Paperback(BOOK & CD)
-
PICK UP IN STORECheck Availability at Nearby Stores
Available within 2 business hours
Related collections and offers
Product Details
| ISBN-13: | 9780976147206 |
|---|---|
| Publisher: | Clear Brook Publishing |
| Publication date: | 03/28/2005 |
| Edition description: | BOOK & CD |
| Pages: | 101 |
| Product dimensions: | 5.00(w) x 6.00(h) x 0.25(d) |
Read an Excerpt
Who's Fred, Ha!
Silly, but FUN Stress ReliefBy David Mocknick
Clear Brook Publishing
Copyright © 2005 R.R. Bowker LLCAll right reserved.
ISBN: 0-9761472-0-3
Chapter One
STEPS 1-7GETTING STARTED / FREDDING SOLO
STEP 1: GETTING STARTED
On paper, write the name FRED. Study the spelling, think of how the letters form the sound. Slowly spell and say the name aloud a dozen or more times, never breaking your concentration.
Now close your eyes and keep repeating "Fred" while visualizing popular Freds that you're familiar with. The comical effect will embrace you. Do this as long as necessary until you feel the name endearing itself to you.
Now, list all the Freds you can think of, including relatives, celebrities, cartoon and fictional characters and even animals. Say the last name, first name, then the magical phrase that makes it all happen. For example, we'll start with a couple fictional ones.
BITZ. FRED. Who's Fred?
Something's missing. We need a quick and short ending to give the phrase impact. A simple "Ha!" will do.
BITZ. FRED. Who's Fred, ha!
The secret to dispelling tension and ending in laughter lies in Fredding quickly and in rapid concession. Do it loudly, even yelling, but with feeling.
BITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
BLITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
DITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
KITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
PITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
FITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
SHITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
Feel silly? That's normal. It's also why we start solo. Getting used to the system is half the battle, mastering it the other half. Now repeat the above list until you feel the stress leaving your body.
STEP 2: RHYMING FREDS
Though the list above rhymed, they were fictional last names. Real rhymes are words that exist. How many real words rhyme with Fred? A few will come to mind, but it helps to go down the alphabet. When such words are found, follow the same procedure as with names. For example:
BED! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
BLED! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
BREAD! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
Remember: Speed and rapid concession! And with Feeling!
DEAD! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
DREAD! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
ED! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
FED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
FLED! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
HEAD! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
JED! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
LED! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
The list goes on. You can even invent words that rhyme with Fred. A list is provided, but there's no limit!
STEP 3: MUSICAL FREDS
Ever hear a song so many times that you're ready to sledgehammer the radio? One solution is ear plugs. The other ... FRED! Sing the song, substituting convenient words with Fred. Old song, but good example:
Oh, give me a home, where the FREDDIES all roam ... WHO'S FREDDIES, HA! Where the FREDS and the FREDERICKS play ... WHO'S FREDS and FREDERICKS, HA! Where seldom is heard a discouraging FRED ... WHO'S FRED, HA! And the FREDS ... WHO'S FREDS, HA! Are not FREDDING all day. WHO'S FREDDING, HA! Home, home with the FRED ... WHO'S FRED, HA!
This can be done with any song, but when doing this, make sure there are no men in white coats within hearing distance!
STEP 4: IMPERSONATIONS
At one time or another, we've all impersonated a friend, family member or celebrity ... just for fun. This can be applied to Fredding, which adds variation and freshness.
Take on the movements and voice of the character you're impersonating, thinking of how he or she would Fred. For example:
A Stutterer: D-D-DEAD! F-F-FRED! WHO'S F-F-FRED, HA!
A Lisper: Where ith my THLED? Ith with that FRED! WHO'TH THAT FRED, HA!
A Gossiper: Did you hear about NED? Got caught with FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
A Whisperer: Psst! Hey, FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
A Screamer: I'm gonna see RED!! About that FRED! WHO'S THAT FRED, HA!
A Nervous Person: I, uh, you know, uh, ride a MOPED. You know, uh, with that FRED. WHO'S THAT FRED, HA!
Celebrities are always fun. Certain distinctive ones are especially fun. For example, Elvis, Mae West and Cagney. Be careful impersonating your spouse, or you may wind up impersonating a hotel guest!
STEP 5: DOUBLE FREDS
Adjoining words or expressions that coincidentally rhyme with Fred are rare. One such example is Dead Head. On these occasions, a double Fred is needed. For example:
DEAD HEAD FRED, FRED! TWO FREDS? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA!
