What's the real truth about the lost city of Atlantis? Who are all those people that show up in your dreams? What the heck is the bloop? what's unusual about the usa patriot act? you'll find the answers to these questions, and many more, in this fun ebook!
Here's an example of what you'll read: The Wild West has a notorious reputation as a place where violence and murder were common-place. If someone cheated a poker, shoot him. If someone stole your horse, shoot him. If the bartender refused to serve you, shoot him. If the McDanigan brothers forgot to give you a birthday present, shoot them. And their dog.
Basically, it was anarchy. Gun-slingers abounded. Shoot-outs were a daily affair. Outlaws and bandits were everywhere. The local sheriffs were powerless to halt the bloodshed.
So how many murders do you think were happening in these western towns at the height of this craziness? How many murders would typically
A hundred? Two hundred? More than that?
In fact,… five.
Five? What the fu… FIVE!?
Yes siree bob. Five was the most murders that any of the old west towns ever saw in one year. The average murder rate was about 1.5 per year – and, of course, not all of those were shootings.
How about Tombstone dammit? Surely there were more than five people shot during the famous gunfight at the OK Corral? Well, no. In fact, ‘only’ three people were killed in that particular shoot-out – and that was Tombstone’s most violent year ever!
Some Demetri Martin Funnies
- “If I have to move up in a building, I choose the elevator over the
escalator. Because one time I was riding the escalator and I tripped. I fell
down the stairs for an hour and a half.”
- “I was on the street. This guy waved to me, and he came up to me and
said, "I'm sorry, I thought you were someone else." And I said, "I am."”
- “I went into a clothes store and a lady came up to me and said, "If you
need anything, I'm Jill". I've never met anyone with a conditional identity
- “I wrapped my Christmas presents early this year, but I used the wrong
paper. See, the paper I used said ‘Happy Birthday’ on it. I didn't want to
waste it so I just wrote ‘Jesus’ on it.”
- “'Sort of' is such a harmless thing to say... Sort of. It's just filler. Sort of.
It doesn't really mean anything. But after certain things, ‘sort of’ means
everything. Like after "I love you” or "You're going to live” or "It's a boy!"”
- “I feel stupid when I write the word ‘banana’. Its like, how many na's are
on this thing? I'm like 'Bana...’ Keep going... ‘Bananana...’ Damn!"”
When George W. Bush introduced a tax cut in 2001, it added over 14,300
pages to the US tax Code.
- “Michael Jackson’s album was only called ‘Bad’ because there wasn’t
enough room on the sleeve for ‘Pathetic.’”
You may be familiar with the 1981 movie “Escape to Victory”.
Set during World War II, it featured a group of Allied prisoners of war
(played by Sylvester Stallone, Michael Caine, and Pelé amongst others)
who passed the time in their Nazi prison camp by playing soccer.
Anyway, their Nazi overlords – seeing an opportunity for a bit of positive
propaganda – assembled their best soccer players, and challenged the
Allies to a game. (Didn’t they know who Pelé was?!)
The Allies – not being too pushed about winning the game -- saw this as
an opportunity to escape from the prison camp.
Well, to cut a long story short, they had the perfect opportunity to make
their escape at half time, but being the competitive types decided to
return and play the second half just to show them Nazis.
Following a second half packed with attempted Nazi cheating – and
glorious Allied slow-motion moves – the good guys came out on top. Then
So, why am I telling you this?
Well, that movie is loosely based on a true story. And, when I saw
‘loosely’, I mean really loosely. Hollywood style loosely.
First off, the matches were between the Nazis and a group of Ukrainian
players -- and took place during the Nazi occupation of that country.
The Ukrainians were clearly superior to the occupiers, because they beat
them easily over several matches – the last result being an 8 – 0
Unfortunately, the Nazis didn’t like this kind of thing, so the Gestapo got
|Publisher:||99 ¢ store, save a lot more|
|Sold by:||Barnes & Noble|
|File size:||2 MB|
|Age Range:||9 - 12 Years|
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