Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society, and the Meaning of Sex

by Angela Chen Narrated by Natalie Naudus

Overview

An engaging exploration of what it means to be asexual in a world that's obsessed with sexual attraction, and what the ace perspective can teach all of us about desire and identity.

What exactly is sexual attraction and what is it like to go through life not experiencing it? What does asexuality reveal about gender roles, about romance and consent, and the pressures of society? This accessible examination of asexuality shows that the issues that aces face-confusion around sexual activity, the intersection of sexuality and identity, navigating different needs in relationships-are the same conflicts that nearly all of us will experience. Through a blend of reporting, cultural criticism, and memoir, Ace addresses the misconceptions around the “A” of LGBTQIA and invites everyone to rethink pleasure and intimacy.

Journalist Angela Chen creates her path to understanding her own asexuality with the perspectives of a diverse group of asexual people. Vulnerable and honest, these stories include a woman who had blood tests done because she was convinced that “not wanting sex” was a sign of serious illness, and a man who grew up in a religious household and did everything “right,” only to realize after marriage that his experience of sexuality had never been the same as that of others. Disabled aces, aces of color, gender-nonconforming aces, and aces who both do and don't want romantic relationships all share their experiences navigating a society in which a lack of sexual attraction is considered abnormal. Chen's careful cultural analysis explores how societal norms limit understanding of sex and relationships and celebrates the breadth of sexuality and queerness.

Editorial Reviews

NOVEMBER 2020 - AudioFile

Natalie Naudus’s lively narration paired with Chen’s engaging prose makes for a winning combination in this accessible and nuanced introduction to asexuality. Through the lens of her own experiences and those of other aces, Chen explores the multiplicity of ace identities, the history of the asexual movement, and the many lessons asexuality has to teach about sex, desire, consent, and the diversity of human relationships. Naudus strikes the perfect balance between intimacy and detachment. She handles the research and analysis in a clear, level voice. In the personal sections, she lets Chen’s anger, alienation, pride, and excitement shine through. Whether you’re a proud ace or have never heard of asexuality, this audiobook will shake up your understanding of human sexuality in the most invigorating way. L.S. © AudioFile 2020, Portland, Maine

Publishers Weekly

06/15/2020

Journalist Chen probes the nuances of asexuality in her well-intentioned yet muddled debut. According to Chen, asexuality exists on a spectrum from “sex-repulsed” to “sex-indifferent” to “sex-favorable,” but what links “aces” is their lack of the experience of sexual attraction, which she defines as “the desire to have sex with a specific person for physical reasons.” In Chen’s own case, she began to identify as an ace in her mid-20s, after realizing that she only ever wanted partnered sex for emotional—not physical—reasons. She notes that Alfred Kinsey deliberately left asexuality off his scale of sexual orientation in the 1940s, and sketches the origins of the ace movement in early 21st-century internet message boards. Drawing on interviews with more than 100 aces, Chen profiles an African-American filmmaker, a disability activist, and a Christian man who, before accepting his asexuality, hadn’t considered “that lust might not be a struggle at all.” Though Chen succeeds in exploring the full range of asexuality, her stated desire to transcend labels is undermined by a hyper-focus on categorical minutiae, and her analogies (such as a comparison between sex and eating crackers) often miss the mark. Aces will appreciate seeing themselves reflected in Chen’s sensitive portrayals; non-aces are likely to remain confused by the concept. (Sept.)

From the Publisher

[Ace] is a [thoughtful] combination of reportage, cultural criticism and memoir, and the writing attempts the difficult balance between proof and emotion. [Most striking is] Chen’s honesty, the sentences of intimate reflection that appear in the margins of her argument throughout.”
—The New York Times

“Ace is a fantastic starting point for dismantling harmful sexual narratives and reimagining human connection as a broader, more equitable, enjoyable and free experience.”
—Washington Post

“The book allows us to imagine how much more we could get from our relationships if we were able to free ourselves from restrictive ideas of what we’re supposed to feel and do.”
—Rhaina Cohen, NPR

“Highly informative and readable.”
—Ms.

“One guarantee: Your mind will be blown by this book.”
—Shondaland

“Chen sets a thoughtful, rigorous, personally generous tone for what will hopefully be an expanding area of study.”
—Electric Literature

“This book isn’t just about asexuality and that’s what makes it such a vital read; it’s about society, and society’s rules and norms and expectations around sex, sexuality, and all forms of relationships. It’s so good and I want every person on earth to read it.”
—Sarah Nielsen, them

“Chen’s careful cultural analysis explores how societal norms limit understanding of sex and relationships and celebrates the breadth of sexuality and queerness.”
—Kundiman

“In her penetrating yet wittily kind voice, she describes many different visions of a sexually liberated society, if we could all just pay closer attention. She both imagines and demands a world through which each individual can move on their own terms, where any expression of orientation or attraction or desire can be as simple—as accepted and acceptable and easy and profound and taken at face value and understood—as ‘You’re my person.’”
—Women’s Review of Books

"Asexual and aromantic people are often dismissed or erased from the spectrum of queerness. Angela Chen’s book is key to the fight against that erasure.... [An] accessible guide to asexuality."
—BookRiot

“A necessary and thoughtful book that accessibly communicates a wide array of ace experiences.”
—Booklist

“Chen has produced a thoughtful look at what it means not to experience sexual attraction.”
—Library Journal

