Like most brides on their wedding day, you no doubt were filled with love for your husband and the hope of a happy life together. But perhaps today, as the realities of life together have settled in, those happy expectations are going unfulfilled. And it's tempting to think, "If only my husband would change, I'd be happy."
That myth is but one of many that Rhonda Stoppe dispels in her easy-to-read exploration of what it takes to experience a truly happy marriage. In the process, she addresses such important topics as
- understanding your husband's need for your unconditional respect
- rekindling the love that drew you to your husband in the first place
- refusing to believe the lie that you'd be happier married to someone else
- learning to be content in the midst of financial struggles
- thinking about sex from a biblical worldview
If you desire to rekindle the love and hope you felt on your wedding day, this book will go a long way toward making that dream come true.
Contains discussion questions and personal reflections at the end of each chapter.
|Publisher:||Harvest House Publishers|
|Product dimensions:||5.50(w) x 8.40(h) x 2.20(d)|
|Age Range:||3 Months|
About the Author
Rhonda Stoppe is the No Regrets Woman. With more than 20 years of experience as a pastor's wife, mom, mentor, author, and speaker, Rhonda uses humor and honest communication to help women build No Regrets Lives. She and her husband live their real-life romance in northern California, and have four grown children and eight grandchildren. NoRegretsWoman.com
Table of Contents
1 If He Would Change, I'd Be Happy He Was Never Meant to Be Your Happily-Ever-After 9
2 I Will Respect Him When He Earns My Respect The Concept of Unconditional Respect 23
3 I'm Falling Out of Love with Him Staying in Love Is All in Your Mind 39
4 Our Kids Would Obey if He Were a Better Father Marriage Survival Guide for Parents 53
5 I Would Be Happier Married to Someone Else The Grass Is Not Greener on the Other Side of the Fence 71
6 He Would Love Me More if I Were Prettier The Secret to Keeping His Attention 89
7 All He Wants Is Sex When You Long for Romance 107
8 More Money Equals Less Stress Grow Rich in Ways You Never Imagined 123
9 Every Couple Fights Eight Steps to Making Peace 141
10 Our Marriage Would Be Better if Bad Things Would Stop Happening The Joy of the lord Is Your Strength 159
11 If Momma Ain't Happy, Ain't Nobody Happy It's Not Your Husband's Job to Make You Happy 177
12 Happily-Ever-After Is a Fairy Tale Ten Keys to a More Fulfilling Marriage 193
Appendix: How to Have a Relationship with Jesus 211
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
When I first saw this book, I was intrigued by the title. It caught my attention because I know I've made that statement before, either to my husband or to myself. So, I thought "why not?" Let me tell you how happy I am that I picked up this book. Rhonda Stoppe is an excellent author. Her conversational tone throughout the book made me feel at ease, even during the topics that pricked at my consciousness. I felt like I was sitting down with my girlfriends for a nice chat every time I picked up this book. While a lot of the topics addressed in this book I haven't experienced in this stage in my marriage (2 years in September!), I will definitely read this book and refer to it again throughout our marriage. The wisdom I've gleaned from it's pages is immeasurable. I could have little orange sticky note tabs all over the book, but I tried to contain myself! Here are a few of the points that really stuck out to me: "The key to having an all-out love for your husband lies in how well you love God." (pg. 16) "The first insight into building a love that lasts is to take your focus off of how much you want to be loved by your husband." (Now, I'll admit, I had to really let that soak before I could appreciate it's truth - pg. 39) "When you are selfishly devoted to yourself rather than to God and others - in this case, your husband - you will resist giving of yourself to him selflessly." (pg. 111) "When you commit to seeking first His kingdom and His righteousness, you will find contentment and peace in your marriage--and life." (pg. 136) "It is not enough to merely read the Bible and pray for a marriage free from conflict." (pg. 143) Lastly, the prayer for her husband she wrote on page 187 is a beautiful model prayer that I wouldn't hesitate to say over my hubby regularly. Overall, whether you're in your first years or in the thick of your marriage, it's never too early or too late to read this fantastic book. *I received a complimentary copy from the author through the Litfuse blogging program in exchange for my honest review.*
And I thought... A very modern approach excellent for all women. Although this reader didn't care for the title. And actually neither did The Cowboy. I get the concept. But, I think that there are women that wouldn't buy the book based on the title. Especially if your in a marriage that is struggling. There have been times in my marriage that if I had bought this title I wouldn't have left it laying around for The Cowboy to see. With that said . . . I encourage you to buy it anyway. The teaching is Biblically sound. And in my opinion if Elizabeth Barnes endorsed it (and she did) then you need to read it! This one is a keeper for me (along with the titles by Elizabeth Barnes). It was a simple read. Filled with humor and light heartedness but also filled with great insight and sound scriptural advice. I received a lovely complimentary signed copy from Litfuse in exchange for my honest review.
