Shutting Up: Listening to Your Employees, Leading by Example, and Maximizing Productivity

Shutting Up: Listening to Your Employees, Leading by Example, and Maximizing Productivity

by Eric Wagner
Shutting Up: Listening to Your Employees, Leading by Example, and Maximizing Productivity

Shutting Up: Listening to Your Employees, Leading by Example, and Maximizing Productivity

by Eric Wagner

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Overview

Hey, manager: please shut up already! Too many new managers, often promoted from the best of the front-line workers, lack the basic ability to interact effectively-speaking when they should be listening, and listening... well, not much. And when it comes to more advanced skills like improving worker performance, maximizing productivity, handling customers, and driving real success with their products, all bets are off. With no real background or training in management skills, today's managers-even with experience-too often struggle to engage with their teams, maximize performance, and achieve great results.

Here's the newer manager's greatest ally: a quick-start guide that rapidly and accessibly covers the essential skills that good managers need to lead their teams effectively. Building on the simplest possible foundation-Shut Up and Listen!-this guide collects over 250 hints, tips, and tricks developed by an experienced manager and leader over more than a quarter century of technical management. Take your management career from zero to sixty-or discover how to lead your team to the next level-with one quick and easy read.


Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781475998566
Publisher: iUniverse, Incorporated
Publication date: 08/19/2013
Pages: 228
Product dimensions: 6.00(w) x 9.00(h) x 0.52(d)

About the Author

Eric Wagner is the Sr VP of Engineering at Brivo Inc, an access control company in the Washington DC area, and a founding member of MindNest LLC, a technology incubator in Phoenix, Arizona. After beginning his career as a software engineer, he quickly rose into the ranks of management, where his style of listening to his employees, leading by example and consensus instead of decree, and finding simple ways to maximize results soon lead to positions of greater responsibility at internationally-known companies Autodesk and GoDaddy.com, culminating as the CTO of Pearson Digital Learning, a division of the world's leading academic and educational publisher. He regularly travels nationwide to appear as a keynote speaker at technology and educational events. Eric holds a Bachelor's Degree in Computer Science and a Master's Degree in Software Engineering from Arizona State University.

Read an Excerpt

SHUTTING UP

Listening to Your Employees, Leading by Example, and Maximizing Productivity


By Eric Wagner

iUniverse LLC

Copyright © 2013 Eric Wagner
All rights reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4759-9856-6



CHAPTER 1

Knowing When to Shut Up


We all know people who are so enamored with the sound of their own voices that it's impossible to get a word in edgewise. That's bad enough if you're trying to have an ordinary conversation, and it's worse if you're trying to collaborate with someone. So let's consider the single most important thing to do when you're communicating one-to-one, especially when you're communicating with subordinates at work: shut up.

What? You're the manager! That's true, and if you want to talk until the cows come home, no one who reports to you is likely to stop you. If you're trying to be an effective, respected manager, however, you must realize that what you have to say is much less valuable than anything your subordinates might have to say to you. But there's a problem:

People, by their nature, don't communicate.

Even under the best of circumstances, it can be incredibly difficult to get someone to open up and communicate freely. Many people have a natural distrust of their leadership that can only be overcome with many months, if not years, of positive contact. When your teams learn that you listen to them, you take their ideas to heart, you actively work to resolve their complaints, and you never simply lie to them outright, they will slowly come to trust your leadership. But this will never happen if you do not give them the opportunity to open their mouths in the first place.


So Shut Up Already!

Someone comes to you with a question, and you answer it. That seems simple enough, right? But the instinct to speak, to answer a question before it is completely asked—or before the real question has actually been asked at all—is as strong as the gravity emanating from a black hole. And just when we think we're being helpful, we're actually throwing away the most important potential of the conversation: useful feedback, a thoughtful idea, or helpful criticism. And we're quashing any chance we might have of eventually forming a trusted bond with that team member.

"But I let him ask the question!" you say. Did you really? Jumping in during (or immediately following) your visitor's initial monologue might make you feel like you've handled the situation well, but unless it really was an utterly simple question—"What time is that meeting again?"—your employee will leave your office feeling like the conversation was a waste of time. He didn't make the points he really wanted to make, and he didn't get to the true questions or problems that were bothering him.

