How Should a Christian Date?: It's Not as Complicated as You Think

by Eric Demeter

Overview

Pitch the Christian dating rulebook out the window. There’s a better way!

No matter what you might have heard, God didn’t mandate a divine way to date. What He did do, in the Bible, is lay out principles for wise and healthy relational living among believers. His boundaries for us are wise and good. But exactly how you apply God’s principles to your dating life is up to you to figure out. All you need is guidance, not micromanagement.

How Should a Christian Date? doesn’t try to boss you around. It just offers wisdom about the relevant principles in God’s Word. Eric Demeter—a single guy who has given this subject a lot of thought—separates the truths of Scripture from the baggage of Christian dating subculture. He talks to you like a big brother or favorite uncle, not your mother. You’ll cover topics such as:

• Busting 12 Myths of Christian Dating
• How to Meet People & Have a Good First Date
• Clearing the Fog in Sex and Physical Affection
• Getting the Best from a Breakup
• Take Dating One Stage at a Time

There isn’t one “Christian” way to date. But there are ways that Christians should handle themselves while dating . . . and those are the truths to live by.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9780802420848
Publisher:	Moody Publishers
Publication date:	09/07/2021
Pages:	224
Product dimensions:	7.90(w) x 5.20(h) x 0.70(d)

About the Author

ERIC DEMETER (B.S., Purdue University; M.A., Bethel University) is a relationship and conflict resolution specialist with advanced studies in mediation, peacemaking and negotiation from the Korbel School of International Studies at the University of Denver and Peacemaker Ministries. He is currently a missionary with Youth With a Mission (YWAM) based in Athens, Greece where he disciples young people from the Middle East, and teaches conflict resolution and healthy relationships to YWAM staff and missionary students. His experiences growing up listening to heavy metal, working alongside ex-convicts, and being raised in the Roman Catholic tradition give him the ability to connect well with people of diverse belief systems. He considers every reader a friend and challenges everyone to become more like Christ in everything they do.

Table of Contents

Introduction: Less Pain and More Joy in Dating 7

1 Is Marriage Better than Singleness? 15

2 Why Is Christian Dating So Weird? 27

3 "Scalpel, Please." Dissecting the Word Date 43

4 Busting Twelve Christian Dating Myths 59

5 A 4,000-Pound Paper Weight: A Sturdy Frame Supports Dating 73

6 Follow the Stages for a Great Relationship 85

7 Make a List but Avoid Creating Frankenstein 101

8 Unfriend-Zoning People and Other Ways to Meet Dates 119

9 Sex, True Purity, and Almost Jumping Out of a Moving Car 135

10 Getting the Best from a Breakup 155

11 Fall in Love with Your Cheesecake 169

12 You Found "The One" When You Can Love Like a Prince 185

Acknowledgments 199

Notes 201

About the Author 211

What People are Saying About This

From the Publisher

Praise for How Should a Christian Date?

“I’ve known Eric for a lot of years, and, as his pastor, I’ve walked with him through the ups and downs of his own dating experiences. His stories will make you laugh, cry, and at times, even wince. These pages are full of clear insight and practical wisdom. I hope that the lessons he’s learned and the scars he’s earned can become a source of wisdom and healing for you wherever you are on your journey.”
—GLENN PACKIAM
Associate Senior Pastor, New Life Church
Author, Blessed Broken Given

“This is a very current, relevant, and practical look at Christian dating. Reading this book has been a great delight as Eric has written in a very open and vulnerable gritty and genuine way. There is no pretentiousness here, no judgment, or criticism, or a list of dos and don’ts! It is like having a good coach coming alongside to encourage and hopefully advise, but always with your success and very best at heart. Wisdom learned from life’s experiences, not just from reading a book. Eric gives wise guidelines of how to live and love by celebrating singleness, cultivating friendships, and building good foundations and character before finding a future good mate. Becoming emotionally healthy is key to marrying out of want, not out of need.”
—MARK PARKER
YWAM NZ DTS training leader, teacher, elder

“Eric Demeter writes passionately and practically to Christ followers who are seeking to do the ‘dating thing’ well. He doesn’t try to prescribe a template for the way to date, but rather offers helpful prompts for those wishing to pursue healthy dating relationships. If you’ve been around the dating block or are new to the process, I recommend you give this book a read!”
—SHAWN HOLTGREN
Vice President for Student Development, Bethel University

“An immensely readable and practical guide for developing healthy habits in dating. Eric gives us biblically sound advice for growing ourselves, respecting others, and honoring God in a culture that says ‘anything goes.’”
—LISA ANDERSON
Director of Boundless.org, author of The Dating Manifesto

Editorial Reviews

Praise for How Should a Christian Date?

“I’ve known Eric for a lot of years, and, as his pastor, I’ve walked with him through the ups and downs of his own dating experiences. His stories will make you laugh, cry, and at times, even wince. These pages are full of clear insight and practical wisdom. I hope that the lessons he’s learned and the scars he’s earned can become a source of wisdom and healing for you wherever you are on your journey.”
—GLENN PACKIAM
Associate Senior Pastor, New Life Church
Author, Blessed Broken Given

“This is a very current, relevant, and practical look at Christian dating. Reading this book has been a great delight as Eric has written in a very open and vulnerable gritty and genuine way. There is no pretentiousness here, no judgment, or criticism, or a list of dos and don’ts! It is like having a good coach coming alongside to encourage and hopefully advise, but always with your success and very best at heart. Wisdom learned from life’s experiences, not just from reading a book. Eric gives wise guidelines of how to live and love by celebrating singleness, cultivating friendships, and building good foundations and character before finding a future good mate. Becoming emotionally healthy is key to marrying out of want, not out of need.”
—MARK PARKER
YWAM NZ DTS training leader, teacher, elder

“Eric Demeter writes passionately and practically to Christ followers who are seeking to do the ‘dating thing’ well. He doesn’t try to prescribe a template for the way to date, but rather offers helpful prompts for those wishing to pursue healthy dating relationships. If you’ve been around the dating block or are new to the process, I recommend you give this book a read!”
—SHAWN HOLTGREN
Vice President for Student Development, Bethel University

“An immensely readable and practical guide for developing healthy habits in dating. Eric gives us biblically sound advice for growing ourselves, respecting others, and honoring God in a culture that says ‘anything goes.’”
—LISA ANDERSON
Director of Boundless.org, author of The Dating Manifesto

From the Publisher