Pucked Up Love

When I see the ad in Portland Alternative's "Love Wanted" section, I can't resist the urge to respond. Yes, it's dangerous--as a star forward for the Badgers I have a reputation to protect--but I miss the thrill of calling the shots in the bedroom and reading this ad is the first time I've laughed in months.Wanted: Discreet Dominant gentleman to teach maybe-submissive woman the rules of the game. No whips, chains, paddles, ropes, or toys. No nookie. No creepy stuff. No butt stuff. No gluten...