And he isn't going to blame himself for that. He's going to blame you.

What you really need is the ability to hold your tongue. It is vital to let your employee speak until he has said everything he wants to say. When I'm having a discussion about anything even remotely more complicated than the time of day, I will usually do something to actively remind me to shut up—literally bite my tongue, sit on a hand, or clench my teeth together. I want my people to open up to me and give me all the ideas, comments, or criticisms that they have. And they'll never do it if I start "fixing" their problems before I find out what the problems really are.


One Mississippi, Two Mississippi ...

But shutting up isn't enough on its own. There's another critical element to listening: waiting for more. After your visitor has gotten through his points and he closes his mouth, delay opening your mouth even longer. You may find it hard to believe, but even at the point when you think it's your turn, chances are very good that your guest hasn't actually said everything on his mind. Whether it's an idea he thinks is a little too far out on the fringe, or a criticism that he thinks you might not want to hear, he hasn't brought it up yet.

This is when I use my rule of "Seven Mississippi." Yes: I literally start counting it out in my head. When you allow an awkward silence to fall over the discussion, your guest will start feeling like it's his obligation to get the dialogue going again. And then he'll start trying to figure out what the heck he can say next. Chances are, he will dive down into some of those as-yet-unsaid items he didn't cover initially. That's when he'll get to the sweet chewy center of what he really had to say in the first place.

I'll be the first to admit it: it can definitely feel a little funky to allow that silence to build over what seems like a seven-second eternity. But it's absolutely worth it when the other person starts talking again and you realize that now you're getting to the real meat of the matter.


Ask, Don't Tell

But sometimes "Seven Mississippi" isn't enough to get someone talking. Even though you've kept your mouth shut, even though you've waited, you may have the strong sensation that there is something left unsaid. In that case, you must nudge your guest to bring it out. So instead of jumping into your part of the discussion, ask a simple question that encourages your visitor to elaborate. Questions that begin with "Could you explain more about ..." or "Why do you feel that ..." will keep the focus on your guest, and with any luck he'll open the door to that fresh information.

I am rewarded nearly 100 percent of the time for this behavior. It's amazing how a simple clarifying question can lead to data that you never would have heard if you hadn't shut up and listened.


The Reward

It sometimes takes practice, and it always takes patience. But if you shut up long enough to listen long enough, and you use strategic questions to draw out more information, your people will eventually tell you whatever it is they need to say. And when they do, they will feel that the time with you was well spent. More importantly, they will want to repeat that experience in the future. And even more importantly than that, they will tell their coworkers about the experience, and that will make the rest of your team curious about trying it as well.


Broadening the Scope

Inasmuch as we are discussing shutting up with respect to dealing with our employees, we don't have to stop there. Shutting up works just as well with peers, bosses, other departments, and customers. When you use this approach on a grander scale, you will develop a reputation as someone who really listens. Others will initiate discussions with you more frequently. You'll hear more and better ideas, and you'll gather criticisms and counter-ideas that are critical for performing your duties to the best of your ability.

Active, intentional listening becomes the key foundation for many other management skills, especially ...

CHAPTER 2

Communicating One-On-One


In this chapter, we will target some of the many different types of dialogues that happen between two people, and we'll expose how to maximize the effectiveness of each. Every situation is different, and getting the most out of each conversation requires us to pay attention and tune our actions and responses to the needs of the discussion.


Inviting Communication

Let's begin our quest for excellent one-on-one communication with a look at whether your working setup is encouraging such conversations to occur. Whether you're based in a real, private office or some sort of cube or open-office structure, you can set things up to encourage folks to communicate with you on a frequent basis. Or you can send an unintentional but clear signal that you'd really rather not be bothered.


Your Office: Location, Location, Location ...