Notice how the format changed. This happens when a new concept is added to the system. Growth and development is the creativity that keeps the system interesting and fun. Most double Freds are intentional. Rhyming or non-rhyming will achieve the same effect. An example of rhyming:
DEAD, BED! FRED, FRED! TWO FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA!
SLED, BREAD! FRED, FRED! TWO FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA!
SAID, FLED! FRED, FRED! TWO FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA!
An example of non-rhyming:
DITZ, BOOZIE! FRED, FRED! TWO FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA!
SHITZ, FLOOZIE! FRED, FRED! TWO FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA!
CORNEY, HASBA! FRED, FRED! TWO FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA!
Bear in mind that the names used are all fictitious, but you get the idea. You needn't stop at doubles, as you'll see in step 6.
STEP 6: MULTIPLE FREDS
This follows the pattern of Double Freds, but goes from three to ... wherever. Three word phrases or expressions coincidentally rhyming with Fred are unlikely, so Multiple Freds are always intentional. Again, we have rhyming and non-rhyming.
Rhyming:
RED, DEAD, BED! FRED, FRED, FRED! THREE FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED! HA! HA! HA!
SLED, TED, HEAD, BED! FRED, FRED, FRED, FRED! FOUR FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA! HA! HA!
Remember, in rapid concession. I can't emphasize this enough!
DEAD, BED, SAID, TED, LED! FRED, FRED, FRED, FRED, FRED! FIVE FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!
Non Rhyming:
DITZ, BOOZIE, HECKLE! FRED, FRED, FRED! THREE FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA! HA!
GLOWZ, BOOZIE, SHITZ, HOOPLE! FRED, FRED, FRED, FRED! FOUR FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WH0'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA! HA! HA!
HOOPLE, SHITZ, BOOZIE, GLOWZ, HINEY! FRED, FRED, FRED, FRED, FRED! FIVE FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA! HA! HA! HA!
Multiples can go from three to three million (if you can do it without hyper-ventilating)!
STEP 7: GRABBING WORDS / BAITING
How often does an average conversation contain words rhyming with Fred? Never noticed? You'll start and Fredding will flow. Just listen to a conversation and pick up on the Fred rhymes. Grab them and let the Fredding begin. You will spark curiosity, so you can introduce the system to the ones conversing. Let's say that You, Bill and Jim are in the diner. Bill and Jim are engaged in conversation.
Bill: You look DEAD. You: FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA! Jim: Yeah, I was late getting to BED. You: FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA! Bill: Havin' a bad day, Jim? Jim: Sure am. Cut myself shaving and BLED. You: FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
By now, Bill and Jim are beyond curious, or they'll think you flipped. Either way, they'll ask. Since the system is so catchy, chances are that Bill and Jim will join in and want to learn the system. Now, you have fellow fredders.
Baiting is when you intentionally bait someone into using words that rhyme with Fred. For example, same diner, same people. The waitress approaches your table.
Waitress: Can I take your order? Jim: Manhattan clam chowder ... that's white? Waitress: RED. Jim: FRED! Jim, Bill, You: WHO'S FRED, HA!! Bill: Can I have some butter and...... Waitress: BREAD? Bill: FRED! Bill, Jim, You: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Waitress: Are you guys READY? (that's a lucky one)! Bill, Jim, You: FREDDY! Bill, Jim, You: WHO'S FREDDY, HA! You: I think I'd like a pasta dish. What do you have? Waitress: Stuffed shells? You: No, something more basic. Waitress: How about SPAGHETTI? You, Bill, Jim: FOR FREDDIE! You, Bill, Jim: WHO'S SPAGHETTI FOR FREDDIE, HA!
You'll find that Fredding is always more fun with others, especially when grabbing words and baiting. If you try the diner, make sure your waitress is good natured, or you could wind up wearing your salad!
STEPS 8-11
DUO AND GROUP FREDDING
STEP 8: DUO FREDDING
90% of my friends are Fredaholics. Fredding rubbed off, caught on and became a part of their lives. When Fredding with others, it's good to take turns with key words so that everyone involved gets equal system use. Thus everyone enjoys the effects. You'll notice a format change, especially during double and multiple Fredding. Notice the changes between solo and duo.
* SOLO FREDDING * - SINGLE, DOUBLE AND MULTIPLE
SINGLE FRED:
BED! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
DOUBLE FREDS:
DEAD HEAD! FRED, FRED! TWO FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA!
MULTIPLE FREDS:
DEAD, BED, SAID! FRED, FRED, FRED! THREE FREDS!? WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA! HA!
* DUO FREDDING * - SINGLE, DOUBLE AND MULTIPLE
SINGLE FRED:
Person 1: BED! Person 2: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
DOUBLE FREDS:
Person 1: DEAD HEAD! Person 2: FRED, FRED! Person 1: TWO FREDS!? Person 2: TWO FREDS!! Both: WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA!
