We already are what we wish to become.
Join inspiring, life-transformational leader Melissa Joy on a journey to the heart of interactive reality creation, where self-love is the new normal.
Humanity is in a position that we have never been in previously, on new and unfamiliar terrain. You may be at a place in your own life where you are aware that "tried and true" behaviors and beliefs are no longer working. You may be unsure how to proceed.
Through a brilliant weave of unique language, testimonials, and practical play, The Art of Limitless Living provides multiple access points for creating new self-loving maps to navigate through changing landscapes.
In The Art of Limitless Living, you will learn:
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About the Author
Melissa Joy Jonsson is the founder of M-Joy, a unifying "we" movement that provides a new language to experience self-love as integrity. She is best known for her ability to engage people to embrace their true authentic power by playing in the field of the heart. Melissa has been teaching popular life-transformational seminars around the world since 2008. As an intuitive coach and holistic practitioner, Melissa has a diverse client base in more than 25 countries. Melissa spent more than a decade as an executive in the pharmaceutical industry. She is the author of Little Book of Big Potentials, Practical Play the Heart-Centered Way, and M-Joy Practically Speaking. Melissa has a bachelor's degree in psychology from the University of California at Santa Barbara. She resides in San Diego, California. To learn more, please visit www.MJoyHeartField.com.
Read an Excerpt
Moving Into the Gap
"We create our own reality."
This is a popular meme circulating through the collective consciousness that says we create our own reality. Pursuant to this notion is the idea that we are each responsible for everything that happens to us and around us.
Everything? Does this mean if a volcano erupts in Hawaii, we are personally responsible for the occurrence? Or if a relative commits suicide, or our child dies, that we somehow (consciously or unconsciously) created that choice as experience?
What if a war occurs among nations with opposing ideologies? Are we creating that reality from the remote privacy of our living rooms? What if, during an economic downturn, we are laid off from a company we loved, at which we had outstanding performance reviews consistently every year? Did we create that reality too?
The concept that "we create our own reality" seems a little oversimplified and, to a lesser degree, egocentric. Certainly we are not the center and instigator of all circumstances in our reality? Yet the notion that we create our own reality seems to imply that this is the case.
This is an easy idea to accept when things go our way. We are very receptive to being responsible for our successes. Some may consider abundance and accomplishments to be a function of luck, skill, or perhaps tenacity, but regardless of what we call our "Midas touch," we have no problem being responsible for making reality happen.
But what about when things do not go our way? What then?
Proponents of the Law of Attraction imply that we create our own reality by attracting what we focus on. This attraction is magnetized by our own resonant energy, sometimes called "frequency" or "vibration." Presumably, when what we focus on and expect from our minds (consciously) does not match our actual frequency or energy (often unconsciously), we wind up not getting what we expected. We are still creating our reality even if what we create ends up being what we think we do not want.
So if we are totally creating our reality, it seems we would be able to create a reality in which our unconscious energy or vibration does not cancel out what we focus on, intend, or desire.
Some might offer that reality doesn't always go our way and challenges occur because our souls agree to have certain experiences before we incarnate. Well, then, that would imply that we do not necessarily have free will, the freedom of choice. And if we are creating our own reality according to an agreed-upon preconceived soul blueprint, then through free will as choice, we would also be free to change that blueprint as creators of our reality.
Reality is not that simple.
We do not really create our own reality. Not entirely.
Consider that the idea that we create our own reality is perhaps not entirely true, or untrue, but is potentially useful, as the belief can help us to feel occasionally empowered.
However rigid an adherence to this notion we create, our own reality may result in feelings of failure and self-condemnation when things do not seem to go our way as intended.
Perhaps no matter how hard we may try; no matter how positive our thinking, how strong our beliefs, or how consistent our actions; regardless of how many times we may "get in the vortex" or follow the Law of Attraction, we encounter distractions and destructions that spin us in a direction bearing little resemblance to what we had envisioned for ourselves.
"What are we doing wrong?" we may ask. Do we need another book, seminar, or coaching session to tell us what we have yet to figure out? What is the secret, and why is the universe allegedly keeping it from us?
Indeed, maintaining awareness that we create our own reality does empower us to make changes in our lives. If our thoughts, beliefs, and choices are creating our circumstances, then conceivably we can change our thoughts, beliefs, and choices to create different circumstances and experiences. However, is reality really this simple? Or is there truly more to interactive reality creation than our own individual notions, emotions, energy, and actions?
Party of Experience
Perhaps it is not so much that we create our own reality as it is that we participate in creating and interacting with our individual and shared realities. We actively engage in the co-creative process consciously (and often unconsciously), and we have the power to choose how we react, respond, and relate to what seems to be happening as reality. We create our experience of reality.
When we change how we relate to our reality, through our inner actions and interactions, then we indeed change our personal and often shared perceived experiences. We may not change the immediate outward circumstances, but when we change how we relate to our circumstances, there is a ripple effect that influences everything.
