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The Overparenting Epidemic: Why Helicopter Parenting Is Bad for Your Kids . . . and Dangerous for You, Too!

The Overparenting Epidemic: Why Helicopter Parenting Is Bad for Your Kids . . . and Dangerous for You, Too!

by George S. Glass M.D., David Tabatsky

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Helicopter parents, tiger moms, cosseters, hothouse parents . . .

Whatever we label it, overparenting—anxious, invasive, overly attentive, and competitive parenting—may have finally backfired. As we witness the first generation of overparented children becoming adults in their own right, many studies show that when baby boomer parents intervene inappropriately––with too much advice, excessive favors, and erasing obstacles that kids should negotiate themselves––their “millennial” children end up ill-behaved, anxious, narcissistic, entitled youths unable to cope with everyday life. The obsession with providing everything a child could possibly need, from macrobiotic cupcakes to 24/7 tutors, has created epidemic levels of depression and stress in our country’s youth, but this can be avoided if parents would just take a giant step back, check their ambitions at the door, and do what’s really best for their kids.

Written by a noted psychiatrist and a parenting specialist, The Overparenting Epidemic is a science-based yet humorous and practical book that features an easy-to-read menu of pragmatic, reasonable advice for how to parent children effectively and lovingly without overdoing it, especially in the context of today’s demanding world.

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Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781629140827
Publisher: Skyhorse
Publication date: 11/11/2014
Format: NOOK Book
Pages: 240
File size: 1 MB

About the Author

George S. Glass, MD, has served as a medical doctor and board-certified psychiatrist for over thirty years. He received a BA in psychology from Swarthmore College and a medical degree from Northwestern University Medical School in Chicago, and he did his psychiatric residency at Yale University Medical School. He has served as associate professor of psychiatry at Baylor College of Medicine, University of Texas Medical School, and Cornell Weill School of Medicine. He lives in Houston, Texas.

David Tabatsky has coauthored several books, including Chicken Soup for the Soul’s The Cancer Book and the forthcoming Beautiful Old Dogs: A Loving Tribute to Our Senior Best Friends. He lives in New York City.

Table of Contents

A "Quick-Start" Guide ix

Disclaimer xi

Glossary xiii

Introduction xvii

Chapter 1 Arc You Overparenting? 1

How Do You Know whether You Are Overparenting? 4

A Color Code for Parents 7

Parenting Archetypes 9

Hands On/Hands Off 34

Less Protection, More Communication 36

Chapter 2 Why Twenty-First-Century Parenting Seems So Hard 39

What to Expect When Everyone Is Telling You What to Expect 40

How Did Overparenting Begin? 42

A Brief History of Parenting 43

The Psychology of Children 46

Spock Talk 47

Children of the 1960s 47

The Changing Paradigm of Parenting 49

Who's Minding the Store? 53

Raising a Global Child in Today's Society 54

The Big Three Parenting Styles 55

Mindful Parenting 56

Your Child's School as Co-Parent 58

Ban Those Ralls! 61

Whose Education Is This, Anyway? 63

Managing Expectations 65

Overparenting or Just Plain Dumb? 66

The Ethical Road Is Forked 69

Chapter 3 How Does Overparenting Happen? 71

Defining Success 72

In the Beginning 74

Caution: Fragile Contents Inside 75

Testing! Testing! Testing! 77

Parental Aptitude Test 78

Aptitude versus Fortitude 81

From Playdates to Preschool: Too Much Programming 81

To Schedule or to Chill? 82

But What If? 84

Do I Have to Wear a Helmet to Bed? 85

Techno Wars 86

Which Parents Are Most Susceptible to Overparenting? 88

A Warning to Divorcing Parents 94

Communication Gaps May Lead to Overparenting 95

Who Are You Really Helping? 96

Fighting the Odds 97

Chapter 4 The Agony and the Ecstasy of Your Active Child 101

Like It or Not 103

Performance Isn't Everything 105

The Curse of Electronics and the War of the Thumbs 108

Louis C. K. Explains Why He Doesn't Want His Kids to Have Smartphones 110

The Free-Play Challenge 111

Bullying: Defining Our Role as Parents 114

"I Coulda Been a Contenduh" 118

Whatever Happened to Pickup Ball? 119

Friday Night Lights to the Rescue 123

Not Everyone Can Play Quarterback 126

Chapter 5 How Overparenting Affects Your Child-and You 129

Intensive Parenting 130

The Overparenting Equation: Cause and Effect for Your Child and You 132

Overparenting = A Lack of Trust 136

Overparenting = Inadequate Life Skills 137

Overparenting = Fear of Failure 139

Overparenting = Reduced Self-Esteem 141

Overparenting = Feelings of Entitlement 143

Overparenting = Lack of Creativity 144

Overparenting = Irresponsible and Unaccountable Young Adults 147

Overparenting = Bad Role Modeling 148

Overparenting = Inept Children 149

Overparenting = Increased Anxiety 151

Overpareniing = Compromised Resilience 152

Does Overparenting Affect You, Too? 153

Which Child Is Yours? 155

Chapter 6 The Long Arms of Overparenting 161

The Technology Trap 161

East versus West 166

Considering Independent College Counselors 168

When Parents Can't Let Go 172

The Effects of Overparenting on College Graduates 174

How Overparenting Affects You as a Parent 176

Choosing a Different Path 177

Chapter 7 Looking Forward and Letting Go 181

Whose Success Are You Really Seeking? 182

Through the Looking Glass:

A Personal Note from George S. Glass, MD 184

A Prescription for Healthy Parenting 187

A Cautionary Tale from the Tabatsky Files 188

The Trickle-Down Effects of Stay-at-Home Dads 189

What Children Re-ally Want Their Parents to Do with Them 190

The Parenting Paradox 192

Acknowledgments 195

About the Authors 197

Notes 201

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