MULTIPLE FREDS:
Person 1: DEAD, BED, SAID! Person 2: FRED, FRED, FRED! Person 1: THREE FREDS!? Person 2: THREE FREDS!! Both: WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA! HA!
When group Fredding, follow the same example. Each person can take turns as to who says what key words, but equal participation is essential for everyone to enjoy the stress relieving magic of Fred. WHO'S FRED, HA!? (Sorry, couldn't resist)!
STEP 9: CHANGING MOODS
It's amazing how Fredding can change an entire mood or atmosphere. For example, a friend and I were sitting in a diner. We were tired, disgusted and sitting in silence. But then ...
Me: DEAD! Friend: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Me: BED! Friend: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Me: SLED! Friend: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Friend: DEAD HEAD! Me: FRED, FRED! Friend: TWO FREDS!? Me: TWO FREDS!! Both: WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA!
Me: BLED, RED! Friend: FRED, FRED! Me: TWO FREDS!? Friend: TWO FREDS!! Both: WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA!
Friend: SHITZ! Me: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Me: BOOZIE, SHITZ, HOSEY! Friend: FRED, FRED, FRED!
Me: THREE FREDS!? Friend: THREE FREDS!! Both: WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, WHO'S FRED, HA! HA! HA!
A contest formed! Who could think of more names and Fred rhymes? In five minutes we went from Grim Reapers to laughing clowns! Thus illustrates the power of the "Who's Fred Ha!?" system for stress relief!
STEP 10: FICTIONAL CONVERSATIONS
Another form of Fredding that is fresh and new is creating fictional conversations. Of course, creativity will keep the conversation fun and original. Picture the same diner (have you guessed ... I love diners)? There's a lull in the conversation, so ...
Me: This morning, getting out of BED ... Friend: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Me: Had a pain in my HEAD! Friend: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Friend: You shaved and you BLED ... Me: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Me: Was hungry, but was out of BREAD! Friend: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Friend: Then how were you FED? Me: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Me: Had donuts INSTEAD! Friend: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Friend: You should've called NED! Me: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Me: He was out on his SLED! Friend: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Friend: Well, what about ED!? Me: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Me: He was out being WED! Friend: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Friend: WED?? Me: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
Friend: I though that he FLED! Me: FRED! Both: WHO'S FRED, HA!
When doing this in a restaurant, don't let the staring bother you. Maybe the owner's name is..... Fred!!!
STEP 11: GROUP FREDDING
This aspect of the system serves several purposes. Not only can it entertain and relieve stress for the whole group, but can also serve as a sanity saver.
Ever take a field trip with fifth graders? After an hour on the bus, anyone mentioning a bottle of beer on the wall risks death! The solution? You guessed it! FRED!
Give each student a slip of paper bearing a Fred rhyme or last name. One at a time, have them yell out what's on their paper and the others will respond.
Kid #1 DITZ! All: FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
Kid #2: SHITZ! All: FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
Kid #3: BED! All: FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
You can also explain double and multiple Freds and run with it. Another option is MUSICAL FREDS (a popular song with FRED substituted for convenient words).
The time passes, the kids are happy and your sanity is spared. You're not limited to restless riders. Any gathering can become a Fredding session. The result will be a laughing, stress free group (or a concerned mob that forces you into a straight jacket)!
FRED ACTIVITIES
These seemingly silly activities prevent boredom, adding effectiveness to the system.
NAMES
This list of fictitious Freds will serve until you develop a list of real ones. Celebrities, relatives and famous animals are a good start. If you get stuck, there's always the phone book.
BLITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
DITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
SHITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
PUTZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
FITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
HOOTER! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
COOTIE FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
GLITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
MITZLES! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
WITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
ZITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
SPITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
FRIZZLE! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
FRIZZY! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
DIZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
SLITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
TWIT! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
QUITZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
BOWZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
GLOWZ! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
FLOOZIE! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
FLOXIE FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
HOOZIE! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
BOOZER! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
DOOZIE! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
FLAMMER! FRED! WHO'S FRED, HA!
Once you have real names, you'll more relate to the list.
RHYMES
Rhymes are more fun than names. You can go down the alphabet. If you need more, invent them. You won't get flack from Webster! You'll notice a few little variations on these. For example: DEAD ... FRED....
Continues...
Excerpted from Who's Fred, Ha! by David Mocknick Copyright © 2005 by R.R. Bowker LLC. Excerpted by permission.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.