That is as false as false can be. If you want to live happily ever after and skip through each day with a light, carefree heart; read this terrifying book and discover the true secret of life.
But be warned. If you do read it, and you choose to ignore the lessons it contains, you will find yourself in terrible danger. And if you don't read it, you'll be in even more trouble. So you'd better read it.
Hopefully in good but more likely in bad,
Sir Jasper Gowlings
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