Teach Your Children Well: Parenting for Authentic Success

Teach Your Children Well: Parenting for Authentic Success

by Madeline Levine PhD


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Psychologist Madeline Levine, author of the New York Times bestseller The Price of Privilege, brings together cutting-edge research and thirty years of clinical experience to explode once and for all the myth that good grades, high test scores, and college acceptances should define the parenting endgame.

Teach Your Children Well is a toolbox for parents, providing information, relevant research and a series of exercises to help parents clarify a definition of success that is in line with their own values as well as their children’s interests and abilities. Teach Your Children Well is a must-read for parents, educators, and therapists looking for tangible tools to help kids thrive in today’s high-stakes, competitive culture.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780061824746
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Publication date: 07/24/2012
Pages: 352
Product dimensions: 6.30(w) x 9.00(h) x 1.30(d)

About the Author

Madeline Levine, PhD, is a clinician, consultant, and educator; the author of the New York Times bestseller The Price of Privilege; and a cofounder of Challenge Success, a project of the Stanford School of Education that addresses education reform, student well-being,and parent education. She lives outside San Francisco with her husband and is the proud mother of three newly minted adult sons.

Table of Contents

Introduction Courageous Parenting-Taking the Long View xiii

Part 1 Authentic Success: It's Not About Bleeding Hearts Versus Tiger Moms 1

Chapter 1 The Kids Are Not Alright (and Neither Are Their Parents) 3

Chapter 2 How Did We Get into This Mess? 23

Part 2 The "School Years" are Not Just About Academics: A Primer on Child Development 43

Chapter 3 The Tasks of the Elementary School Years: Ages 5-11 45

Learning How to Make Friends and Be a Friend 49

Becoming Competent and Excited About Learning 59

Developing a Sense of Self: Who Am I? 69

Becoming an Empathic Person 73

Remembering to Play 79

General Recommendations for Parenting Your Elementary School Age Child 84

Chapter 4 The Tasks of the Middle School Years: Ages 11-14 89

Navigating Puberty 93

Staying Healthy 103

Building Independence 120

Building a Peer Group 129

Note to Parents 144

Chapter 5 The Tasks of the High School Years: Ages 14-18 145

Becoming an Adult Thinker 148

Learning to Manage Sexuality 159

Building a Sense of Identity 167

Developing Autonomy 174

Part 3 The Resilience Factor: Seven Essential Coping Skills 185

Chapter 6 Teaching Our Kids to Find Solutions 189

Resourcefulness: "I can handle this" instead of "Mom …" 189

Enthusiasm: "I love this" instead of "Whatever" 194

Creativity: "Let's look at this differently" not "What's the right answer?" 201

A Good Work Ethic: "I'm going to keep at it" instead of "I quit" 209

Chapter 7 Teaching Our Kids to Take Action 217

Self-Control: "It just doesn't feel right" instead of "All the kids are doing it" 217

Self-Esteem: "I feel good about myself" instead of "I suck" 225

Self-Efficacy: "I can make a difference" instead of "Nothing I do matters" 232

Part 4 Walking the Talk 241

Chapter 8 Defining and Living Your Family Values: A Paper and Pencil Exercise 243

What Are Your Core Values? 248

Family Values Statement 252

Your Guiding Principles 254

The Family Action Plan 255

Chapter 9 Editing the Script: Becoming the Parents We Want to Be 261

Denial: "Problem? What problem?" 266

Projection: "Yeah, they've got a problem, not me" 271

Peer Pressure: It's Not Just for Teenagers 275

Is Parenting Hereditary? "I can't believe I sound just like my mother" 282

The Trinity of Change: Self-Reflection, Empathy, and Flexibility 286

Acknowledgments 299

Notes 303

Index 311

What People are Saying About This

Ned Hallowell

“A fantastic, on-point, desperately needed book! If you have children or care about children or care about the future of this country and the world, read this book.”

David Elkind

“With keen insight and telling examples, Levine offers suggestions for adopting a more balanced idea of success that requires changing deeply ingrained habits but is well worth the effort.”

Daniel H. Pink

“Madeline Levine’s voice is a welcome antidote to the Tiger-Momming of America. [Teach Your Children Well] is packed with smart and savvy advice for raising independent, productive, and well-adjusted young people. Read this book—your kids will thank you.”

Kenneth R. Ginsburg

“For the sake of the adults of tomorrow, I hope that Teach Your Children Well becomes a must-read and must-discuss book for parents today.”

Judith Warner

“Levine really comes into her own . . . when she moves beyond child development to concentrate instead on parent development, exploring why we do the misguided things we do, and asking how we must (as we must) change ourselves and behave differently.”

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Teach Your Children Well: Parenting for Authentic Success 5 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 4 reviews.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
After being a parent for 10 years and after feeling increasingly stressed about my parenting techniques, decisions, strategies and my children's future, I was lucky to read Madline Levine's article in NY Times a few weeks ago which led me to this book. This is a fantastiic guide to parenting that puts the whole concept of parenting in a different and truly authentic perspective. Mrs. Levine with her easy to read jargon-free writing put an end to all my uncertainties and endless anxiety about my children's up brining by questioning the current standars of success which are truly flawed. I need to go back and read the book, particularly the last two chapters, again. This is a must read guide for every parent who strives for authenticly successful children and family no matter how old the children are. Mrs. Levine, thank you for your superbly written book and for sharing your knowledge and experiences as a professional and as a parent with the rest of us. Teaching Your Children Well is the light that all of us need as we try to navigate and find the right path for ourselves and our children everyday.
LovesToReadSF More than 1 year ago
I highly recommend this book to anyone who is looking for thoughtful advice on how to raise a well-balanced child in our hectic world. Dr. Levine reminds us of what's truly important when it comes to raising children: loving them for who they are as individuals vs. what we want them to be; allowing them to experience both the ups and downs of life in order to build resilience; and making time to connect with them during the simple, everyday moments as opposed to always running from activity to activity. Her words of wisdom encourage us to focus on raising kids who will grow up to be well-rounded and capable adults, rather than figuring out how to get them into accelerated classes or running interference for them when they are faced with the inevitable challenges of life. A fabulous read for parents and educators alike!!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
MomsChoiceAwards More than 1 year ago
Teach Your Children Well is a recipient of the prestigious Mom's Choice Award. The Mom’s Choice Awards honors excellence in family-friendly media, products and services. An esteemed panel of judges includes education, media and other experts as well as parents, children, librarians, performing artists, producers, medical and business professionals, authors, scientists and others. A sampling of the panel members includes: Dr. Twila C. Liggett, ten-time Emmy-winner, professor and founder of PBS’s Reading Rainbow; Julie Aigner-Clark, Creator of Baby Einstein and The Safe Side Project; Jodee Blanco, New York Times best-selling Author and; LeAnn Thieman, motivational speaker and coauthor of seven Chicken Soup For The Soul books. Parents and educators look for the Mom’s Choice Awards seal in selecting quality materials and products for children and families.