Rhonda Stoppe in her new book, “If My Husband Would Change, I’d Be Happy” published by Harvest House gives us And Other Myths Wives Believe From the back cover: Like most brides on their wedding day, you no doubt were filled with love for your husband and the hope of a happy life together. But perhaps today, as the realities of life together have settled in, those happy expectations are going unfulfilled. And it’s tempting to think, “If only my husband would change, I’d be happy.” That myth is but one of many that Rhonda Stoppe dispels in her easy-to-read exploration of what it takes to experience a truly happy marriage. In the process, she addresses such important topics as understanding your husband’s need for your unconditional respect rekindling the love that drew you to your husband in the first place refusing to believe the lie that you’d be happier married to someone else learning to be content in the midst of financial struggles thinking about sex from a biblical worldview If you desire to rekindle the love and hope you felt on your wedding day, this book will go a long way toward making that dream come true. Contains discussion questions and personal reflections at the end of each chapter. Ladies, it is official what you brought to the wedding were all kinds of stories that he could not possibly live up to. Honestly there is so much men have to live up to that having a whole bunch of myths operating against certainly is not going to help. Rhonda Stoppe examines twelve myths that women bring into the marriage. At the close of each chapter her husband, Steve, has written a section called “From a Husband’s Perspective.” As you read what he says, you will not only glean a man’s perspective, but also insights from the many years of Biblical counseling he has done with husbands and wives. At the end of each chapter you will find two sections called, “Thinking It Through” and “Living It Out.” These will allow you to study and apply the truths you’ve learned. Are you married? No matter how good, or bad, your marriage is this book will make it better. Thinking of getting married? This book will give you new thoughts. Know others that are married? This book can help them too. No matter where you are in life I believe this book would be beneficial for any stage of marriage you are at. Everyone should have this book. Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book for free from Litfuse Publicity Group for this review. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”
Rhonda Stoppe’s writing style is conversational and engaging, which helps puts readers at ease. Because, if you’re picking up a book with this kind of title, unless you’re doing so for review purposes, you probably are hurting. Your marriage isn’t turning out the way you expected it to, the way you dreamed it would, and you’ve probably become very disillusioned with love and romance and all those fairy tale imaginings we women carry close to our hearts. You need someone to sit down next to you – knee to knee – and hold your hands, look in your eyes, and tell you that they get it, that you’re not alone, and that there is hope. A book like this, with Rhonda Stoppe at the helm, is the next best thing. Perfect for newlyweds and “oldyweds” (like me lol), If My Husband Would Change, I’d Be Happy gives hope and practical resources to wives who are at the end of their patience, the end of their love, and perhaps the end of their marriage. It’s engaging and conversational while at the same time packed with solid truth, Scriptural support, and wise advice. I also really enjoyed the “From a Husband’s Perspective” at the end of each chapter, written (as you may have already guessed) by the author’s husband. The chapters also end with two sections called “Thinking It Through” and “Living It Out” and links are provided throughout to Rhonda’s website NoRegretsWoman.com for additional supplemental material. These all combine together to make this an excellent resource for small groups too. I know I will be re-reading this book often to keep the truths in it at the forefront of my mind and my marriage. (I received a copy of this book in exchange for only my honest review.)
There are lots of non-fiction, how-to, self-help, let-me-give-you-advice books out there on how to make yourself better, your lives better, your world better BUT very few that I've ever read will meet you where you are and speak Truth-God's Truth-into your heart or in this case marriage. Until now. If you're like me you're probably thinking, "Hey, my marriage is good. My husband and I love each other. We don't fight much. We're making it." That's what I was thinking before I picked up this book and boy, oh boy-it took only one chapter to convict me that I was wrong. Not that my marriage isn't good-it is. But that my marriage could be better! So much better and it wasn't my husband who needed to change-it was me. Rhonda Stoppe offers this book as an instrument to help women become the kind of wives God wants us to be to our men. Filled with Scripture to encourage and reveal God's desire for us, I found myself having to admit there were definitely areas in my role as a wife I could improve upon. And what was most revealing is that it wasn't because I wanted to be a perfect wife but because I wanted to honor God in my role as help-mate to my husband. Rhonda's husband, Pastor Steve Stoppe gives readers a glimpse into the husband's thoughts at the end of each chapter, which I found helpful and reassuring. There's also a Thinking It Through and Living It Out section at the end of each chapter, which help the reader apply new found truths to their lives in a tangible way. The enemy likes nothing more than division. In countries, in communities, and especially in families. I believe this book is a great tool for women to have to ensure unity, peace, love, and hope rule their marriage. Women who are engaged to be married and women who are married will find this a great resource to be the kind of wives who will bring honor their Lord, their husbands, and their families for generations to come. *I received a copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for my honest review.