The Funniest People in Books: 250 Anecdotes

The Funniest People in Books: 250 Anecdotes

by David Bruce

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Some sample anecdotes: 1) Simon and Schuster once published a children’s book titled Dr. Dan the Bandage Man. As a publicity gimmick, they decided to include a half-dozen band-aids in each book, so publisher Richard Simon sent this telegram to a friend at Johnson and Johnson: “PLEASE SHIP TWO MILLION BAND-AIDS IMMEDIATELY.” The following day Mr. Simon received this telegram in reply: “BAND-AIDS ON THEIR WAY. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO YOU?” 2) As a young woman, ballerina Margot Fonteyn wished to educate herself and so she read many books, including James Joyce’s 'Ulysses,' which was banned in Britain when she read it. While she was reading the novel on a bus, Ninette De Valois asked what she was reading, then almost had a heart attack after seeing the title. She told young Margot, “For God’s sake, child, don’t read that in public—you could be arrested!” 3) When visiting Robert Graves, comedian Terry-Thomas felt that perhaps he had offended the famous poet with his sense of over-confidence, because instead of having an intellectual discussion about Greek mythology, all Mr. Graves talked to him about was compost, frequently stick-ing a fork into various maturing piles and making Terry-Thomas smell them.

Product Details

BN ID: 2940032833383
Publisher: David Bruce
Publication date: 10/25/2011
Series: The Funniest People in Books , #1
Sold by: Smashwords
Format: NOOK Book
File size: 178 KB

About the Author

I would like to see my retellings of classic literature used in schools, so I give permission to the country of Finland (and all other countries) to buy one copy of this eBook and give copies to all students forever. I also give permission to the state of Texas (and all other states) to buy one copy of this eBook and give copies to all students forever. I also give permission to all teachers to buy one copy of this eBook and give copies to all students forever. Teachers need not actually teach my retellings. Teachers are welcome to give students copies of my eBooks as background material. For example, if they are teaching Homer’s “Iliad” and “Odyssey,” teachers are welcome to give students copies of my “Virgil’s ‘Aeneid’: A Retelling in Prose” and tell students, “Here’s another ancient epic you may want to read in your spare time.” I also write collections of anecdotes; most of the anecdotes are funny or at least interesting, while some provoke thinking. Libraries, download my books free. This is from Smashwords' FAQ section: "Does Smashwords distribute to libraries? "Yes! We have two methods of distributing to libraries: 1. Via library aggregators. Library aggregators, such as OverDrive and Baker & Taylor's Axis360 service, allow libraries to purchase books. Smashwords is working with multiple library aggregators, and is in the process of signing up additional aggregators. 2. On August 7, 2012, Smashwords announced Library Direct. This distribution option allows libraries and library networks to acquire and host Smashwords ebooks on their own servers. This option is only available to libraries who place large "opening collection" orders, typically in the range of $20,000-$50,000, and the libraries must have the ability to host and manage the books, and apply industry-standard DRM to manage one-checkout-at-a-time borrows. To learn more about these library distribution options, visit your Dashboard's Channel Manager." David Bruce is a retired anecdote columnist at "The Athens News" in Athens, Ohio. He has also retired from teaching English at Ohio University in Athens, Ohio.

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