We Can't Be Friends: A True Story

by Cyndy Etler

Overview

The companion to The Dead Inside, "[An] unnerving and heartrending memoir" (Publishers Weekly)

This is the story of my return to high school. This is the true story of how I didn't die.

High school sucks for a lot of people. High school extra sucks when you believe, deep in your soul, that every kid in the school is out to get you. I wasn't popular before I got locked up in Straight Inc., the notorious "tough love" program for troubled teens. So it's not like I was walking around thinking everyone liked me.

But when you're psychologically beaten for sixteen months, you start to absorb the lessons. The lessons in Straight were: You are evil. Your peers are evil. Everything is evil except Straight, Inc.

Before long, you're a true believer.

And when you're finally released, sent back into the world, you crave safety. Crave being back in the warehouse. And if you can't be there, you'd rather be dead.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781492660903
Publisher:	Sourcebooks
Publication date:	10/03/2017
Pages:	304
Sales rank:	764,562
Product dimensions:	5.40(w) x 8.10(h) x 1.00(d)
Age Range:	14 - 17 Years

About the Author

A modern-day Cinderella, Cyndy Etler was homeless at fourteen, summa cum laude at thirty. In her current work as a teacher and teen life coach, Etler happily teaches teens that books are better than drugs. She lives with her husband and dogs in North Carolina. Find her at CyndyEtler.com.

Editorial Reviews

"Etler's gutsy present-tense narration of her feelings of insecurity and isolation is interwoven with the sublime moments of joy she experiences in music, in writing, and in her relationships; her prose dazzles with infectious verve. A powerful story of a survivor whose irrepressible personality shines throughout even her darkest moments.
" - Kirkus

"This is a gritty, hard-hitting, and, for many readers, unfortunately necessary exploration of what's really behind the lures of self-destructive behaviors, and what real recovery is and isn't.
" - Bulletin of the Center for Children's Books

From the Publisher

10/01/2017
Gr 9 Up—This true story chronicles the author's life experiences, which landed her in Straight¸ Inc., a notorious "tough love" program for drug-addicted teens. Etler reveals, piece by piece, her childhood experiences of being sexually abused as a child and feeling genuinely unloved by her mom. Readers will be shocked and angered to find out that Etler didn't truly have an addiction problem. Her mom sent her to Straight, Inc. in order to sweep the truth of Etler's abuse under the rug. Straight, Inc. is portrayed throughout the book as a brainwashing machine. Readers who haven't read Etler's previous book will be a bit confused as to why Straight, Inc. is not described in greater detail. Etler's teen years, her complicated relationships with boys, school failures, and her unfulfilling relationship with her mom, are all written in such a way that readers will feel true compassion for her. The footnote at the end of the book encourages abuse survivors or children currently being abused to seek help without adopting a didactic tone. VERDICT For readers who enjoy real-life heartrending stories.—Jill Baetiong, formerly at Morris Area Public Library, IL

School Library Journal

2017-08-27
Etler's follow-up to her memoir, The Dead Inside (2017), charts her rocky high school years, fresh out of tough-love rehab.When Cyndy Etler was 14, her mother sent her to Straight, Inc., an abusive rehab facility where she was brainwashed into believing that she was an addict, although she had only tried pot several times. After spending 16 months locked up, Cyndy is returned to her former life to find herself the "only clean and sober student" at Masuk High School. She feels intensely isolated from her peers, doing her best to maintain a low profile while tending to her sobriety. She takes comfort from attending various AA meetings and grasps desperately at whatever shreds of love and acceptance she can snatch, including a friendship with a sober friend that turns toxic and a string of fleeting, fraught encounters with boys that leave her feeling as unwanted as ever. Loneliness gives way to depression, which she eventually learns to combat with the help of a psychiatrist and an English teacher who encourages her to write. Etler's gutsy present-tense narration of her feelings of insecurity and isolation is interwoven with the sublime moments of joy she experiences in music, in writing, and in her relationships; her prose dazzles with infectious verve. A powerful story of a survivor whose irrepressible personality shines throughout even her darkest moments. (author's note) (Memoir. 15-adult)

Kirkus Reviews