Week after week, they sit in church . . . alone. They are the spiritually mismatched, those who are committed to a spouse who does not share their faith. Feeling abandoned by their spouse and forgotten by their church, they live out their faith in survival mode, guarding the spiritual flame yet never feeling free to share it. But God wants them to thrive—not just survive.
Winning Him Without Words presents 10 Christ centered keys to thriving in a spiritual mismatch. Readers are encouraged to commit to Christian community, to release their spouse to God’s capable hands, to find peace in their relationships with Christ and with their spouse, to continue their pursuit of a growing faith and to love their spouse with fresh enthusiasm. God wants every marriage to exude peace and love, and Winning Him Without Words empowers readers to create that environment in their homes and thrive as God works.
Winning Him Without Words was the recipient of the Non-Fiction Book of 2011 Award from the San Diego Christian Writers Guild. The San Diego Christian Writers Guild is one of the largest countywide Christian writers group in the United States.
|Publisher:||Gospel Light Publications|
|Product dimensions:||5.50(w) x 8.40(h) x 0.90(d)|
|Age Range:||18 Years|
About the Author
LYNN DONOVAN writes for the online ministry she founded in 2006, Spiritually Unequal Marriage. Lynn is a popular Bible study leader and national speaker who dispels the myths women believe about love and marriage and points them to the freedom that is theirs through a living relationship with Christ. She lives in Temecula, California, with her husband, Mike.
DINEEN MILLER believes her years as a youth counselor, a Stephen Minister, a women’s ministry leader and a small group leader fuel her desire to ignite the souls of others through words of truth. She’s also a C.L.A.S.S. Communicator and has been featured on the Moody Radio Network, Family on the Family and FamilyLife Today. She lives in the Bay Area with her husband. They have two daughters and a son-in-law. Dineen is the coauthor of Winning Him Without Words: 10 Keys to Thriving in Your Spiritually Mismatched Marriage and author of The Soul Saver. Visit Dineen online at spirituallyunequalmarriage.com.
Table of Contents
Meet Lynn Donovan 15
Meet Dineen Miller 21
Key #1 Know that You're Not Alone! 25
Key #2 Don't Save Your Husband-Save Yourself 39
Key #3 Stay Connected 53
Key #4 Know the Essentials of Love: Hope, Joy, Peace and Trust (Oh, Yeah, and Respect) 67
Key #5 Believe Your Marriage Is Blessed 83
Key #6 Trade Perfection for Authenticity 95
Key #7 Pick and Choose Your Battles 107
Key #8 Move from Hurt to Healing-Seasons of Marriage 121
Key #9 Keep Your Armor On-You're at War! 135
Key #10 Learn When to Pray the Most Dangerous Prayer 149
Conclusion: Continuing the Journey 165
Appendix 1 What About the Kids? 167
Appendix 2 Praying Scriptures 179
Appendix 3 Family Faith Record 191
Appendix 4 Leader's Guide for Study Groups 193
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
I may not be in a spiritually mismatched marriage myself, but I know lots of women who are and this book could be a marriage saving tool for so many of them. It could also be the tool that eventually turns that spiritual mismatch into a match. This book is easy to read and full of real life examples that make it very engaging. Lynn and Dineen really bare their souls as they go through their personal experiences and what they have learned. I personally found it wonderful just as a refresher on important things in a marriage (your husband needs and deserves your respect...) for me personally as well. Though this book may seem to have a limited audience who will really be able to appreciate it, every marriage could learn a lot from this little gem.
Unequally yoked marriages are something all counselors encounter in session. We are trained to bring up the "hot button" issues like children, finances, and faith during premarital counseling because differences in key areas like these can lead to marital disharmony. In essence, therapists operate on the assumption that it's better to know ahead of time if you and your partner don't see eye-to-eye, so you can get a head start on resolving the issues instead of being blindsided by them later. But what if faith wasn't an issue when you first married? What if you came to a saving knowledge later in life and your spouse didn't? Or what if you shunned your faith values for a period, got married, and then came back to your faith? Authors Lynn Donovan and Dineen Miller wrote their book Winning Him Without Words in an attempt to answer questions just like these, because they found themselves in the scenarios mentioned above. Both authors are so candid throughout the book that I never felt like this was just another Christian self-help book. These are real women, struggling with real issues, who don't claim to have all the answers. They do, however, claim to know the One who does. Despite years or praying for their husband's salvation, both Lynn and Dineen found certain principles to help their marriage thrive instead of wither and die. As a counselor, I wanted to take note of the 10 keys that helped them, and I'm so glad I did, because now I have a book to whole-heartedly recommend to clients facing similar life circumstances. Women everywhere will be able to relate to the yearning both women disclose they have for their husbands to accept Christ, because if we haven't prayed for our husband's salvation, then we've prayed for a change in our husband's attitudes or actions. All married women feel alone in their marriage at some point, and these principles Lynn and Dineen offer are solid ways to bring about real connection. In fact, one of the keys presented was to Stay Connected. In order to do this, Lynn joined a fantasy football league with her husband, even though she knew nothing about football. Dineen started playing disc golf. Yes, it required sacrifice of time and maybe even some of their own desires, but both marriages enriched from it. This is a great takeaway for women everywhere.
I gave a copy to my church for the pastor who counsels on marriage. What we both loved was that these women are talking from the trenches. They give practical ways to love their unbelieving husbands. Good solid Biblical teaching, encourages, inspires, and give hope those in mismatched marriages.
This book is a must read for anyone struggling at all in a spiritually mismatched marriage! It will change your life! I highly recommend it for any marriage, really. The principles are universal. What is amazing about this book is that the Ten Keys will not only improve any marriage, they will bring you closer to God. When I started this book I was hoping for tips to help me SURVIVE a spiritual mismatch. What I came away with were tips for helping me thrive in my marriage and possibly have an even deeper and stronger relationship with my King than I might were I on an easier path. I can assure you from experience, spiritual mismatch is not easy. But could it be an environment out of which you emerge an even stronger warrior for Jesus than if you had an easier path? Only God knows, but I'm telling you this book will take you one step closer!!! LOVED IT!!! Thank you Lynn & Dineen! ~Brenda
I laughed and I cried as I read this book and through all of it I was amazed to realize there are other women out there that feel the same way I do. I was encouraged, inspired and convicted, and now I am motivated to stive for a marriage that is not just mediocre but thrives despite the belief differences of my husband and I. This book is wonderfully written and definitely God-inspired. Lynn and Dineen clearly understand the unique issues of being spiritually mismatched and have learned with God's help to thrive in their marriages. Now they are sharing this hope with others. As I read the book I felt that I was sitting across the table from an old friend having coffee. They give practical advice on how to put your trust in God, to have hope in what is often a hopeless situation and learn to enjoy and thrive in the present. They are examples of how you don't have to wait until your husband puts his faith in God before you can truly enjoy your marriage and share a deep and intimate bond with your spouse. I personally plan to read this book at least once a year as a reminder that God has enabled me to truly love and cherish my beloved husband whether or not he shares my faith in God.
Donovan's/Miller's book "Winning Him Without Words" is an encouraging book that will help not only unequally yoked couples, but all couples. The book is written from the heart, which you can feel in every word. God is in the center of the authors' marriages and they trust God for their husbands salvation. Donovan and Miller not only talk the talk, they walk it in obedience to God.