Sunday Dinners, Moonshine and Men

by Tate Barkley

Overview

Tate Barkley grew up in the small towns of North Carolina, where money was tight, dreams seldom came true, and family secrets were kept hidden. His Grandmother's house was a sanctuary where he felt loved—and her big Sunday dinners nourished his stomach and soul.

After his parents divorced, he discovered his mother's new boyfriend, and eventual husband, was his biological father—a charming dreamer who would disappear for months at a time, leaving his family to fend for themselves.

As a teen, Tate began drinking. His father was a heavy drinker, and Tate was always looking for ways to connect with him and hold on to the moment before he slipped away again. Drinking gave Tate a sense of calm, and it numbed him from the love he was missing in his life. After years of drinking, losing his law practice, and hitting rock bottom, he realized he either needed to take responsibility and change—or he'd end up dead.

This is a Southern boy's story of surviving in a good ole boys' world. Tate fought his way back, ended a life built on lies, and forged a path to accept his true self—with or without his father's love.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781953321220
Publisher:	Micro Publishing Media
Publication date:	09/25/2023
Pages:	260
Product dimensions:	6.00(w) x 9.00(h) x (d)

About the Author

For years Tate Barkley lived in shame—of living in poverty, of alcoholism and addiction, of being a closeted gay man. His story may sound familiar to anyone struggling to feel "less than." Now sober through Alcoholics Anonymous, he wants to share his story, hoping it will help others leave their shame behind and discover the peace they deserve.

His memoir, Sunday Dinners, Moonshine, and Men, recounts Tate's troubled relationship with his father, his journey to overcome shame, and the scarcity mindset that blocked his ability to find peace. Tate offers readers a deeply personal account of his dysfunctional childhood, from the backwoods of North Carolina to his family's struggles with poverty in Central Florida and their ultimate move to the boomtown of 1970s Houston, Texas. He details his attempts to repress his sexuality and control his escalating drinking as he became a successful attorney, only to hit rock bottom and lose it all. Tate's story will resonate with readers as they follow his quest to accept himself and find the promise of serenity sobriety brings.

Tate is a practicing attorney, speaker, author, and educator, living in Houston, Texas, with his husband of six years, Anson, and their dog, Emerson.

Editorial Reviews

09/25/2023

In a relaxed, inviting style, Barkley recounts facing poverty, absentee parenting, and alcoholism as he came of age in small-town North Carolina before eventually embracing and coming to terms with his beloved but domineering, homophobic father. Barkley’s portrait of financial hardship—the family often depended on the graciousness of neighbors, utility bills were often in arrears, and the next meal was never assured—and eventual success is engaging, as is his account of discovering and later kicking alcohol. “I loved the courage that coursed through me as I eased into my first deep beer buzz,” he writes, of his first sip, adding, “Frankly, I’ve chased that feeling the rest of my life."

Barkley paints, in vivid and touching detail, his torment as a repressed gay man at the dawn of the AIDS era, and how, as he grew older, his drinking drove him toward the edge of total ruin. Throughout, uncertainty about who he is and who he should be powers the narrative, with heartbreaking moments like leaving bars with women for whom he felt no attraction just so that people would see he had done so, and feeling “kicked in the stomach” at a 1980 campaign event, at Ronald Reagan’s insistence that a gay “culture and lifestyle is harmful to our people and our country.” Only after losing his house, his friend, and his business in a legal profession where word-of-mouth matters does he begin to seriously consider seeking help for his drinking.

Even as an openly gay man, five years sober and able at last to establish and protect healthy relationships, Barkley still faces a daunting challenge: coming out to his father, “larger than life, formidable, and bulletproof,” who once ran moonshine and had long been Barkley’s favorite drinking buddy. The memoir alternates between the coming-of-age-narrative and Barkley going to see his father in the hospital after a heart attack. Barkley builds to this encounter with grace and power but telling his story in a voice so conversational you can almost hear the accent. This is a gripping, touching read.

Takeaway: Touching story of coming out and finding sobriety after a hard southern childhood.

Comparable Titles: Paul Monette’s Becoming a Man, Kevin Jennings’s Mama's Boy, Preacher’s Son.

Production grades Cover: A Design and typography: A Illustrations: N/A Editing: A Marketing copy: A

BookLife Reviews