“Precision of language . . . is at the fore of Ace, a text that offers a nuanced exploration of sexual identities and a celebration of other types of intimacies beyond the confines of compulsory sexuality.”
—International Examiner

“Asexual people have always existed, but they have long gone unacknowledged. Even Alfred Kinsey, when developing his scale for sexual orientation, called asexual people Group X and excluded them from the spectrum. Journalist Chen interviewed nearly 100 asexual people—or “aces”—to fill in this historical gap and present various aspects of the asexual experience in scientific and cultural context. For example, Chen points to how the definition of hypoactive sexual desire disorder in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), the American Psychiatric Association's current compendium of psychological conditions, reinforces the idea that low sexual desire is something that needs to be cured. Although asexuality is often described as a lack of sexual attraction, Chen argues that 'we must consider that negative space can be more than an absent image.‘”
—Karen Kwon, Scientific American

“This excellent book successfully challenges many of society’s entrenched ideas around sex and desire. Reading it should be mandatory for all.”
—The Independent

“A great starting point for anyone who wants to discover more about this identity, for both those who have a feeling they could be ace and those who do not. It does a great job of providing context, real life examples, and points of consideration about this topic.”
—The Mancunion

“Ace is an excellent introduction to asexuality and its place on the wider spectrum of human sexuality. It is a mandatory read for anyone affected by sex and sexuality, which is, of course, everyone.”
—Feminism in India

“A long overdue addition to the catalog of sexuality writing and resources. Chen thoughtfully positions asexuality not as its own unique category or identity but as one more point on the vast, diverse spectrum of human sexual identities. A must-read for everyone: ace, allo, or anywhere in between.”
—Lux Alptraum, author of Faking It: The Lies Women Tell About Sex—and the Truths They Reveal

“Through painstaking research and her considerable skill as a storyteller, Angela Chen brings needed attention and nuance to an often overlooked spectrum of asexual experiences, encouraging readers to consider what exists and what is possible in terms of human connection, consent, understanding, and acceptance. A book that makes room for questions even as it illuminates, Ace should be viewed as a landmark work on culture and sexuality.”
—Nicole Chung, author of All You Can Ever Know: A Memoir

“Accessible and eloquently written, Ace sensitively and accurately spotlights an interconnected series of outsider experiences. Few asexual-spectrum narratives so authentically and diversely capture the truths, the quirks, the tragedies, and the triumphs of our lives without alienating non-ace readers or appealing only to one subset of the ace population. Ace creates an inclusive tapestry of validating and eye-opening narratives that will give some readers an experience they may have never had before: seeing our ‘anomalous’ perspectives and emotions given the sensitive examination and validation we’ve always been denied.”
—Julie Sondra Decker, author of The Invisible Orientation: An Introduction to Asexuality

“Chen’s tenacious search for the precise language to describe her experiences is deeply moving and relatable. This book will inspire you to interrogate every assumption you’ve made about yourself, your sexuality, and your relationships. Ace is a revelation. We can’t stop thinking about it.”
—Aminatou Sow and Ann Friedman, authors of Big Friendship: How We Keep Each Other Close

“Ace is nothing less than a cultural feat. It’s a powerful book that interweaves reporting and research about asexuality in ways that will remain with readers long after they’ve turned the last page. Ace announces a new dawn, one in which asexual people are voicing their experiences without fear or shame. They’re here, simply living and demystifying misconceptions in the process.”
—Evette Dionne, editor in chief of Bitch Media and author of Lifting As We Climb: Black Women’s Battle for the Ballot Box

Library Journal

09/01/2020

Writing as an asexual woman of color, journalist and editor Chen has produced a thoughtful if occasionally unfocused look at what it means not to experience sexual attraction. Chen sensitively discusses the social narratives and pressures around sex, and her solicitation of stories from other asexuals or "aces" of various backgrounds, ethnicities, and genders provides the most thought-provoking chapters, which detail how aces of color and disabled aces, in both the United States and the UK, find that their orientation intersects in complicated ways with stereotypes about other facets of their identities. Later chapters explore the wider topics of expectation of sex in relationships, issues of consent, nonsexual romantic friendships, and the marrying of feminism and liberalism with sexual permissiveness; while interesting, this results in the latter half of the book feeling less about asexuality and more about the complex and fluid nature of sexuality and relationships in general—certainly a valuable topic, but perhaps a potential fault for readers hoping for a more focused text. VERDICT Most likely to appeal readers of any orientation seeking a general text about asexuality and its place on the wider spectrum of human sexuality.—Kathleen McCallister, William & Mary Libs., Williamsburg, VA

NOVEMBER 2020 - AudioFile

Natalie Naudus’s lively narration paired with Chen’s engaging prose makes for a winning combination in this accessible and nuanced introduction to asexuality. Through the lens of her own experiences and those of other aces, Chen explores the multiplicity of ace identities, the history of the asexual movement, and the many lessons asexuality has to teach about sex, desire, consent, and the diversity of human relationships. Naudus strikes the perfect balance between intimacy and detachment. She handles the research and analysis in a clear, level voice. In the personal sections, she lets Chen’s anger, alienation, pride, and excitement shine through. Whether you’re a proud ace or have never heard of asexuality, this audiobook will shake up your understanding of human sexuality in the most invigorating way. L.S. © AudioFile 2020, Portland, Maine

Product Details

BN ID:	2940177140216
Publisher:	Penguin Random House
Publication date:	09/15/2020
Edition description:	Unabridged
Sales rank:	1,232,405

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