The CBT Workbook for Perfectionism: Evidence-Based Skills to Help You Let Go of Self-Criticism, Build Self-Esteem, and Find Balance

by Sharon Martin MSW, LCSW, Julie de Azevedo Hanks PhD, LCSW (Foreword by)

Overview

If you feel an intense pressure to be perfect, this evidence-based workbook offers real strategies based in cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) to help you develop a more balanced and healthy perspective.

Do you hold yourself—and perhaps others—to extremely high standards? Do you procrastinate certain tasks because you’re afraid you won’t carry them out perfectly? If you’ve answered “yes” to one or both of these questions, chances are you’re a perfectionist. And while there’s nothing wrong with hard work and high standards, perfectionism can also take over your life if you let it. So, how can you find balance?

With this workbook, you’ll identify the causes of your perfectionism and the ways it is negatively impacting your life. Rather than measuring your self-worth by productivity and accomplishments, you’ll learn to exercise self-compassion, and extend that compassion to others. You’ll also learn ways to prioritize the things that really matter to you, without focusing on attaining fixed goals.

Life isn’t perfect, and neither are we. If you’re ready to break free from out-of-control perfectionism and start living a richer, fuller life, this workbook will help you get started.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781684031535
Publisher:	New Harbinger Publications
Publication date:	01/02/2019
Pages:	240
Sales rank:	130,770
Product dimensions:	8.00(w) x 10.00(h) x 0.52(d)

About the Author

Sharon Martin, MSW, LCSW, is a psychotherapist, writer, speaker, and media contributor on emotional health and relationships. Her psychotherapy practice in San Jose, CA, specializes in helping individuals overcome codependency and perfectionism, and learn to accept and love themselves.

Foreword writer Julie de Azevedo Hanks, PhD, LCSW, is a psychotherapist, licensed clinical social worker, author of The Burnout Cure and The Assertiveness Guide for Women, and founder and director of Wasatch Family Therapy.

Table of Contents

Foreword v

Acknowledgments vii

Introduction 1

1 What Is Perfectionism? 5

2 What Perfectionism Looks Like in Your Life 13

3 Uncovering the Roots of Your Perfectionism 33

4 From Fear to Courage 51

5 From Self-Criticism to Self-Compassion 65

6 From Procrastinating to Getting Things Done 87

7 From Busy to Mindfully Present 105

8 From People-Pleasing to Being Assertive 131

9 From Anger to Peace 147

10 From Criticizing to Accepting Others 161

11 From Guilt to Self-Care 177

12 From Shame to Connection 191

13 Putting It All Together 203

Appendix A Cognitive Distortions 215

Appendix B Questions for Challenging Perfectionist Thinking 217

Appendix C Feeling Words 219

Appendix D Self-Care Activities 223

References 225

Interviews

Martin resides in San Jose, CA.

Editorial Reviews

“This workbook redefines what it means to work through your stuff. It’s chock-full of activities that help you really think about what you want to change AND gets you actively moving towards the change you want to see. The workbook takes you from understanding perfectionism to navigating the tough road to recovering from perfectionism to being able to live a life without the guilt and people-pleasing that come from being a perfectionist. And while many workbooks claim to do this, the way Sharon has crafted this workbook shows you step by practical step how to succeed at making this a solid transition. Professionals will love working with this book in their practices, and clients will love working through their perfectionism with such a useful guide.”
—Mercedes Samudio, LCSW, parent coach, and best-selling author of Shame-Proof Parenting

Mercedes Samudio

“Many people struggle with perfectionism whether it’s in our workplaces, in relationships, or the battle within ourselves. And many books talk about its root causes and how perfectionism affects the human psyche. But rarely do books offer ways to address perfectionism. In The CBT Workbook for Perfectionism, Sharon Martin offers practical, concrete, research-driven ways to let go of struggles like self-criticism, procrastination, people-pleasing, and the need for control. A must-read for anyone whose potential has been hindered by perfectionism.”
—Melvin Varghese, PhD, psychologist, and founder of Selling The Couch

Melvin Varghese

“Perfectionists, procrastinators, and people-pleasers take note. There is a new book available that can change how you live your life! The CBT Workbook for Perfectionism by Sharon Martin is more than a book; it’s a program. If you find yourself caught up in self-criticism and self-judgment, struggling with deadlines, or sabotaging your own success, you will find enormous comfort and guidance in this well-thought-out, highly structured workbook.”
—Jonice Webb, PhD, nationally recognized pioneer in the area of childhood emotional neglect, and best-selling author of Running on Empty and Running on Empty No More

Jonice Webb

“I’m a big fan of workbooks because they allow the reader to become an active participant in their self-help efforts. Sharon Martin’s contribution to help people fight perfectionism is a fantastic antidote to getting perfectionism’s maladaptive behaviors better under control. Martin offers a direct and no-nonsense look at perfectionism that eschews psychobabble, pulling together techniques in a cohesive and sensible manner. This workbook works well as either an adjunct to psychotherapy, or as a stand-alone guide to those in need of help of silencing the perfectionist in themselves. There’s no better book on the market that offers such practical advice and exercises for someone who wants better control over their perfectionism.”
—John M. Grohol, PsyD, founder and editor-in-chief of www.psychcentral.com

John M. Grohol

“Perfectionism can be paralyzing, but Sharon Martin gives you a road map to reclaim your life. Sharon expertly guides you to down a path to self-discovery, and arms you with exercises to find mental and emotional freedom. For lifelong high achievers, The CBT Workbook for Perfectionism is a must-have companion that will help you embrace imperfect action and reach your goals with less stress.”
—Melody Wilding, LMSW, peak performance coach, and adjunct professor of human behavior at The City University of New York

Melody Wilding

“Sharon Martin has been a trusted resource for my clinical work for years. She has a way of breaking down complex topics into understandable explanations, which makes them easier to understand and address. This workbook is no exception. She clearly explains what perfectionism is, how it shows up in our lives, where it comes from, and what we can do to change the perfectionistic behavior, which can be so problematic in our lives. This workbook includes so many effective strategies to help those of us who struggle because of perfectionism, and I plan to use it in my individual work with clients as well as with groups. I highly recommend this book to clinicians and the general public alike.”
—Laura Reagan, LCSW-C, integrative trauma therapist, and host of the Therapy Chat podcast

Laura Reagan