I've Had to Think Up a Way to Survive: On Trauma, Persistence, and Dolly Parton

by Lynn Melnick

Overview

“An ode to storytelling itself . . . A gorgeous and heart-rending story of survival.”—Melissa Febos, author of Girlhood

A moving and essential exploration of what it takes to find your voice as a woman, a survivor, an artist, and an icon.

The first time Lynn Melnick listened to a Dolly Parton song in full, she was 14 years old, in the triage room of a Los Angeles hospital, waiting to be admitted to a drug rehab program. Already in her young life as a Jewish teen in the 1980s, she had been the victim of rape, abuse, and trauma, and her path to healing would be long. But in Parton’s words and music, she recognized a fellow survivor.

In this powerful, incisive work of social- and self-exploration, Melnick blends personal essay with cultural criticism to explore Parton’s dual identities as feminist icon and objectified sex symbol, identities that reflect the author’s own fraught history with rape culture and the arduous work of reclaiming her voice. Each chapter engages with the artistry and impact of one of Parton’s songs, as Melnick reckons with violence, misogyny, creativity, parenting, friendship, sex, love, and the consolations and cruelties of religion. Bold and inventive, I’ve Had to Think Up a Way to Survive gives us an accessible and memorable framework for understanding our times and a revelatory account of survival, persistence, and self-discovery.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781954118478
Publisher:	Spiegel & Grau
Publication date:	08/01/2023
Pages:	280
Product dimensions:	5.50(w) x 8.40(h) x 0.90(d)

About the Author

Lynn Melnick is the author of three books of poetry and a contributor to Not That Bad: Dispatches from Rape Culture. Her poems have appeared in the New Republic, the New Yorker, and the Paris Review; her essays have appeared in Jewish Currents, LA Review of Books, and Poetry Daily. Born in Indianapolis, she grew up in Los Angeles and currently lives in Brooklyn.

Table of Contents

• Introduction: Seven Bridges Road
• Chapter One: Why’d You Come in Here Lookin’ Like That
• Chapter Two: Steady as the Rain
• Chapter Three: The Seeker
• Chapter Four: Here You Come Again
• Chapter Five: Jolene
• Chapter Six: The Grass Is Blue
• Chapter Seven: Coat of Many Colors
• Chapter Eight: Islands in the Stream
• Chapter Nine: Do I Ever Cross Your Mind
• Chapter Ten: Will He Be Waiting for Me
• Chapter Eleven: Down from Dover
• Chapter Twelve: Silver Dagger
• Chapter Thirteen: Don’t Think Twice
• Chapter Fourteen: I Don’t Believe You’ve Met My Baby
• Chapter Fifteen: Little Sparrow
• Chapter Sixteen: 9 to 5
• Chapter Seventeen: Two Doors Down
• Chapter Eighteen: Put a Little Love in Your Heart
• Chapter Nineteen: Blue Smoke
• Chapter Twenty: Bargain Store
• Chapter Twenty-One: The Story
• Acknowledgments: I Will Always Love You
• References and Resources

What People are Saying About This

Melissa Febos

Lynn Melnick’s new book is an ode to storytelling itself, how it keeps us alive and makes our lives more worth living, whether in music, poems, or even a biographical memoir that winds two stories together to make something stronger and more beautiful than either would be alone. A gorgeous and heartrending story of survival.

Hanif Abdurraqib

It is a mighty task to write generously, robustly, and imaginatively about Dolly Parton, who already exists so broadly at the intersection of many American imaginations, all of them flourishing and fluorescent. But what Lynn Melnick has managed is beyond mere tribute, and beyond biography—it is a rich, close reading of multiple lives that sometimes find themselves touching. The narratives in this book are masterfully presented and do justice not only to the life of its central subject but also to the life of its writer.

Editorial Reviews

It is a mighty task to write generously, robustly, and imaginatively about Dolly Parton, who already exists so broadly at the intersection of many American imaginations, all of them flourishing and fluorescent. But what Lynn Melnick has managed is beyond mere tribute, and beyond biography—it is a rich, close reading of multiple lives, that sometimes find themselves touching. The narratives in this book are masterfully presented and do justice not only to the life of its central subject but also the life of its writer.”—Hanif Abdurraqib

“The author writes with remarkable vulnerability and candor yet ensures that the often-painful memories she relates don’t cloud her critical gaze. She moves gracefully between confessional and analytical registers, her prose both sharp and full of heart.”—The Atlantic

