That Was Awkward: The Art and Etiquette of the Awkward Hug

by Emily Flake

Overview

A Lit Hub “Most Anticipated Books of 2019”
A Read It Forward “Perfect Gifts for a White Elephant Exchange”

From New Yorker humorist Emily Flake, a hilarious, oddly enlightening book of illustrations, observations, and advice that embraces the inescapable awkwardness of two human beings attempting to make physical contact with each other. 

We've all been there.

You encounter the mother of your recent ex. That guy your best friend dated sophomore year. That friend-of-a-friend who you've met once but keeps popping up in your "People You May Know" feed.

Do you shake hands? Do you hug? Do you—horrors—kiss on the cheek? And then the inevitable: The awkward hug. That cultural blight we've all experienced.

Emily Flake—keen observer of human behavior and life's less-than-triumphant moments—codifies the most common awkward hugs that have plagued us all. Filled with laugh-out-loud anecdotes and illustrations, astute observations, and wise advice, That Was Awkward is a heartwarming reminder that we're all in this together, grasping hastily at each other in an attempt to say: let's embrace to remind ourselves of our essential and connecting humanity, but also, please don't touch me for more than three seconds.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781984879585
Publisher:	Penguin Publishing Group
Publication date:	10/15/2019
Pages:	128
Product dimensions:	4.90(w) x 7.40(h) x 0.60(d)

About the Author

Emily Flake's cartoons and humorous essays run regularly in The New Yorker, The Nib, and many other publications. Her weekly strip, Lulu Eightball, ran in alt-weeklies for many years. She's written and illustrated two books: These Things Ain't Gonna Smoke Themselves and Mama Tried. Her illustrations and cartoons appear in publications all over the world, including the New York Times, Newsweek, the Globe and Mail, The Onion, The New Statesman, and Forbes. She lives in Brooklyn, New York, with her husband, daughter, and a frail, elderly orange cat.

Read an Excerpt

Introduction

I’m a hugger. If allowed, I will hug you upon beingintroduced, upon parting, upon your having madea particularly good joke. Don’t get me wrong, I’ma believer in the power of a good handshake (firm butnot aggro, eye contact, no weird finger waggles), but thehug is my standard as far as physical punctuation goes.

I am also, however, an awkward person. The flipside of my comfort with physical contact is a fear ofletting people see just how much I want physical contact—I’m a half-trained golden retriever of a woman, barely holding my seat, wagging my tail, and whining a little in my throat, hoping you’ll pat my head so I can jump up and lick you all over your face. In my enthusiasm, I am more than likely to knock over your drink,trip over my own feet, or accidentally grope you. I am sorry, in advance.

Not so long ago, we had rules for this sort of thing. While your grandmother might not have been ableto quote Emily Post chapter-and-verse, she more thanl ikely had a sense of the broad strokes of social etiquette,or at the very least, a vague notion that such athing as good manners existed. Commonly acceptedrules for polite interaction were societal foundation garments, keeping everything in place so as to presenta smooth and jiggle-free façade.

But that was then, and this is now. We are a peoplewho will wear leggings as pants. Absent a social codeand the rituals designed to express it, we are left witha general idea of “be nice” with no particular acceptedmethod of being so. None of us quite knows what todo with our bodies. Jiggles abound. We find ourselveslost in a world full of physical indecision and potential gaffes. Do we shake hands? Do we hug? Do we—horrors—kiss on the cheek? Both cheeks? Will I bonk yourforehead with mine because I cannot remember whichside I’m supposed to kiss first? Hugs seem kind, theyseem friendly—the Mr. Rogers-in-his-home-in-a-cardigan-and-Keds of greetings—but absent widely understoodrules on how and where to deploy them, we’relikely to screw those up too.

Like you, I’ve been the giver and receiver of many awkward hugs. I’ve witnessed them from afar and up close. I’ve watched them take place between significant others, family members, and coworkers, each one awkward and uncommon in its own unique way. It is a universal experience, and if we can’t agree on a socialcode anymore, the least we can do is find some warm fellow-feelings in our collective confusion. I’ve bungled a number of hugs, and I bet you have too. I hope this book serves to let us laugh together at our foibles, and relax enough to remember that the whole point of socialniceties is nothing more than putting each other atease. Now c’mere, you.

Editorial Reviews

Looking for a laugh? Pick up That Was Awkward, a book of illustrations, observations, and advice by New Yorker cartoonist Emily Flake. Flake chronicles the hilarious awkwardness of two humans trying to connect.”
—E! Online

“Before the eggnog starts flowing this holiday season, arm yourself with Emily Flake’s That Was Awkward. It will make you laugh, cringe, and think twice before you do the handshake-or-hug hokey pokey.”
—BookPage

“The New Yorker’s Emily Flake takes a lighthearted deep-dive into the common horrors of embarrassing physical contact—including, of course, awkward hugs—what these interactions can signify, and what they feel like. (That is, very, very awkward.) It happens to everyone, Flake reminds us, and we might as well laugh about it.”
—Read It Forward

“It isn’t hard to recognize yourself—and everyone you know—in these hilarious portraits of awkward huggers. Sincerely funny, sly and subversive, Emily Flake perfectly captures the plight of our perpetually embarrassing rituals of connection.”
—Molly Ringwald

“Wise and wildly funny, That Was Awkward is Emily Flake at her best, deconstructing modern life with a needle-sharp wit but a warm heart. That Was Awkward is indispensable, brilliant, and delightful.”
—Susan Orlean, author of The Library Book

“Brilliant and weird! Yet again, the beloved Emily Flake has nailed it. As a hugger, (awkward most of the time), I feel understood AND simultaneously able to laugh at myself, thanks to this book. If looking for a guide on how to better navigate your way through this world of strange embraces, and also chortle whilst drinking coffee, take Flake’s book home with you pronto!”
—Mira Ptacin, author of Poor Your Soul and The In-Betweens

“Get it as a gift for whoever the last person is that you tried to air kiss, but then you misjudged which side to start on and you box your heads against each other. It’s great.”
—Dan Kois (on the Slate podcast Mom and Dad Are Fighting)
 

From the Publisher