Stick a Flag in It: 1,000 years of bizarre history from Britain and beyond

by Arran Lomas

Overview

From the Norman Invasion in 1066 to the eve of the First World War, Stick a Flag in It is a thousand-year jocular journey through the history of Britain and its global empire. 

The British people have always been eccentric, occasionally ingenious and, sure, sometimes unhinged—from mad monarchs to mass-murdering lepers. Here, Arran Lomas shows us how they harnessed those traits to forge the British nation, and indeed the world, we know today. Follow history’s greatest adventurers from the swashbuckling waters of the Caribbean to the vast white wasteland of the Antarctic wilderness, like the British spy who infiltrated a top-secret Indian brothel and the priest who hid inside a wall but forgot to bring a packed lunch. At the very least you’ll discover Henry VIII’s favorite ass-wipe, whether the flying alchemist ever made it from Scotland to France, and the connection between Victorian coffee houses and dildos. Forget what you were taught in school—this is history like you’ve never heard it before, full of captivating historical quirks that will make you laugh out loud and scratch your head in disbelief.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781800181175
Publisher:	Unbound
Publication date:	08/09/2022
Pages:	416
Sales rank:	508,095
Product dimensions:	5.12(w) x 7.88(h) x (d)

About the Author

Arran Lomas is the creator of Thoughty2, a YouTube channel with 3.7 million subscribers and over 630 million views that makes mind-blowing factual videos on the weirdest, wackiest and most interesting topics. He lives in North Yorkshire. @Thoughty_2 www.youtube.com/user/Thoughty2

Table of Contents

• 1066–1100 INVASION William Tramples a Cabbage 
•  1100–1153 ANARCHY Matilda Does an Impression of a Marshmallow 
•  1153–1189 BETRAYAL Henry II Fills a Castle With Prostitutes Then Falls out With God 
•  1189–1199 CRUSADE Richard the Lionheart Is Killed by a Frying Pan A Doctor Drinks a Patient’s Piss and Decides He’s Going to Die 
•  1199–1216 CHARTER John Loses the Crown Jewels in the Wash
•  1216–1272 REVOLT A Frenchman Calls the King ‘Simple’ A Pig and a Locust Get into Serious Trouble With the Law 
•  1272–1307 REPRESSION Edward I Tricks the Welsh 
•  1307–1327 BUGGERY Edward II’s Wife Sleeps With the Enemy A Man Carries a Pineapple Around Town 
•  1327–1422 CONQUEST English Peasants Kill Half of France in a Field Transvestite Playboy John Rykener Has Sex With a Lot of Priests A Floating Monarch Lies to an Angry Roof Tiler A Halfwit Commits a Hemp-Based Heist Adam ‘the Leper’ Has Leprosy Basically, Everyone Gets the Black Death and Dies 
•  1422–1487 FEUD Henry VI Becomes England’s Shittest King 
•  1487–1509 MURDER Margaret Beaufort Is ‘Single Mum of the Century’ 
•  1509–1547 SCHISM A Fat Man Fingers the King of France in a Field An Alchemist Attempts to Fly. He Doesn’t. 
•  1547–1603 PERSECUTION A Priest Eats an Apple Inside a Wall Francis Drake Shits Fire on the Spanish 1603–1688 WAR Charles II Escapes to France via an Oak Tree A Man Sets His Beard on Fire and Robs the Spanish 
•  1688–1727 REVOLUTION James II Runs Away from a Dutchman With Fabulous Hair A Woman Does Not Piss on the Great Fire of London Some Yorkshiremen Crash the Economy from a Pub 
•  1727–1760 EMPIRE A London Gentleman Orders a Latte and a Shag The Bloody Code Gets Rather Bloody An American Colonist Eats His Own Shoes 
•  1760–1837 INDUSTRY A Bloke from Bolton Reinvents the Wheel and Changes the World A Liverpudlian Dances in Front of a Train and Dies Lord Byron Fucks His Way Around Europe Then Dies Queen Victoria Doesn’t Eat a Curry 
•  1837–1914 LIBERTY A Victorian Man Sells His Wife for Some Gin People Get Excited About Toilets at the Great Exhibition The British Invade Ethiopia With a Train A Rake Dresses Like an Arab and Shags Everything A Scotsman Wears Tweed, Fights a Lion Then Gets Lost Shackleton Doesn’t Eat a Biscuit at the Bottom