Read an Excerpt
Introduction
I was tired, stressed out, and I knew it was time for a break. My eyes kept closing, and the words I had studied and reread for my upcoming finals for what felt like the hundredth time were blurring together on the page and in my head.
Luckily, my university’s main library was steps away from a lake. Despite the chilly air, I decided to take the lake path instead of walking through campus in hopes of clearing my head.
I wasn’t expecting what happened next.
I stood frozen at the edge of the water, mesmerized by the sound. I was in awe of what I heard. Despite it being a sunny spring day in Madison, Wisconsin, some of the lake’s winter ice remained intact along the shoreline. The waves moved these ice chunks in a delicate dance, producing one of the most beautiful wind-chime-like sounds I’ve ever heard. I felt frozen in time, not wanting this miraculous moment to end. Kneeling down by the water’s edge to soak in the sound, I felt a sense of calm, peace, and connection. More than twenty years later, I can still picture where I was standing and hear the ice orchestra in my head. That moment made a lasting impression on me, and I found myself seeking and appreciating more of these magical micro moments, or glimmers, over the years.
As a busy mom of six, I admit that it can be challenging to step out of the daily grind and set aside the constant stream of distractions available at our fingertips long enough to notice tiny glimmers of joy. I promise, when you do stop and smell the roses, the changes in your life will be palpable.
Can one minute a day actually improve your well-being? The short answer is yes. Don’t underestimate the power of a small moment in time. If you allow yourself to experience the joy a glimmer brings for at least one minute each day of the year, you’ll have given your nervous system 365 opportunities to come back into regulation. Tiny sparks of joy that accumulate over time will positively affect your health and can permanently alter your nervous system.
A double rainbow in Paris. Stunning tulips at the Keukenhof gardens. The feeling of one of my babies burrowed into my shoulder. Reflections off Mirror Lake at Yellowstone National Park. Watching the sun dance like diamonds on the water. Sunsets that paint the sky in magnificent rainbow hues. Tight hugs that last an extra ten seconds. These are just a few of the glimmer moments that spark joy and safety and keep me searching for more ways to bring joy into my life.
Life can begin to feel like it’s slipping by. This is why grounding yourself in glimmer moments helps your life feel more satisfying, peaceful, and meaningful. Finding these small moments of joy really does feel like one of the best small ways to incrementally improve your health, increase connection to yourself and others, and spend more of your time grounded in the present moment. As we age, finding these small moments can have just as big an impact on our mental health as more monumental events of our youth, like extravagant trips, career achievements, or starting a family.
Gratitude and Glimmers
People get happiness wrong. We think it is about external circumstances (more money, a better job, etc.). But true happiness comes from our connection with others, our ability to be present in the moment, helping others, having a sense of purpose, practicing self-compassion and, of course, gratitude. It’s true that 50 percent of your baseline level of happiness is determined by your genetics, but research in positive psychology from Sonja Lyubomirsky, Kennon M. Sheldon, and David Schkade shows that you can raise that baseline by 5–15 percent by making small but consistent changes in just minutes a day.
By both incorporating a daily gratitude practice and being intentional about finding glimmers throughout your day, this dynamic duo can increase your overall happiness.
What Is Gratitude?
Gratitude is a feeling of thanks or appreciation for people, things, experiences, life circumstances, events, animals, or natural wonders that bring joy into your life. When you recognize others and express thanks, it helps you lift your mood and spirits by focusing on the positive aspects of your life. Counting your blessings is a way to improve your happiness, relationships, resilience, and health.
What Are Glimmers?
According to Deb Dana, in her book The Polyvagal Theory in Therapy, glimmers are the opposite of triggers and can help you regulate your nervous system and remain calm. Through repeated exposure to and awareness of glimmers, you can actually alter your nervous system and improve your health. Acknowledging glimmers teaches your body the important skill of holding dysregulation and regulation at the same time. A glimmer can be something as simple as noticing a heart-shaped rock, hearing your favorite song on the radio, noticing a butterfly while walking outside, or appreciating the smell of fresh-baked bread at the bakery.
How to Use This Journal
Each page features space to write five things you are grateful for and five glimmers you experienced during the day, plus a prompt to help you discover future glimmers. Studies show that repeated exposure to and awareness of both gratitude and glimmers can significantly alter your nervous system and improve your overall health. Creating this consistent habit will help improve your overall sense of enjoyment, fulfillment, and satisfaction.
The prompts at the bottom of each page are all intended to get you diving deeper into memories and emotions and experiences, and the things that do help increase our happiness. The goal is for you to experience a prompt and have it help you keep in mind what your future glimmers could be. For example, if a question asks you to recall a favorite memory, this will hopefully get you thinking about how you can experience that same joy in the future, but from a new experience. The more you can remind yourself to stay fully present through your interactions with others, your experiences, and your daily routine, the happier you’ll become over time. And your prompt for the day may be just what you need to shake things up and focus on the things that truly matter most.