“A riveting blend of cultural criticism and memoir…In her quest to ‘be more Dollylike, rising again and again from the embers of expectation,’ Melnick offers a gorgeous story of survival and self-discovery.”—Publishers Weekly (starred review)

“I’ve Had to Think Up a Way to Survive is more than an artful memoir; it is thought-provoking cultural analysis of a beloved icon whose relevance endures.”—BookPage

“Discarding the societal demand to keep quiet about her own trauma, Melnick structures the book as an inquiry into the music of Dolly Parton that ‘unmired’ her when she first found herself in a drug rehab program as a teenager in the 1980s. It’s Dolly Parton’s music that offers transcendence in Melnick’s life from then on, and she scrutinizes Dolly’s songs and their personal and cultural impact in a mixture of biography, critical investigation, music journalism, social history, and invocation. ‘It’s a refusal of secrets,’ Melnick writes in the final chapter about a song that Dolly is singing, but this is also a perfect summation of her book.”—BOMB

“A treasure for Parton fans . . . [Melnick's] book is a testament to the power of storytelling and to the help we sometimes get from people who don't even know we needed them.”—Minneapolis Star Tribune

“Like Dolly’s voice, Melnick’s tone is casual and joyous, yet still defiant, cogently seeking commonality between its two subjects and showing how she and Parton have each performed their womanliness—and all its concomitant mess . . . Carefully researched and at times uncomfortably honest, I’ve Had to Think Up a Way to Survive also avoids hagiography and handles the problematic aspects of Dolly better than most . . . I’ve Had to Think Up a Way to Survive is, at core, about the Appalachian skill of 'always being aware of the terrible' while steadfastly and laughingly avoiding its grip.”—The Georgia Review

“Melnick lovingly chronicles how Parton’s expansive songwriting catalog and her six decades as a household icon have been inextricable from Melnick’s own journey from a Jewish teenage addict to an accomplished artist.”—Lilith

“[Melnick] deals with past trauma by analogizing her own life to the country legend's. Although Melnick and Parton didn't seem to have much more in common on the surface, discovering their similarities is at the center of this moving journey.”—The Boot, 10 Best Country Music Books of 2022

“There is rich texture in the details Melnick shares of her life, which she weaves into Parton’s history and the backstory of each song, with Parton’s hardships and struggles as much an inspiration to Melnick as the star’s thrilling success . . . This is absolutely the book for any Dolly Parton fan, full of anecdotes and intricate history of The Leading Lady of Country. It was empowering and inspiring to read the stories of these women (Parton and Melnick) and to know they have made something of the ashes left when others lit a match.”—Southern Review of Books 

“Lynn Melnick's new book is an ode to storytelling itself, how it keeps us alive and makes our lives more worth living, whether in music, poems, or even a biographical memoir that winds two stories together to make something stronger and more beautiful than either alone. A gorgeous and heart-rending story of survival.”—Melissa Febos

From the Publisher

★ 07/04/2022

Poet Melnick (Refusenik) delivers a riveting blend of cultural criticism and memoir in this paean to Dolly Parton, “an icon of feminine strength.” Melnick first heard Parton at age 14 in 1988 while she was checking into a drug rehabilitation program. Recounting Parton’s “Islands in the Stream,” Melnick writes, “the multifaceted clarity of her voice hooked me instantly.” Two decades later, Melnick found herself in search of Parton again, while vacationing at Parton’s theme park, Dollywood, and working through the “retraumatiz” brought by a book she’d recently published about her trauma (including surviving rape as a child). Though belittled on account of her looks, the multitalented musician and savvy businesswoman’s songs, Melnick argues, reckoned with hard-hitting themes—from a response to patriarchy and rape culture in “Jolene” to a meditation on the pain of poverty in “Coat of Many Colors.” In contemplative prose, Melnick movingly recalls how Parton’s words shepherded her through life: “The Grass Is Blue,” for instance, conjures Melnick’s struggles to protect her preadolescent daughter, while “Little Sparrow” gave her the strength to deal with the return of an abusive ex. In her quest to “be more Dollylike, rising again and again from the embers of expectation,” Melnick offers a gorgeous story of survival and self-discovery. Die-hard Dolly fans won’t want to miss this. (Oct.)

