9780765703316
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Understanding the Borderline Mother: Helping Her Children Transcend the Intense, Unpredictable, and Volatile Relationship available in Paperback
- ISBN-10:
- 0765703319
- ISBN-13:
- 9780765703316
- Pub. Date:
- 07/01/2002
- Publisher:
- Aronson, Jason Inc.
Understanding the Borderline Mother: Helping Her Children Transcend the Intense, Unpredictable, and Volatile Relationship
4.4
17
5
1
59.98
In Stock
Product Details
| ISBN-13: | 9780765703316 |
|---|---|
| Publisher: | Aronson, Jason Inc. |
| Publication date: | 07/01/2002 |
| Pages: | 352 |
| Sales rank: | 168,781 |
| Product dimensions: | 5.94(w) x 10.88(h) x 1.03(d) |
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Understanding the Borderline Mother: Helping Her Children Transcend the Intense, Unpredictable, and Volatile Relationship
4.4 out of 5
based on
0 ratings.
17 reviews.
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I have just finished reading this book and want to find the author and give her a hug. She has written a very important and therapeutic text for children of Borderline mothers. Growing up and even now, people think I am exaggerating when I tell of the things my mother does or things I've lived through. Now I know there is a reason she acts this way and also that I am not alone. This is NOT a mother-bashing book. It seeks to detail behaviors and explain why she acts the way she does. The author breaks the general category of BPD into four types. This is most helpful to the reader, because all mothers do not exhibit all characteristics that can be associated with Borderline Personality Disorder which can steer people away from that diagnosis (as it did me). After reading this book, I realize that my mother, for instance, exhibits all of the 'Queen' behaviors, some of the 'Witch', with none of the 'Waif'. I hope this book reaches other children of Borderline mothers. Perhaps the best part of the book is the last quarter which offers advice on how to set boundaries with the different types of Borderline mothers.
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This book helped me understand what was happening inside the head of a family member with BPD. I have four books on the topic and I think this is the best book to begin your research. The author takes a comprehensive look at the symptoms and consequences of having BPD, breaking up the personality disorder into several "types" of borderline mothers. Although I found that such categorization is useful, the strength of the book rests in its ability to teach those of us without BPD how the mind of a BPD functions, often using concrete examples. I had long ago concluded that my mother was out of touch with reality; I finally understood why and how after reading this book. It isn't as strong a source for those suffering from BPD - there are books out there directed for BPDs that I'd look at first. But if you are a child of a BPD, start with this one!
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This is a fantastic, eye-opening book for anyone to read who has grown up with or knows of a someone with this disorder. There isn't just one type of borderline personality described here either, there are several. Reading this book really opened my eyes and helped me gain a greater understanding of my own mother and why she is the way she is. I even learned a lot about myself too. You should read this book if you grew up always feeling worthless and wrong about everything, if you grew up with a mother who went crazy every now and then over absoultey nothing, if you grew up being afraid, or always having to pretend to be someone other than your true self, this book is for you. Read it! It will change your life for the better. It sure changed mine!
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Just reading the preface of this book shook me to my core. I am blessed and greatful to have read this book, i finally feel free and able to breathe, rid of guilt associated with being a child of a borderline mother ! Its Hard To Find your way out with no one guiding you and this book did just that !
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This fantastic book shed clarity on my entire life. It gave me an entirely new, freed state of mind, and it gave me hope for a better future. Understanding this book was simple 'easy reading!'. It showed me that I wasn't alone, and that I can cope with my bad relationship with my mother without blaming myself, and without accepting her rage. This book showed me that I can move forward with my life, with the deep feeling 'down to my toes!' that I deserve to be happy.
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This book opened my eyes to a world of hurt that I have dealt with all my life and now, for the first time, begin to understand. Relieved of immense guilt, my life is now better than ever. The book is easy to understand and comprehensive enough without going into esoteric dimensions.
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As a mental health professional, I found this book to be amazing in understanding and explaining people's irrational behavior and possible thought process. It explains personality disorders, in general, and how to work with people who may have them using thoughtful communication skills. Is a great read for anyone who lives with difficult people in their lives, not just mothers. I have recommened this book to many to understand people's personalities, even those without 'borderline mothers.' The only drawback from this book is that it is not written by a mental health professional but Ms. Lawson obviously received careful guidance when writing this book. The only thing I would change is the title, as it does not pertain only to borderline mothers.
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This book is a godsend! I have been looking for answers/explanations for my mother's behavior my entire life -- this book gave me those answers. I didn't realize she wasn't unique -- I am not the only child who suffered because of a borderline mother. Easy to understand and on point!
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MY DH came home to find me on the couch with two highlighters in my hand, one pink, one yellow and this book. He asked me what I was doing."Everything in yellow is my Mother, everything in pink is me. I'm terrified."This book explained alot to me, and allowed me to accept my mother for who she is and what she can never be.
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"Understanding the Borderline Mother" is a highly informative book for the outsider, and is helpful in understanding not only the borderline parent, but in understanding and helping her children as well. This book was very well organized, and very well researched.My personal experience with the book, however, was a sense I was the fly on the wall at my family reunion. I often found myself saying, "Oh, there's Grandma..." and "That explains my mother a lot." But the biggest surprise for me was the realization that my dad, not so much my mom, was a borderline... a big A-HA! for me. This should tell you that the book is a very accurate portrayal.I would reccommend this book for anyone who works with, psychologists, social workers, etc, or is an adult child of a borderline parent. For me, this book is a bit late, as my father passed away in 2004, but I found much of what the author reccommends the adult child do, I did long before he passed. But I did learn a lot about myself as well, including why I picked my name, "The Kool-Aid Mom", and why that has been a wonderfully helpful name for me, too!
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Absolutely fantastic and from personal experience (with someone else's mother, not mine) this is completely on target. For anyone that has a borderline parent, this is a must-read.
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"Understanding the Borderline Mother" by Christine Ann Lawson is an interesting book, but I felt that it focused far too much on the negative aspects (yes there are many) of the Borderline Personality. If you pick up this book, but didn't know anything about Borderline Personality Disorder you would probably think that people with the disorder are pure awful with no redeeming qualities. The book does have some good aspects and is compelling to read, but it seems too one-sided and lacks any understanding of any of the pain and suffering that might motivate the behavior of a person with this disorder. Borderlines are often difficult patients and difficult people to understand, but many times it seems they are completely misunderstood in therapeutic situations. This book does not really attempt to "understand" the Borderline, but does describe some of the behaviors that are often times seen.
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Finding this book was a Godsend. Unfortunately we are in the mist of the "Queen Witch," but through this book I'm able to finally feel validated. I have experienced almost every phrase, behavior, and situation described in this book. I feel more confident in my decision to remain no-contact, even through the guilt trips and calls from family. This book helped me understand everything Ive been going through my entire 34 years on this earth. It was like a boulder had been lifted from shoulders and I can hold my head high. Thank You.
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