Wicked Italian for the Traveler

Wicked Italian for the Traveler



Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780894806179
Publisher: Workman Publishing Company, Inc.
Publication date: 01/28/1989
Pages: 64
Product dimensions: 4.02(w) x 6.08(h) x 0.19(d)

About the Author

Howard Tomb is the author of the Wicked Travel books. He also writes for the Sunday Travel Section of the New York Times.

Read an Excerpt

Men: Unleash the Latin Lover Inside You

To compete with the Natives, non-European men must know two things: Italian men are willing to exaggerate beyond all the bounds of reason, and women are willing to believe them. Sometimes.

I have never known love until now.
Non ho mai conosciuto Yamore fino ad oggi.

The profound mystery of whatever you just said sets my heart on fire.
Il profundo mistero di ciò che stai dicendo mi infuoca il cuore.

I will kill myself if you ever leave me.
Se mi lasci mi uccido.

What is your name, my celestial fruit basket?
Come ti chiami, mio cestino di frutta celestiale?

Your name is like an ageless aria to my ears.
Il tuo nome suona alle mie orecchie come una melodia senza eta.

What? This man is your husband?
Che cosa? Quello è tuo marito!?

You deserve greater joy than such a man could ever provide!
Meriti ben altra gioia che quella che può dare un tipo così!

You deny our everlasting love!?
Neghi l-Yamore eterno!?

Then at least give me your phone number, my heavenly marinara sauce.
Almeno dammi il tuo numero ditelefono, mio sugo alla marinara.

Table of Contents



  • Welcome to Italy…5
  • Hand-to-Hand Conversation…6
  • Linguistic Disclaimer…7

  • Classic Border Pleas…8
  • Ending Taxi Terror…10
  • Understanding Your Fare…11
  • Doing the Locomotion…12
  • Note to Men…13
  • Train Travel Tips…14
  • Throwing the Switch…15
  • You Can Win at Hotel Negotiation…16
  • Fending Off Gypsy Curses…18
  • A Rose Is a Ruse…19
  • The Italian Phone System…20
  • Prayer to Saint Ilaria, Virgin of Naples…21
  • Italian Drugs You May Need…22
  • How and When to Quote Dante…23
  • Elementary Cursing…24

  • The Automobile: An Italian Love Affair…26
  • Prayer to Saint Laura of Rome…27
  • Lying to Policemen: The National Pastime…28
  • Assorted International Symbols…30
  • Shouting in Traffic…31

  • Beautiful Names of Revolting Dishes and Vice Versa…32
  • Declining the Imperative…34
  • Secrets of the Italian Coffee Shop…35
  • Meaningful Things to Say About Olive Oil…36
  • Your Inevitable Stains…37
  • Your Medical Emergency…38

    • The Shoe and the Wallet…40
    • Prayer to Saint Ferragamo…41
    • Armani Versus Our Money…42
    • Understanding Italian Business Hours…44
    • Solving the Riddle of Museum Hours…46
    • Your Emergency Confession…48
    • Political Discourse…54
    • Authentic Screaming for Spectators…52

    • Men: Unleash the Latin Lover Inside You…54
    • Women: Deflate the Latin Lover Behind You…56
    • Pet Names: Animal…57
    • Making Love…58
    • Pet Names: Vegetable…59
    • Denying Your Infidelity…61
    • Pet Names: Celestial…62l
    • Effective Letter-Writing…63

    Customer Reviews

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    Wicked Italian for the Traveler 2.5 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 2 reviews.
    Guest More than 1 year ago
    I suppose my expectations were higher than the comic book that arrived. Its full of amusing phrases--'Thank you, but I had blood pudding for breakfast.'--rather than useful information and slang. And many of the phrases are not even in correct Italian! A survival guide its not. Save the five bucks and look elsewhere. Or as one of the 'survival' phrases puts it, 'Want to see a really big boil?'
    Guest More than 1 year ago
    Although this book is lacking in some areas of proper Italian usage, its strengh is in the humor. I have used this book while in Italy and on a few ocassions, it came in handy, such as the taxi ride from the Roma airport to the hotel. The driver was a 'cucciolo malato.' This book is a definite must if making a trip to Italy. One of my Italian friends helped me make some corrections, adjustments, and amendments to the phrases in this book. Ciao, gli amici mio.