Furthermore, consider that our experience of reality is more than the sole result of individual creative impulses; rather, reality is a function of a complex interplay of interconnected variables. Our individual choices, as well as the choices of others, are inexorably woven together in an interdependent synergy that creates a diverse tapestry of experiences. Our individual experiences are entangled with everyone else's individual experiences. Reality includes all these experiences.
Everything in reality is in relation to ... itself. Everything is also you in relation to ... everything. Your own experience of reality is based on where you resonate and how you connect with and relate to reality. Your projections, reflections, and connections continually serve as filters, mirrors, and windows into realms of individual and collective experiences.
What if we do create our own reality and there are also invariably circumstances that occur beyond our locus of control? How do we reconcile this perceived disparity into empowered forms of creating and relating to ourselves, others, and life in general? How do we change up external circumstances that seem to involve factors beyond our immediate grasp?
Language of the Heart
One of the most important tools for making distinctions and relating to our reality is language. Through the use of language, we categorize, identify, and name our experiences. Ultimately, we perceive the world according to our language. Our experience of reality is largely a function of the language we use to describe and reference reality.
As human beings, when we experience something new and unfamiliar, our minds will perform a few automatic activities. Our minds may ask, "What is this I am experiencing? How can I label and organize this unknown in my awareness?" To do this, our minds will compare and contrast the experience: "This is like something I already know, so this must be that," or "This is not like something I already know, so this isn't that." Or our minds will simply dismiss the experience from reality because the experience is beyond the mind's limited perceptual filters.
Words are carrier waves that connect us to both the seen and unseen aspects of our reality. We can't see love, but we have an innate feeling for what it is. We can also experience the effects of love in myriad ways. The word love enables us to connect to and relate to the experience of love even though the word love is not the experience. The word love represents the experience.
Through language, we relate to our reality. Yet language as a symbolic representation of reality can, by its very nature, fragment our consciousness and, consequently, fragment the experience of ourselves and our reality. Thus our experience of reality is often limited by virtue of the language we are using.
What if there was a language for organizing reality from which we could relate to reality and ourselves not from a framework of segregation and compartmentalization but from a framework of completion? What if this language could describe a terrain innate to everyone if only there were a way to map it? What if this new language enabled people to expand beyond their perceptual biases and programmed ways of navigating through the world, to experience the truth of their own unity and completion? What if this language could open anyone to the power and Joy of limitless living?
The Art of Limitless Living and the constructs utilized to organize reality occur via a new language for relating to all experiences of reality from the heart-mind of completion. This language also provides coordinates for creating new maps to navigate through current changing landscapes. These maps reflect on our inherent love and unbounded potential no matter what has happened, may be happening, or is yet to occur. This integrative language of heart-centered awareness coupled with the power of congruent choices creates indelible imprints, heart-prints that pave the way for the Integrity Effect to ripple into our personal and collective realities.
The Integrity Effect
How do we bridge the perceived gap between where we are in our current experiences and where we want to be as individuals, within our families, in our work dynamics, and among the collective global community?
The answers lie not in minding the gap such that the gap becomes bigger, because in many cases, what we focus on will grow, and we will end up getting more of what we do not want. Rather, answers rest in moving into the gap, integrating who we think we are with who we truly are. We move into the gap by embodying the integrity of our True Authentic Self. The answer rests in the Integrity Effect.
The Integrity Effect is noticed and experienced through the embodiment of heart-centered awareness. As a result of living from the heart in a space of coherency, making congruent choices that are aligned with the wisdom of the heart, we experience the beneficial ripple effect of symmetric physics expressing through proportional unity and completion. When we live from our hearts, connected to our True Authentic Self, there is no gap. There is only connection.
Moving Into Concrescence
The Integrity Effect fosters concrescence. Concrescence is defined as the growing together and merging of like or unlike separate parts or particles. When we embody heart-centered integrity as individuals, we experience concrescence as unity and connection within ourselves. Consequently, we are able to relate to others (and all of reality) through perceptual filters of unity rather than of separation and division.
The Integrity Effect at the level of the individual enables concrescence to begin to occur at the level of the collective consciousness. It begins with us. Heart-centered integrity begins with you and me in the WE experience.
Integrity is being undivided within oneself. Integrity is not some external standard that we must strive toward, like a moving target that perpetually evades our reach. Integrity is also not an earned award, nor is it a moral standard to follow, although integrity can foster morals. Integrity is not found outside ourselves; rather, integrity emanates from within our hearts and is reflected without via the unfolding of corresponding congruent circumstances.
Integrity is what permits our unique soul signature to emerge from heart to sole, as we step forth into the world one moment and movement at a time. Integrity requires consistent choices for sustainability.
Though integrity is a substance that cannot be seen or touched, like a chair can be, the essence of integrity emerges invisibly and undivided from the seat of our soul, creating an indelible imprint — a coherency that is reflected in all matters. We can choose integrity. Just choose.
