"Rogers-Seitz's memoir leads the reader through the murky depths of a psyche confronted with unthinkable tragedy. Her approach to the material borders on the poetically abstract while retaining a clear sense of meaning ... Acutely and emotionally observant, the author possesses a rare ability to pinpoint and convey the debilitating emotions and sensations associated with intense grief ... a profoundly moving debut that may offer solace to others grieving the loss of a child. Expressive, courageous writing that wrests insight from the depths of grief." - Kirkus Reviews
"An epic journey filled with bravery in each word of raw emotion." - Kids and Car Safety
"A heart-wrenching and inspiring journey through trauma, grief, and forgiveness. I couldn't put it down." - Brian Cuban, Author of The Addicted Lawyer: Tales of The Bar, Booze, Blow, and Redemption
"The Gift of Ben is a searing, powerful memoir about justice, injustice, love, healing, and perhaps most important and surprising, what happens when a woman forgives a tragic mistake that society thinks she should not. This is a book that will make you rethink everything you thought you knew about forgiveness." - Kerry Egan, Bestselling author of On Living and Fumbling
"Broken, poetic, brave. Inspired by her beautiful boy, a grieving mother confronts the unthinkable and fights for her family. In The Gift of Ben, Lindsey Rogers-Seitz reconciles joy and sorrow, wellbeing and mental illness to discover true unconditional love for her family in heaven and on earth, and finally, for herself. - Michele Gay, Co-founder of Safe and Sound Schools, mother of Josephine Grace Gay (7), Sandy Hook, CT
"Lindsey Rogers-Seitz has written a must-read for anyone who is looking to dive deeper into understanding our mental health epidemic and the journey of unimaginable grief. Her authentic and raw writing style beautifully captures the delicate balance needed to find hope amongst the shattered lives left behind after an unthinkable loss. This is a book that will change you." - Jen Marr, Author, Founder and CEO of Inspiring Comfort LLC
2023-04-08
Following the death of her child, Rogers-Seitz searches for hope in this debut memoir.
The author’s 15-month-old son, Ben, died when his father forgot to drop him off at day care, leaving him in a swelteringly hot car. The author, a lawyer who had struggled with mental illness for much of her life, describes her slow, “meticulous unraveling” that followed. Two months after Ben’s death, Rogers-Seitz sought out the “purity and peace” of Colorado with the hope of finding her “way back to Ben.” The author recounts how her journey turned her into an “experimenter”; experiences during a reiki session suggested the possibility that there could be a “pathway” to Ben, which in turn led her to meditation. The breakthroughs she experienced following this practice allowed her to feel “the beauty of being alive,” a sense of forgiveness, and a reconnection with God. Rogers-Seitz’s memoir leads the reader through the murky depths of a psyche confronted with unthinkable tragedy. Her approach to the material borders on the poetically abstract while retaining a clear sense of meaning: “My mind fell out of itself when I finally heard the words ‘He didn’t make it.’ ” Acutely and emotionally observant, the author possesses a rare ability to pinpoint and convey the debilitating emotions and sensations associated with intense grief: “My body is lead; I am glued to the ground. I am becoming the ground and the stucco wall behind me. It is scratching my back. I am lost.” The narrative arc of the memoir from darkness to light is emphasized by an effervescence that enters the prose when Rogers-Seitz finds hope through meditation: “A pinpoint light. I concentrated on the luminescence. I’ll call it my angel, I thought. My angel is light.” This memoir may not resonate with metaphysical skeptics, as the author’s road to hope is founded on a firm belief in the spiritual realm. However, this remains a profoundly moving debut that may offer solace to others grieving the loss of a child.
Expressive, courageous writing that wrests insight from the depths of grief.
