppose to decide what to do with the rest of her life?' Monty Python meets Arthurian legend meets coming of age story, of a girl. I honestly could not stop laugh through the whole thing. It was a great parallel universe, where football solves problems. Highly recommend!
ReadersFavorite More than 1 year ago
Reviewed by Michelle Stanley for Readers' Favorite Moxie’s Problem is a humorous fantasy by Hank Quense. Princess Moxie has a big problem. She’s very homely looking and obnoxious, so has difficulty finding suitors. She eventually finds one and is escorted to him by King Arthur’s knights, Gareth, Bors and Percivale. Moxie is accustomed to giving orders, but tests the knights’ patience with her nonstop nagging. It’s her first time venturing outside the castle and she is overwhelmed by her surroundings. The journey inspires Moxie to become her father’s successor, and the princess hatches a plan to get her way, aware she’ll face opposition. Meanwhile, King Arthur constantly defends England against the Saxons by fighting them both in battle and football matches. Fortunately, he has hemp smoking Merlin to assist him, and Guinevere’s cheerleaders to distract the enemy. Reading Moxie’s Problem will keep your attention with the many challenges the knights endure, as well as Moxie’s dilemma. Hank Quense writes with a strong sense of humour so you’ll never get bored. He impresses me with his creative version of King Arthur and his knights, which has its setting in 434 C.E. It’s so original with good descriptive imagery, and you’ll meet a cast of colourful characters who’ll make you laugh. Although Moxie is ill-mannered, I understand the problems she encounters, and admire her determination to solve them. She and the knights who escorted her kept me entertained, but I loved the entire story. I like the cover illustration of Moxie. The novel is enjoyable, and I know its sequel will also entertain.