Illumination Book Award Winner
Uplifting, practical and inspiring this award-winning Christian divorce recovery book has brightened the lives of countless readers who've experienced the life-altering pain of separation and divorce. Selected as an Exemplary Christian Self-Help/Recovery Book by the Illumination Book Awards, Peace After Divorce helps you understand how the devastation of divorce can be transformed into a positive new life.
In addition to sharing practical strategies for healing from divorce and coping with divorce on a day-to-day basis, counselor and Christian Renee Smith Ettline motivates and inspires. Your divorce may change who you are but this book will help you make sure it doesn't define who you are.
More than just providing information, the content helps you to:
- Work through emotions and thoughts;
- Deal with loneliness and divorce grief;
- Choose healing actions;
- Cope more effectively with your former spouse;
- Re-enter single life;
- Help children cope with separation and divorce;
- And much more.
You CAN find hope, peace, and joy after divorce. For personal use, Christian divorce support groups, or pastoral care. Christian divorce recovery curriculum and leader materials are available through After Divorce Ministries.
|Publisher:||Jesse Press, LLC|
|Product dimensions:||5.50(w) x 8.50(h) x 0.54(d)|
|Age Range:||18 Years|
About the Author
Renee Smith Ettline, founder of After Divorce Ministries, LLC, and her husband Fred Ettline, have led divorce support groups and church divorce ministries workshops for several years. Renee is a former counselor who worked with adults and students in college, industry, and school settings. She holds a M.Ed. in Student Personnel Services and over 30 hours of post-masters degree credit in counseling and guidance. Recognized as Outstanding Counselor of the Year, and honored for innovative programming, most of Renee's career has involved teaching life strategies and skills. She draws on her background as well as her Christian faith in the writing of this book. Fred is a retired college professor with an Ed. D. As single parent of two children, Fred was particularly helpful with the section of this book on helping children of divorce. Each previously divorced the Ettlines seek to help others find real-life strategies and God-given power to move beyond the lingering impact of divorce.
Table of Contents
|Chapter 1Take Charge||1|
|God, Divorce, and Me||6|
|Accepting Divorce as Reality||11|
|You Mean I'm Normal?||14|
|Navigating the Winds of Divorce||18|
|Highlights from Chapter 1||22|
|Chapter 2Seek Renewal||23|
|Moving from Acceptance to Renewal||24|
|Embracing a World of Change||30|
|Making Choices about Change||34|
|Missed the Best of Life?||42|
|Managing Daily Life||45|
|Opening a Direct Line to God||49|
|Highlights from Chapter 2||55|
|Chapter 3Untie the Emotional Knot||57|
|The Emotional Divorce vs. the Legal Divorce||58|
|What is Real||61|
|Feelings about Your Former Spouse||64|
|If I Just Knew Why||69|
|Speed Bumps, Potholes, and Roadblocks||72|
|Make a Defining Break||76|
|Highlights from Chapter 3||83|
|Chapter 4Look Inside||85|
|Guilt and Regrets||91|
|Rejection and Vulnerability||97|
|Loss and Grief||100|
|The Empty Love Pot||109|
|Joy and Laughter||113|
|Highlights from Chapter 4||117|
|Chapter 5Cast Away Stones||119|
|Anger with God versus Reliance on God||120|
|Stuck in a State of Done Wrong||123|
|Anger toward Your Former Spouse||131|
|Forgiving Your Former Spouse||138|
|Highlights from Chapter 5||142|
|Chapter 6Redirect Your Thoughts||143|
|The Power in Thoughts||144|
|Thoughts and Beliefs about God||149|
|Thoughts about Marriage and Divorce||154|
|Thoughts about Circumstances||159|
|Thoughts about Your Former Spouse||164|
|Highlights from Chapter 6||169|
|Chapter 7Choose Your Actions||171|
|Staying True to Yourself and God||172|
|Changing Dynamics with Your Former Spouse||175|
|Communicating with Your Former Spouse||182|
|Taking Care of Your Health||193|
|Helping Children Cope with Divorce||196|
|Highlights from Chapter 7||209|
|Chapter 8Consider What's Next||211|
|Where Are You Now?||212|
|Finding Purpose in Your Life||216|
|Finding Your Future||221|
|Before a New Romance||225|
|Creating Level Paths for Dating||233|
|Highlights from Chapter 8||240|
|Epilogue: Just the Beginning||242|
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
I waited almost 5 years after my divorce before reading this book. I was so surprised by the unresolved issues I still had. This book helped me address the surpressed pain and rekindle the healing process.
This book is very helpful for not only all the issues arriving from divorced situations but it also applies to other issues in life.
I loved this book. I found it very helpful while I was going through my divorce.
I bought this book hoping to help a friend who is going through a divorce. While I believe that marriages should never just end without doing everything possible to try to save it, I do understand that there are times when no matter what you do, the marriage is just over. This book has much more content than I expected. It is written using Biblical insight to help those going through a divorce, reminding the reader of the unwavering love of our Creator and Heavenly Father. It's nice to be reminded of this because I believe that people tend to forget there is hope during these difficult months/years. This book is set up like a workbook. It is not a book that the reader will pick up and finish in a day. The author suggests reading no more than one chapter a week. There are many questions to ponder in each chapter. To gain the most insight, the reader should read and answer the questions to really understand how they are feeling and how they are coping with the loss of their marriage. Then it gives great insight on how to change behaviors by the way you transform your thinking. At the end of each chapter, it lists the highlights so that you can go back over everything and really let it sink in. If you live in a community where there are no divorce support groups, then this book contains invaluable advice. If you can attend a divorce support group, I think that this can still be very helpful as it will give you a head's up on what to expect and how to avoid potential downfalls, especially when it comes to setting boundaries, dealing with children, and learning whether or not to get into another relationship. But most of all, this book reminds us that God loves us and He will always love us and want what's best for us. We need not be afraid to go to Him in these darkest times where we feel like failures.
I had no idea the pain would be so intense, physical and emotional. I thought everything I was feeling was exclusive to my experience. In this book, Renee walks through your experience with you (she's been there herself) and helps you to understand how the devastation that is your new reality can be transformed into something even better. Renee uses scripture in each chapter to give us strength and to know we are not alone. We've all had the experience of someone throwing a tired old scripture our way to make us feel better. It generally does the opposite. Renee takes God's beautiful words and shows us how they apply to today. Your divorce will change who you are but this book will help you make sure it doesn't define who you are. Remarkably, I was able to come to a place of forgiveness and acceptance. I pray that same peace for everyone considering this book.