Texts from Mittens is a series of text message conversations between a snappy, self-absorbed housecat named Mittens and his long-suffering human, a single woman who works away from home during the day. Mittens relentlessly hassles his human all day long, while only taking breaks to watch Judge Judy, hang with his best friend Stumpy, complain about the antics of Drunk Patty the neighbor, ask Grandma for money to buy useless items from QVC, and harass the "filthy beast" dog, Phil.
Angie Bailey is an award-winning writer and blogger, humorist, and professional member of the Cat Writers' Association. Her primary blog, Catladyland, has won many awards, and her humor writing is featured nearly daily on Catster.com, one of the most popular cat sites on the Web. She loves to photograph her cats in silly poses and sleeps with one eye open. And yes, she has three cats.
"Each installment of Texts From Mittens is like a little gift to brighten your day!" Kate Benjamin, Hauspanther founder and co-author of Catification with Jackson Galaxy
"Texts From Mittens makes me wish my cat had thumbs! This is a hilarious book; Angie Bailey has done it again!" Jeremy Greenberg, Author of Sorry I Barfed on Your Bed
"We all knew that cats were hilarious, but Ms. Bailey's sardonic cat quips really take their mannerisms, attitude and occasional apathy to another level." Susan Michals, Curator of Cat Art Show Los Angeles
Come home! There's an emergency!
What?? Are you OK?
My dish is half empty!
I'll be home soon.
You wish starvation upon me!
Stop being dramatic.
Am weeak. Caan hasrdly tyyppe.
Are you going to wear those black pants on your bed?
Yes. I have a date.
Mittens, get off my pants!
FYI: Poly-blend makes your butt look big
|Product dimensions:||6.00(w) x 7.90(h) x 0.60(d)|
About the Author
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
Ms. Bailey knows cats and cat humor. I read the daily "Texts from Mittens" off Facebook and my husband and I can so relate! Anyone who has had a cat, or cats, can appreciate the humor. I hope in another year or so, there will be another book!
Each page in this book contains timed screenshots from the Furizon phone used by Mittens, a cat with serious keyboard skills. Mitty is conversing via text message with her owner, decrying the smell of her dog brother, the behavior of a not entirely sober human neighbor, the vagaries of Judge Judy, and the nature of a nice new Pinterest account. Some of the threads are laugh-out-loud funny. Others fit the imagined humor of cats and bathroom jokes of dogs. I could have wished the seasons followed more logically along the timeline, but that’s just ‘cause I insisted on reading the whole book at once. It’s a book to leave on the coffee table and dip into. Just don’t let your own cat get ideas. Disclosure: My son bought it for my mum, and Mum correctly predicted that I’d enjoy it too.
The world has been blessed with another kitty comedy from Angie Bailey. You might already know Mittens from Catster and his Facebook page. If so, you know he spends a LOT of time texting. Now you can get a whole book full of his conversations in "Texts From Mittens: A Cat Who Has an Unlimited Data Plan...and Isn't Afraid to Use It." If you don't know Mittens, this is a great intro. If you're the type of person who doesn't enjoy LOLCat humor, don't worry. Neither does Mittens. In fact in one of his texts he says, "I just saw some (LOLCats) online. Their spelling and grammar are deplorable!" You might even find yourself needing a dictionary to look up a word he uses. You may also see a little of your own life in the texts, like when Mitty is texting with his Mom because she has him locked out of her room and he is sticking his paw under the door. Do you feel like your cat is barely tolerating your dog? If he's anything like Mittens, you're probably right. Page 20 has my favorite text: Mittens asking for a little Hazmat suit to protect him from Phil the dog's breath. It's a cute, short, funny read. I recommend it to all cat lovers.