Publishers Weekly

Melnick’s book is about the author’s vicarious, identity-forming relationship with a cultural figure. Each of its 21 chapters is organized around a particular song, so we learn everything she was able to find out about how Dolly...wrote or recorded that song, what the press said about it, and what the artist herself said about it in interviews and talk show appearances. Moreover, each chapter delves into what the title song means in Melnick’s life and what it says about related cultural issues. In that way, it’s a blend of memoir and cultural criticism, as well as a wealth of information.

Chapter 16

A fierce resistance to that which could destroy us or destroy our spirits (patriarchy, capitalism, drugs) drives this potent work of music criticism forward, with deft prose that breathtakingly weaves biography and personal narrative.

PopMatters

A fierce resistance to that which could destroy us or destroy our spirits (patriarchy, capitalism, drugs) drives this potent work of music criticism forward, with deft prose that breathtakingly weaves biography and personal narrative.

The Common

[Writing] with magnetic directness, poet Lynn Melnick...does more here than connect her personal story to Dolly Parton’s. Her book gives the reader the tools for making meaning of perilous times, as she lays out the impact of misogyny and violence on the culture at large, all the while honoring the singular voice that powers her resilience.

Electric Literature

I’ve Had to Think Up a Way to Survive is more than an artful memoir; it is thought-provoking cultural analysis of a beloved icon whose relevance endures.

BookPage

Each chapter in [I've Had to Think Up a Way to Survive] glances at the author's life through a different song penned by Parton. [Melnick] deals with past trauma by analogizing her own life to the country legend's. Although Melnick and Parton didn't seem to have much more in common on the surface, discovering their similarities is at the center of this moving journey.

"10 Best Country Music Books of 2022" The Boot

Discarding the societal demand to keep quiet about her own trauma, Melnick structures the book as an inquiry into the music of Dolly Parton that 'unmired' her when she first found herself in a drug rehab program as a teenager in the 1980s. It’s Dolly Parton’s music that offers transcendence in Melnick’s life from then on, and she scrutinizes Dolly’s songs and their personal and cultural impact in a mixture of biography, critical investigation, music journalism, social history, and invocation. 'It’s a refusal of secrets,' Melnick writes in the final chapter about a song that Dolly is singing, but this is also a perfect summation of her book.

BOMB Magazine

Melnick lovingly chronicles how Parton’s expansive songwriting catalog and her six decades as a household icon have been inextricable from Melnick’s own journey from a Jewish teenage addict to an accomplished artist.

Lilith

There is rich texture in the details Melnick shares of her life, which she weaves into Parton’s history and the backstory of each song, with Parton’s hardships and struggles as much an inspiration to Melnick as the star’s thrilling success...This is absolutely the book for any Dolly Parton fan, full of anecdotes and intricate history of The Leading Lady of Country. It was empowering and inspiring to read the stories of these women (Parton and Melnick) and to know they have made something of the ashes left when others lit a match.

Southern Review of Books

This book revels unabashedly in the turmoil of both women’s lives. Like Dolly’s voice, Melnick’s tone is casual and joyous, yet still defiant, cogently seeking commonality between its two subjects and showing how she and Parton have each performed their womanliness—and all its concomitant mess...Carefully researched and at times uncomfortably honest, I’ve Had to Think Up a Way to Survive also avoids hagiography and handles the problematic aspects of Dolly better than most...I’ve Had to Think Up a Way to Survive is, at core, about the Appalachian skill of 'always being aware of the terrible' while steadfastly and laughingly avoiding its grip.

The Georgia Review

[This] brilliant critical memoir...[is] a lyrical, moving, and exacting meditation on Dolly Parton's music and her influence on Melnick’s life.

Columbia News

[Melnick] writes with remarkable vulnerability and candor yet ensures that the often-painful memories she relates don’t cloud her critical gaze. She moves gracefully between confessional and analytical registers, her prose both sharp and full of heart.

The Atlantic

Lynn Melnick’s new book is an ode to storytelling itself, how it keeps us alive and makes our lives more worth living, whether in music, poems, or even a biographical memoir that winds two stories together to make something stronger and more beautiful than either would be alone. A gorgeous and heartrending story of survival.

Melissa Febos

It is a mighty task to write generously, robustly, and imaginatively about Dolly Parton, who already exists so broadly at the intersection of many American imaginations, all of them flourishing and fluorescent. But what Lynn Melnick has managed is beyond mere tribute, and beyond biography—it is a rich, close reading of multiple lives that sometimes find themselves touching. The narratives in this book are masterfully presented and do justice not only to the life of its central subject but also to the life of its writer.

Hanif Abdurraqib