No More Neckties: A Memoir in Essays

No More Neckties: A Memoir in Essays

by Loren A. Olson MD
No More Neckties: A Memoir in Essays

No More Neckties: A Memoir in Essays

by Loren A. Olson MD


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Readers loved psychiatrist Loren Olson's earlier memoir, Finally Out, but many also wanted to know more about his personal story. Dr. Olson answers those questions in this collection of unsentimental and unapologetic essays that are gritty, powerful, and relatable. He shares intensely personal stories about love and heartbreak, tragedy and loss, betrayal and forgiveness, and the fears and opportunities of aging. The memoir-in-essay format invites readers to stop and reflect on their own lives. The stories offer hope and will facilitate discussions about the hard stuff that many families endure yet keep silent about. Dr. Olson reveals how sharing secrets brings us closer together even when things are difficult to talk about.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781737995623
Publisher: Oak Lane Press
Publication date: 05/17/2022
Pages: 280
Product dimensions: 6.00(w) x 1.25(h) x 9.00(d)

About the Author

Loren A. Olson, MD, is a board-certified psychiatrist who came out as gay at the age of forty. A father and grandfather, he is also a Distinguished Life Fellow of the American Psychiatric Association and a recipient of the Exemplary Psychiatrist Award from the National Alliance on Mental Illness. He has spoken about mature gay men and their families throughout the United States and Canada and at the World Congress of Psychiatry in Prague. In 2009, Dr. Olson legally married Doug Mortimer, his partner of thirty-five years.

Table of Contents

Preface ix

Illusions of My Father 1

Fitting in Is Not Belonging 13

Lefty 21

Suicide and Other Family Secrets 29

Who's the Boss of You? 35

Yoga for the Penis 39

When Cardinals Appear, Angels Are Near 47

Empathy and Dissent 51

I Didn't Expect Sex to Be This Difficult 55

Tarnished Mettle 63

I'll Have Just One of Those Brownies 77

You Are Delicious to Someone 83

The Illusion of Truth 91

Is It Cheating If It's with Another Dude? 97

What Do You Call Men Who Have Sex with Men? 103

Can I Pray Away the Gay? 107

My Disappointing Introduction to Gay Sex 113

Lord, Make Me Chaste-Just Not Yet 123

Dying for Someone to Talk To 137

I Knew I Would Have an Affair; I Didn't Expect It Would Be with Another Man 143

I Didn't Want to Betray My Wife Again 153

Outed on the Front Page 159

Everybody Already Knows 163

A Husband or a Dog? Don't Make Me Choose 171

I Did Drag Once and That Was Enough 179

Cowboy Up: Gay Men in Rural America 181

Is There Cake at a Gay Wedding? 191

Without Intimacy, Your Partner Will Look Elsewhere 199

AOL 205

A Blue Christmas 215

Sometimes Love Hurts 221

Betrayer and Betrayed 233

I Blew Out My Knee Having Sex 239

Don't Call Me Homosexual 247

"What's the Q in LGBTQ, Grandpa?" 251

Aging Allows Us to Say "Fuck Off" 255

About the Author 265

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