Containers for Integrity
Words, deeds, and actions are all energetic containers for the essence of integrity to flow. Integrity is the skin of the soul, our largest organ and interface (inner-face), which breathes life into all endeavors.
When integrity is congested by confusion, deception, or manipulation, the flow of integrity is obstructed in all systems of inner actions and interactions. Integrity is not a barrier; rather, integrity is a carrier wave to bare what is raw and authentic in the heart-soul of our being. Integrity opens us to our truth, a song for the soul's transmission of love — love that transmutes and transforms everything.
Integrity cannot be compartmentalized, no matter how many mental lies are told. When integrity is compromised, the broken promise to self reverberates into the eternal soul.
Broken integrity creates wounds that lie before us. Initially the wounds may be only scratches or scuffs we may overlook, mask, or cover with a bandage. Left unattended without authentic awareness, the wounds will fester, bleed, and infect all organizations of the interconnected systems of reality.
What once was hidden by a bandage of protection may bondage the soul's True Authentic Expression. Life circumstances will present like salt thrown in the wound to beckon our attention. Through our hearts, we can air the wounds with the breath of honesty, inspired by integrity. This loving action will flow directly to the hemorrhage and heal the soul, restoring cohesiveness by providing wounds with the necessary ingredients to mend what once was severed.
We can allow the organ of integrity to orchestrate harmonic symphonies in all aspects of life with ease as grace. Love is integrity and can end all self-betrayal. Love as integrity is loyalty to the soul.
Integrity is deeply personal to everyone and yet transpersonal in that it affects everyone. Integrity may mean something different to everyone, depending upon personal thoughts and beliefs. It is not important that we be on the same page with respect to defining integrity. What is important is that you discover the essence of integrity that already exists within your heart.
Nonetheless, the integrity I am describing is an energetic integrity, centered in the heart, which radiates through congruent choices and actions, reflected in observable matters of everyday reality. Integrity includes a facet of transparency.
At the time this book is being written, there are no technological tools to measure energetic integrity. We can observe the effects of embodying integrity. We can also sense integrity like we may notice the presence of light in a dark room. We are attracted to the radiating essence of integrity as the light of life.
However, just because we can't measure energetic integrity doesn't mean it doesn't exist and it can't eventually be captured scientifically as an observable and measurable phenomenon.
As heart coherence can now be measured through electromagnetic tools, evidenced through HeartMath Institute research, I suspect the energetics of integrity will also someday be measurable too.
Just because energetic integrity may not yet be measurable does not mean it does not exist, for integrity as an essential quality is real, just like we know love is real. We know it when we feel it, and it is very real to us when we experience it.
Once upon a time, the collective consciousness did not believe in the existence of germs, because science could not see or measure germs. Then the microscope was invented. Now germ theory is a fundamental tenet of medicine. This theory states that microorganisms, which are too small to be seen without the aid of a microscope, can invade the body and cause certain diseases. Until the acceptance of germ theory, diseases were often perceived as punishment for a person's evil behavior.
What is invisible to the naked eye is not unreal. It is simply ... invisible to the naked eye. So, too, is the invisible essence of integrity that expresses through coherent wave-based interference patterns. Organized movement. Organized flow. Organized glow.
Some of us see these waveforms with expanded perception, and we know they are every bit as real as coffee tables. Others hold hands with skepticism and wait for the tools to prove the existence of unseen realities.
Wherever we are on the continuum of knowing or doubting, trust that someday soon what is hidden will be revealed. Perhaps we will be able to calibrate integrity in the same way we may sit down for a cup of tea — with ease and grace.
Our settings for reality will change. The settings are changing now. Feel it. Know it. Trust it. Our hearts can calibrate integrity. Our hearts have an innate sensor for heart-centered integrity.
Integrity Is Our Business
Not everyone will do as he or she says and honor integrity through words, deeds, and actions. It is not up to us to ensure that others have integrity. That is a path of control.
It is only up to us to honor our own integrity, for this is the path of the heart. When we do as we say, and honor our words through deeds and actions, integrity honors us with the rippling of our true authentic magnificence.
Consider that anything that lacks integrity is not sustainable. The physics of integrity is enduring. And although it is our inherent birthright to honor our own integrity, it is not our responsibility for others to step into integrity. That is not our business.
Excerpted from "The Art of Limitless Living"
Copyright © 2018 Melissa Joy Jonsson.
Excerpted by permission of Red Wheel/Weiser, LLC.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
Table of Contents
1 Moving Into the Gap 19
2 Everything Is You in Relation to… Placeholders 33
3 Mapping Unity 47
4 Becoming True Heartists In-Joy 57
5 Heart-Mind Synthesis 81
6 TAS, Emotions, and the WE Experience 99
7 Addictions as Distractions 123
8 Integrity, Relating, and the Ricochet Effect 139
9 Surrogate Power 157
10 Fluid Boundaries and Concrescence 173
Conclusion: Distinctions, Curiosity, and Living Into the Answer 191
About the Author 221