A TIME Top 100 Must-Read Book of 2020
An International Bestseller

“An intimate and wide-ranging look at fears and how we overcome them.”—The New York Times

“Eva Holland survived her worst fear. Since childhood, she worried about losing her mother. But after her mother died and she endured the grief that followed, she also found new strength and hope—and decided to write a book about why fear takes such a hold of just about everyone.”—A TIME Top 100 Must-Read Book of 2020

“The publication of Nerve could be one of the most germane and significant books to help people navigate through our current dark and unfamiliar emotional and physical territory. With acuity of purpose, author Holland demonstrates to her audience that armed with a baseline of knowledge, fear is an emotion that can be experienced, examined, and conquered, thereby strengthening the human psyche and its ability to deal with future catastrophes.”—New York Journal of Books

“Brave and emboldening. Nerve exposes fear for what it really is: a flush of chemicals, an evolutionary instinct, a mirror to the self.”—Kate Harris, author of Lands of Lost Borders

"Eva Holland is afraid of many things [and] counter-intuitively, makes a living doing things that would scare the bejesus out of most people. . . A few years ago, Eva decided to find out what was at the root of all these fears."—Noel King, NPR's Morning Edition

“Nerve is brave and tender, and an example of why journalists treating themselves as guinea pigs should never completely go out of style.”—WIRED

“[Holland’s] comprehensive look at fear, sometimes as a test subject and other times as a critical observer, reframes the conversation of how we approach these often-paralyzing reactions that seem ingrained in our personalities.”—Discover Magazine

“Science and psychology inform the engaging memoir of an author on a self-help mission. . . . Her goal is not to eliminate fear, but to put it into perspective.”—Kirkus Reviews

“Combining anecdotes that document her personal vulnerabilities with tales of outdoor adventure and just enough scientific research, Holland crafts an engaging and unique memoir. Fans of the self-help genre and popular science in the style of Mary Roach will enjoy this debut title.”—Library Journal

“A readable overview of what happens when human beings lose their nerve, author Holland employs relatable life experiences to explore multiple facets of fear. . . . Readers share in the journey as Holland confronts her fears and comes to successfully manage them. . . . This might encourage readers to identify, examine, and tackle fears of their own.”—Booklist

“A fascinating book . . . Much of the enjoyment of Nerve involves rooting for Holland as she attempts to wrestle her own fears to the ground, and to report on the outcome of that effort would spoil that pleasure. It’s enough to say that by the end of this account, her relationship to fear has changed, something that may well happen to the readers of her engaging book.”—Shelf Awareness

“[A] courageous chronicle of many fraught years facing down two debilitating phobias. . . Poignant and humorous, Holland’s demon-chasing journey is an inspiration.”—Foreword Reviews

“Holland delves into gene theory, evolutionary biology, and psychoanalysis looking for answers to why we fear the way we do, but ultimately, scientific knowledge can only take her so far; gradually, she comes to accept herself and her complicated relationship to fear. A little bit of fear, it turns out, is natural and healthy. Learning what is and is not an irrational phobia and how to asses real danger enables Holland to manage her feelings and take risks in spite of them.”—Sierra Club Magazine

“An enlightening intellectual road trip . . . Holland is an ideal companion—warm and intelligent, open-hearted and clear-eyed. . . . [She] has felt, and conquered—and then captured and made sense of—fears so intense that they made me wince just reading about them.”—Rob Moor, author of On Trails

“I really enjoyed Nerve—Holland perfectly balances her personal story with actual science, and I appreciated the clarity with which she describes her experiences. It gave me a lot to think about.”—Alex Honnold, rock climber and author of Alone on the Wall

“Nerve is a gorgeous journey . . . a love letter to life itself: to the instincts and relationships that sustain us, to all the ways we find to push through.”—Blair Braverman, Iditarod racer and author of Welcome to the Goddamn Ice Cube

“A white-knuckle journey into extreme states of terror and grief. It’s a gift for all of us who are fated to live with fear and sorrow—that is, for human beings.”—Brian Phillips, author of Impossible Owls

“Brave, surprising, and gorgeous. . . . by using science to understand and confront her worst fears, [Holland] shows us how to find peace with our own.”—Jason Fagone, author of The Woman Who Smashed Codes

“A moving, groundbreaking look at how we can live in a world filled with dangers, both real and perceived, by one of the most talented writers working today.”—Frank Bures, author of The Geography of Madness

“A raw, intimate account. . . scarily good and profoundly brave.”—Luke Dittrich, author of Patient HM

03/01/2020

Fear is essential for human survival, acknowledges Outdoor correspondent Holland, but when her anxieties began seriously to inhibit her life, the author decided to conduct an in-depth exploration of the science of fear in an attempt to conquer her own. Here Holland examines phobias, trauma, and existential fears. Each category is meaningful for Holland, as she has a fear of heights, fear of driving after a series of car accidents, and a life-long fear of losing her mother (which sadly came to pass). Holland walks readers through the science behind this emotion, specifically what happens in the brain during an terrifying experience. She also deciphers much of the research aimed at helping people overcome their feelings of dread. Using herself as a guinea pig, Holland explored various treatment paths, including exposure therapy and other clinical and pharmaceutical approaches. VERDICT Combining anecdotes that document her personal vulnerabilities with tales of outdoor adventure and just enough scientific research, Holland crafts an engaging and unique memoir. Fans of the self-help genre and popular science in the style of Mary Roach will enjoy this debut title.—Ragan O'Malley, Saint Ann's Sch., Brooklyn

2020-01-07
Her mother's unexpected death inspires a Yukon Territory-based adventurer and travel journalist to face her fears.

In a harmonious blend of memoir and science reporting, Outside correspondent Holland describes her attempts to "learn to master my fear," embarking on a three-year project of research and treatment following the devastating death of her mother. Her mother had been an orphan, shaken by the death of her own mother, which left the author anticipating her mother's death more fearfully than anything else. When Holland's fears were realized, she fell apart, unable to work or deal with people and falling into free-floating anxiety and the occasional panic attack. Other fears came to the fore of her consciousness—e.g., a fear of heights from a childhood escalator mishap (though she later learned that her father had suffered from something similar and that such fears might be genetic in origin) and lingering PTSD from a series of car crashes. The book is most compelling at its most personal, as the author makes her story seem both specific and universal: "An irony: fear is an experience that unites us, even as, in the moment, it makes us feel very much alone." Holland faced her challenges through both exposure therapy and pharmaceutical applications, and she traces the theories of fear and how to treat it, including Freudian therapy, lobotomy, electroshock treatment, and other more modern approaches. Throughout the narrative, the author develops herself as a protagonist whose fears are serious enough to benefit from treatment but whose condition should strike a responsive chord in many readers. Her goal is not to eliminate fear, which serves as a tool for self-preservation, but to put it into perspective. By the end, she writes, "I am much less afraid of fear itself."

Science and psychology inform the engaging memoir of an author on a self-help mission.