First off, consider the actual physical placement of your office or cube. Unfortunately, this may not always be totally in your control. Sometimes, upper management likes to have all the managers sit together—maybe close to the big boss. Sure, this makes it easy for him to find you when a choking is necessary. But think about it: Are the majority of your daily communications really with your boss and peers? I would take a hard look at myself if I spent more time each day with my boss and fellow managers than I did working with my own team.

If you do have the choice, sit as close to your team as you can. The opportunities for solid, ongoing communication with your team will be vastly improved. Sitting with my team makes it easier for them to see me as part of the team. And when I sit with my workers, instead of my fellow managers, it sends a message to my team that they are my priority, and not the higher-ups.

Plus, it makes it much easier for my folks to quickly stop by when they need to—or even for nothing more than a friendly hello. It can be a daunting task for an employee to walk over to "management row" for a conversation. If you move yourself out of convenient reach, that distance can easily turn into a good excuse for someone to talk himself out of trying to communicate with you. And never reside on a different floor than your team. Requiring someone to walk a bit is one thing, but stairs and elevators are like barbed-wire fences.

If you happen to be high enough in the food chain to have managers reporting to you, the same rule applies. Sit them close to their people. Remember that they should be working for their own teams just as much as they work for you, and resist the temptation to suck them into your own tight orbit.


... and Layout, Layout, Layout

Beyond the location of your office, consider its arrangement as well. Way back in the 1980s, I took a tip from a character on the television show Hill Street Blues. Captain Frank Furillo never let his desk stand between himself and his visitors. When someone came to see him, he would stand up and walk around his desk to have the discussion face-to-face. As a brand-new manager myself, I loved that approach and took serious note of it.

Thanks to today's prefabricated office furniture and its required layouts, you may not be able to position things exactly to your liking. But if you have some flexibility, try to set yourself up so that your desk isn't positioned as a barrier to everyone who walks in. If you have room for a separate table and chairs, where you can sit down together, you're good to go. But if you have no other seating available, and you can't avoid the desk-in-the-middle setup, do your best to remove its barrier potential. When you have visitors, slide your chair over to the end of the desk, so you're talking more around the desk than over it. Folks who visit with you will feel an increased connection with you.


Distractions

There's another benefit to positioning yourself away from your desk when you're meeting with someone: you probably won't end up anywhere near your computer. Nothing says, "I'm a Dingus, and everything else I have to do is more important than anything you've got to tell me," like continuing to work or checking your email while you pretend to entertain your visitor. Even a quick glance over to your computer screen is enough to send a clear message—you'd rather watch those stock quotes stream by than focus on the conversation. Reduce the temptation to cheat by hitting the screen lock or screen-saver key when you're about to start. Then scoot away from the computer screen. Now you're telling your guest that you're really working with him right now.

And don't even think about fiddling with your cell phone!


Your Cube: Finding Privacy

If you're in a cubicle, you're located reasonably close to your workers, and you've set up the best layout you can, there's not much more you can do physically to show your team that you want to hear from them whenever they have the need. But what happens when one of your people wants to discuss a sensitive issue? It's pretty tough to have that conversation in the open-ish cube environment.

So how do you handle it? You can't require folks to schedule a formal meeting with you every time they need to handle a quick issue. As soon as you do that, you've pretty much lost the game. Instead, have a private area close by where you can retreat whenever a discussion starts turning sensitive. Fortunately, in cube-heavy office designs, there are usually a number of small conference rooms scattered around. The trick is to make sure that at least some of those rooms are not bookable with your company's meeting-management or calendar system. Instead, leave them perpetually free for quick, impromptu conversations, and let your people know why they're there. If your workers know that you'll be able to head to a private room when the conversation turns sensitive, they won't have any excuse not to initiate the dialogue.


Your Office: The Open Door

If you have a true office, that solves the privacy problem—you can close the door anytime. But the enhanced privacy may create other issues. Like that door itself.

Look at your office door. Is its normal position open or closed? When you enter your office, do you automatically close the door behind you? Not good! It doesn't matter if you put a sign on the door that says, "I'm always available! Enter!" It doesn't matter if your entire office is windowed and everyone can see what you're doing. That closed office door is a high-decibel announcement to your troops that will kill your communication, regardless of your intentions. If stairs and elevators between you and your team are like barbed wire, a closed door is the Berlin Wall.

