Counting on Death: A Marine Infantryman's Journey from the Front Lines of Combat to the Fight for Peace

by Joshua Shores, Kelsey R. Thompson USMC (Ret.) (Foreword by), Dan Bittner (Read by)

Overview

Joshua Shores was just nineteen years old when he deployed to Iraq in 2005. A Midwestern kid raised in a close-knit, supportive family, he had developed a strong sense of duty and honor.

Both sides of his family had proudly served their country, fostering a legacy of service that would guide his own path. Serving in Alpha Company, 1st Battalion, 5th Marine Regiment, Shores was a teenager among battle-hardened peers, far removed from the naïve assumptions of war that he had once held.

Based on meticulous notes taken throughout his deployment, this vivid account follows his experiences as he navigated the brutal realities of war. Shores’ grueling seven-month deployment was marked by day-to-day struggles and nightmarish events. Driven by a desire to redeem himself and reconcile the harrowing experiences of his first deployment, Shores chose to return to combat a second time, this time to Afghanistan with the first-ever Marine Special Operations Company Bravo. But upon returning home, he faced new and equally daunting battles—struggling with survivor’s guilt and a profound sense of being misunderstood by those who had once known him.

Illuminating both the triumphs and failures he encountered on the front lines, his memoir offers a deeply personal perspective on the true cost of combat, providing a modern-day perspective on the psychological and emotional impacts of battle. This is the harrowing story of a teenager’s descent into the darkest parts of the soul and his arduous quest for redemption and self-discovery, capturing the relentless emotional toll of war even after the physical battles end.

Counting on Death serves as both a guide for new warfighters and a candid exploration of a veteran’s battle to find peace after service.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9798228467415
Publisher:	Blackstone Publishing
Publication date:	10/18/2025
Product dimensions:	5.30(w) x 7.50(h) x (d)
Age Range:	18 Years

About the Author

Joshua Shores is a Marine and decorated combat veteran who served four and a half years in the Marine Corps infantry, with combat deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan. Honorably discharged as a staff sergeant, he went on to graduate cum laude with a degree in Business Management. Residing in the Midwest with his family, Joshua continues to pursue his passion for storytelling while also working as an entrepreneur.

Table of Contents

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Editorial Reviews

Joshua Shores delivers an unforgettable account of war, trauma, and the cost of survival. Challenging the glorification of war and honoring the complexity of those who fight, this book marks a vital contribution to the war on terror.”

author of Life and Death at Abbey Gate Mikael Cook

Josh Shores’s Counting on Death details his Marine Corps service in Iraq and Afghanistan. It is revealing, riveting and often heartbreaking. His firsthand account of patrolling the market area in Ramadi in a high-back Humvee and the consequences of being at the receiving end of improvised explosive devices (IEDs) is written in such a way that the reader will be able to experience it. Shores excelled in combat and was promoted through the ranks to staff sergeant, yet in his memoir, he often speaks of his mistakes, poor choices, bad behavior and the toll it took on his personal life. His introspective has been years in the making and it took a great amount of courage to tell it in the hopes that future veterans will benefit from it.

Christy W. Sauro Jr.

"Counting on Death is a raw, unfiltered memoir that pulls you into the heart of combat and the quiet, crushing battles that follow. Joshua Shores delivers an unforgettable account of war, trauma, and the cost of survival. Challenging the glorification of war and honoring the complexity of those who fight, this book marks a vital contribution to the war on terror.

Mikael Cook

Counting on Death is a raw, unflinching memoir that rips the curtain off showing the brutal realities of war. Through Josh’s unforgettable recollections of heart-pounding raids, narrowly avoiding death, and moments of dark humor amidst the carnage of Iraq and Afghanistan, this book reveals the untold truths of combat. As a retired enlisted Marine and Marine Special Operations Officer, I'm humbled from serving beside America's best whose raw valor and human vulnerabilities tell a story of both extraordinary sacrifice and irreversible change. They fight not just out of duty, but for the unbreakable bond and fierce love they share with their Marine brothers. This is not just a recount of military operations; it’s a tribute to the indomitable spirit of the grunts who fight in the severest crucibles of war.

Major Fred Galvin

A dedicated U.S. Marine takes us on a truthful journey through combat and his own search for meaning.

Johnnie Clark

Counting on Death is not just a war memoir—it is a reckoning. Joshua Shores offers a brutally honest account of his service with Alpha Company, 1st Battalion, 5th Marines in Ramadi, Iraq, and the lingering battles that followed him home. This book lays bare the internal moral injuries that so many combat veterans carry but rarely voice. It is a courageous and unflinching meditation on guilt, brotherhood, survival, and the long road to healing. Shores doesn’t glorify war—he interrogates it with raw clarity, calling us to confront the cost of our decisions in uniform and as a nation. Every Marine, every American, should read this.

Lt. Col. Thomas Schueman

This book lays bare the internal moral injuries that so many combat veterans carry but rarely voice. It is a courageous and unflinching meditation on guilt, brotherhood, survival, and the long road to healing. Shores doesn’t glorify war—he interrogates it with raw clarity, calling us to confront the cost of our decisions in uniform and as a nation. Every Marine, every American, should read this.”

Lieutenant Colonel Thomas Schueman