Table of Contents
The Bone-Crushing Principles of Complete and Utter Badassitude 1
Section I Antiquity: Destroying your enemies from the beginning of human history to the fall of Rome in 476 CE 7
1 Ramses II 9
Egyptian pharaoh who built an empire through propaganda, war, and giant sculptures of his grimacing face
2 Leonidas 15
His 300 Spartans fought the most famous last stand in history
3 Xenophon 23
Trapped deep behind enemy lines, he led a small band of mercenaries on an epic odyssey worthy of Homer himself
4 Alexander the Great 29
Conquered most of the known world before his thirty-third birthday
5 Chandragupta Maurya 37
Indian warlord who commanded an army of war elephants and an elite detachment of highly trained female bodyguards
6 Liu Ji 47
This impoverished peasant clawed his way from nothing to become the emperor of China's most powerful dynasty
7 Gaius Julius Caesar 55
Rome's most daring general was a military genius who laid the foundation for an empire that would last centuries
8 The Surena 63
Parthian warlord who inflicted, one of the worst defeats the Romans ever suffered
9 Julia Agrippina 69
The cunning black widow of Rome was the real power behind the throne of three emperors
10 Alaric the Bold 77
Ruthless ruler of the Visigoths and the first barbarian king to sack Rome in nearly a millennium
Section II The Middle Ages: Getting medieval on their asses: the fall of Rome to the destruction of Constantinople in 1453 85
11 Khalid bin Walid 87
The "Sword of Allah" crushed the Persian and Byzantine Empires with just a handful of battle-hardened warriors
12 Justinian II 95
Brutal Byzantine emperor who let nothing stand in the way ofhis quest for vengeance
13 Charles Martel 103
The Hammer of Christendom won the battle that would forever keep the Moors out of Western Europe
14 Wolf the Quarrelsome 109
Mysterious barbarian leader who only appears in history twice-and both times he's kicking someone's ass
15 William the Conqueror 117
This crazy bastard's ruthless invasion of England would change the course of history for centuries to come
16 Harald Hardrada 125
The last of the great Viking sea kings decapitated fools up and down the Mediterranean
17 El Cid Gampeador 133
Spain's most legendary knight, this hero of the Reconquista never tasted defeat on the field of battle
18 Tomae Gozen 139
Tough female samurai distinguished herself in countless battles, fighting with the ferocity of ten men
19 Genghis Khan 145
The tyrannical khan of khans forged history's most expansive empire-one giant pile of human skulls at a time
20 Vlad the Impaler 153
The real Count Dracula wasn't actually a vampire, but he wasn't exactly a nice guy, either
Section III The Age of Gunpowder: Blowing crap up from 1453 to the assassination of the Archduke Franz Ferdinand in 1914 159
21 Miyamoto Musashi 161
Wandering samurai swordsman won sixty duels between the ages of thirteen and thirty
22 Peter the Great 169
The almighty tsar of imperial Russia crushed his enemies and partied like a seventeenth-century rock star
23 Blackbeard 177
Many sailors believed this fearsome cutthroat was the devil incarnate-they may have been right
24 Anne Bonny 165
One of the only documented female pirates was also one of history's most dangerous
25 Peter Francisco 193
Unsung hero of the American Revolution who fought the redcoats with a massive five-foot-long broadsword
26 Horatio Nelson 201
One-eyed, one-armed British admiral who spent his life blasting French warships into driftwood
27 Napoleon Bonaparte 209
Corsican commoner seized control of France and repeatedly beat the crap out of Europe's most powerful empires
28 Aguslina of Aragon 219
The Maid of Saragossa fearlessly defended her city against a rampaging French army
29 Bass Reeves 227
Runaway slave who became one of most successful lawmen and gunfighters of the American West
30 Nikola Tesla 237
The greatest mad scientist of all time spent his final days developing a massive atomic death ray
Section IV The Modern Era: Mechanized chaos and full-auto destruction: World War I to 2009 243
31 Manfred von Richthofen 245
The Red Baron struck fear into the hearts of everything over the skies of Europe, except maybe a few species of birds
32 Henry Lincoln Johnson 255
From humble beginnings to American war hero, he took on the Germans in hand-to-hand combat to rescue his comrade
33 Eliot Ness 261
His small group of hard-boiled, "Untouchables" took down the most notorious crime lord in American history
34 Jack Churchill 269
Swashbuckling British officer fought World War II with a longbow, a broadsword, and a set of bagpipes
35 Irina Sebrova 277
Soviet pilot flew daring raids over German airspace at the head of an all-female bomber unit known as the "Night Witches"
36 Bhanbhagta Gurung 285
Gurkha soldier cleared out six enemy bunkers with grenades, a knife, a rock, and anything else he managed to get his hands on
37 George S. Patton 291
The toughest military commander in American history tossed out traditional military tactics in favor of all-out assaults
38 Carlos Hathcock 299
Operating deep behind enemy lines in-North Vietnam, this Marine sniper earned a reputation as the deadliest man alive
39 Bruce Lee 309
The legendary martial arts master honed his body to become the ultimate killing machine
40 Jonathan Netanyahu 317
Israeli Special Forces commander personally led one of the world's most successful counterterrorist operations
Bibliography 323
Acknowledgments 333
Illustration Credits 335