The Gates to Brilliance: How a Gay, Jewish, Middle-Class Kid Who Loved Horses Found Success

The Gates to Brilliance: How a Gay, Jewish, Middle-Class Kid Who Loved Horses Found Success

The Gates to Brilliance: How a Gay, Jewish, Middle-Class Kid Who Loved Horses Found Success

The Gates to Brilliance: How a Gay, Jewish, Middle-Class Kid Who Loved Horses Found Success

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Overview

An authentically honest and self-reflective promise of how a life lived with purpose and passion can yield greatness.

“The gates to brilliance are surrounded by a cloud of sweat and tears.” That is what Olympic dressage rider and coach Robert Dover’s mentor, the revered Swedish equestrian Colonel Bengt Ljungquist, told him. It is a lesson that stuck—only with great passion and determination can one achieve success, and just maybe, happiness, too.

In a fascinating book that reads like a potent elixir, three parts memoir and one part inspirational self-improvement guide, readers are ushered through 15 “gates to brilliance”—keys that Dover discovered as he made his way through his own life, from gawky, horse-crazy child to influential Olympic coach and entrepreneur. Sharing deeply personal stories that were fundamental to his evolution, Dover is candid about the path he took on his way to becoming one of the most successful equestrians in the world. Readers learn about abuse he suffered as a child, and his formative years as the only Jewish kid on Grand Bahama Island. He writes frankly about his father’s alcoholism, his parents’ divorce, and his unwavering devotion to his mother. The book delves into his fear of coming out, explores love and loss, and examines the perfectionist tendencies that have at times held Dover back, while at others, have helped him rise to all new heights.

In addition, readers hear stories from the barns, arenas, and show grounds where Dover built his career, from his days as a wild Pony Clubber to his struggles in Germany under the tutelage of some of Europe’s great riding masters. We meet the horses and people he partnered with along the way as he offers a glimpse behind the curtain at the pomp and politics of international equestrian competition.

Throughout, Dover’s dedication to self-betterment and belief in living a life with purpose stands front and center, softened by his humor and willingness to cast a critical eye on himself. With countless moments of searing honesty bound to fundamental life lessons from which he hopes we can all learn, Dover assures us the road to success is there for the taking. The ultimate goal, though, is to emerge on the other side of whatever comes next a brighter, more compassionate, happier person—that is brilliance.


Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781570769870
Publisher: Trafalgar Square
Publication date: 11/09/2021
Pages: 296
Sales rank: 1,103,922
Product dimensions: 6.00(w) x 9.00(h) x 1.10(d)

About the Author

Robert Dover served as Technical Advisor and Chef d’Equipe for The Dutta Corp. U.S. Dressage Team from 2013 to 2018. Under his leadership, the U.S. Dressage Team returned to the podium at the 2016 Olympic Games in Rio de Janeiro, where the team won a bronze medal. Additionally, in 2015 Dover coached the U.S. Dressage Team to a gold medal at the Pan American Games, and in 2018, a team and individual silver medal at the World Equestrian Games in Tryon, North Carolina.

A six-time Olympian and four-time Olympic bronze medalist, and the first openly gay Olympic athlete when he came out in 1988, Dover has earned more honors than any other U.S. dressage rider, competing in six Olympic Games (1984, 1988, 1992, 1996, 2000, and 2004) with four medals (1992, 1996, 2000, and 2004) and seven FEI World Equestrian Games, winning team bronze and placing fifth individually at the 1994 WEG in The Hague. Dover was seven-time U.S. Grand Prix National Champion and rode in seven World Cups. He also became the first American since 1960 to win the Aachen Grand Prix in 1987—something Dover considers a distinguished moment in his career.

In the mid-nineties, Dover was a founding member of the Equestrian AIDS Foundation, which provided financial assistance and emotional support to those in the horse industry stricken with AIDS. The mission expanded in 2006 to help all fellow equestrians in need overcome adversity, focus on healing, and rebuild their lives.

Dover has been a major influencer in American dressage for decades, including being the driving force behind the creation of The Global Dressage Festival venue and series, a huge and positive game-changer for the sport. He also spearheaded American Equestrians Got Talent, the largest equestrian fundraising talent show, which brought in well over $1,000,000 for U.S. Equestrian Federation High Performance competitive and training programs during his tenure as Chef d’Equipe/Coach of the U.S. Team.

Dover is known as both an entrepreneur and philanthropist with never-ending energy and passion once he sets his sights on his goals. He lives in Wellington, Florida.

Table of Contents

Foreword ix

Preface xiii

Chapter 1 Childhood Games

Living with Purpose by Defining Your Passion 1

Chapter 2 Getting Lost to Find My Way

Producing a Roadmap to Your Goal 13

Chapter 3 The Yellow Brick Road

Following the Right System 23

Chapter 4 A Rather Silly Sport

Focus, Patience, Humor, and Humility 33

Chapter 5 Scars on My Heart

Loss, Mourning, Grief, and Grace 57

Chapter 6 Beauty, Death, and OCD

Facing Down Fear 97

Chapter 7 Going Off Course

Embracing the Art of Failure 111

Chapter 8 Brilliance Lives on the Edge

Establishing and Expanding Confidence 131

Chapter 9 Jump into the Great Lake

Surrounding Yourself with Good People 147

Chapter 10 Touch Your Toes

Maintaining Physical Health and Well-Being 163

Chapter 11 Say What You Need

Communication and Getting Professional Help 181

Chapter 12 Think of It as Rain

Finding Love and Giving it Back 191

Chapter 13 One Good Thing

Being of Service and Paying It Forward 225

Chapter 14 Be a Star not a Victim

Making Every Single Day a Joyful, Fabulous Adventure 239

Chapter 15 Memories and Drinking Stories

Being Conscious of and Thankful for Every Revelation 245

Doverisms 255

Acknowledgments 265

Index 267

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