Instead, leave that door open virtually all the time. Yes: even when you're working on a task that requires concentration, and you'd rather not be disturbed. It is more valuable to be disturbed by someone who has decided he wants to communicate with you. If you need privacy and concentration to finish some big project, then come in early, stay late, or lock yourself in your study at home. Your office is a place for interaction with your team, not privacy.

Of course, you can close the door when circumstances require it. If you're holding a meeting and need the privacy, or if the meeting is making too much noise and might distract the rest of your team, then by all means close it up. In general, however, remember that a closed door is a barrier to success. Keep that barrier removed whenever possible.


The Conversation: One Goal, Multiple Personalities

Working with your team, you're going to come across numerous different personalities and situations. Treating every person and conversation the same way—even two different conversations with the same person—is a recipe for disaster.

So when someone sits down in your office and the conversation starts, shut up and listen. And while you're shutting up, identify the type of situation you're in and prepare to respond accordingly.

In this section, we'll talk about a few possibilities.


The Nervous Wreck

Most of your team will become accustomed to meeting with you in your office or in some other one-on-one situation. Your boss, your peers, and your direct reports will expect to meet with you privately as a matter of course. However, if you have managers reporting to you, you will most likely have occasions when you'd like to speak privately with one of their reports.

For some of these frontline workers, going to your office for a meeting—or knowing that they'll be meeting privately with you, at your request—can be an unnerving experience. Yes, they'll get used to you eventually, but the first few times you schedule a private talk with them they're going to be really worried about what they did wrong. Depending on the circumstances, even members of your own direct team may sometimes have the jitters.

When you have a potential Nervous Wreck on your hands, you need to go out of your way to get the person comfortable—even before the meeting starts. First, when you send the meeting invitation, be clear about the purpose. Never schedule a one-on-one talk without providing an agenda. Better yet, stop by the person's cube and chat for a minute before you even send the invitation. Then let him know that you'd like to schedule an official meeting to continue the discussion.

Despite your best efforts, you won't always be able to convince people of the innocent nature of an impending meeting. Even if you're clear about the topic, people might still believe that you're diverting attention from the real reason that you want to talk—maybe it's a reprimand, or even termination! If you believe that your guest may still have some major concern, get to the subject right away. "Thanks for coming. This XYZ project really needs our attention."

The same technique is doubly important when you have to call someone in for a discussion without having a chance to set him up for it. If you call and ask him to come to your office right away, he'll be plenty sweaty when he arrives. Set him at ease as quickly as you can. "Hey! Come on in. Nothing bad is going on here. We just need to talk about the XYZ project." You will notice an immediate change in demeanor.


The Venter

It's guaranteed that your employees will get upset from time to time. Someone will show up at your door, you'll see him walking in the halls with that look on his face, or another team member will alert you that he seems to be distressed about something. Eventually, that someone will arrive in your office for a chat. The next few minutes will determine whether he gets past the problem and back to work, or he stews on it—and maybe even gets others incited and diverted from their own work.
(Continues...)


Excerpted from SHUTTING UP by Eric Wagner. Copyright © 2013 Eric Wagner. Excerpted by permission of iUniverse LLC.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.

Table of Contents

Contents

Acknowledgments....................     ix     

Introduction: The Dingus....................     1     

Chapter 1: Knowing When to Shut Up....................     13     

Chapter 2: Communicating One-On-One....................     17     

Chapter 3: Communicating with the Group....................     43     

Chapter 4: Managing Performance....................     71     

Chapter 5: Working with the Team....................     93     

Chapter 6: Making Decisions....................     117     

Chapter 7: Making Estimates....................     127     

Chapter 8: Maximizing Productivity....................     141     

Chapter 9: GOOOOAAAALLLL!!!!....................     149     

Chapter 10: Maintaining Perspective....................     161     

Chapter 11: Getting Respect....................     167     

Chapter 12: Managing the Boss....................     185     

Chapter 13: Beyond the Team....................     195     

Chapter 14: Summing It All Up....................     215     

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