Voices of Cancer: What We Really Want, What We Really Need

Voices of Cancer: What We Really Want, What We Really Need

by Lynda Wolters


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"I don't know what to say" and "I don't know what to do" are common responses to a life-threatening diagnosis. Voices of Cancer is here to help.

Every cancer story is different, but there is one commonality: both patients and the people supporting them often struggle to properly articulate their wants and needs through particularly challenging—and in many cases, uncharted—territory. Lynda
Wolters knows firsthand: she was diagnosed with stage 4 terminal mantle cell lymphoma in August of 2016.
Voices of Cancer offers a candid look into the world of a cancer patient, informed by Lynda’s own story and conversations had with dozens of patients weighing in on their needs, wants, and dislikes as they navigate the complex world of diagnosis, treatment, and beyond. With comprehensive and accessible insight from people who’ve been there, Voices of Cancer helps educate, dispel fears, and start positive conversations about what a cancer diagnosis truly means, while shining a light on how best to support a loved one on their own terms.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781645430391
Publisher: Mascot Books
Publication date: 10/01/2019
Pages: 160
Sales rank: 1,180,832
Product dimensions: 5.50(w) x 8.25(h) x (d)

About the Author

Lynda Wolters was born and raised in a tiny farming community of 400 in northern Idaho. She worked on the family farm, her first job being picking rocks out of the fields. When she was old enough, she moved up in the farming world to driving trucks and the combine during harvest. After high school,
she traveled to New York for a few months to be a nanny before moving to Las Vegas, where she went on with her schooling. She moved back home to Idaho to raise her three sons and continues to reside there with her husband and her long-haired miniature dachshund, Tucker “Bug.”
Lynda works in a law firm in Boise and enjoys ballroom and swing dancing, horseback riding, and kayaking and rafting the rivers of Idaho. She has a heart for people and enjoys volunteering. She spends the bulk of her free time at the family’s cabin where she writes with Bug on her lap. Lynda was diagnosed with stage 4 terminal mantle cell lymphoma in August 2016 and is currently continuing treatment.

Table of Contents

Preface: The "Cancer Shift" 1

Part 1 Initial Reactions-what is in the hearts and minds of many cancer patients and what those around them need to understand.

The Patient

It's Time to Pull Up the Big-Girl Panties 13

I'm Not Mad at God 19

Prayers Are Not for Everyone 21

Voices on Prayer 22

The Non-Patient

Relationships Change When Cancer Appears 25

Voices on Counseling 27

Intimacy and Cancer 34

Voices on Broken Relationships 36

Clichés, Buzz Words, and Being Positive 39

Voices on Thoughtless Words 40

Part 2 Surviving Treatment- the pain, emotional wreckage, debilitation, and the struggle to keep a grip on and maintain mental health.

The Patient

We Are All Here to Teach and to Learn 47

Voices on Earthly Angels 48

It's My Cancer and I'll Cry If I Want To 50

Voices on Emotional and Mental Health 51

Find Others with the Same Diagnosis 54

What We Worry About 56

The Non-Patient

When a Physician is Touched by Cancer 59

Voice of a Caregiver with Cancer 62

Dark Thoughts Unspoken 65

When It's Time to Say Goodbye 71

Happy Thoughts Unspoken 72

Voices on Good Thoughts 74

Part 3 Forward into the New Normal-once you have faced what could kill you, there's no going back.

The Patient

What Does My New Normal Look Like? 79

"Normal"-What We Were Before Cancer 80

Looks Can Be Deceiving 82

Survivor's Guilt 86

Life Is Not About the Things We Have; It's About the Memories We Make 88

How to Live in the Moment 89

Maintaining Momentum 91

Clarity and Perspective 93

The Non-Patient

There Is No "Back to Normal" 97

Cure Is a Four-Letter Word 100

Laughing in the Face of Cancer 101

Never Put off Anything on Your Bucket List 104

Reflections on Life Goals 108

Part 4 Life Is Short … for Everyone-choosing to live the rest of your life with however much time you have left.

I'm the Lucky One: I Have Time to Get My S*** Together! 113

My "Live" Funeral 115

Not Afraid to Die 118

I Was Afraid, Initially 119

Acknowledgments 121


I Cancer Terminology 123

II Tips and Reminders for the Patient 133

III Tips and Reminders for the Non-Patient 137

IV Resources and Further Information 141

V Cancer Support Colors 149

References 151

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