The Seven Core Issues Workbook for Parents of Traumatized Children and Teens: A Guide to Help You Explore Feelings and Overcome Emotional Challenges in Your Family

by Sharon Roszia, Allison Davis Maxon, Liza Stevens (Illustrator)

Overview

Based on a hugely successful US model, The Seven Core Issues Workbook is accessible and parent-friendly with brief explanations, activities and exercises.

The Seven Core Issues are Loss, Rejection, Shame/Guilt, Grief, Identity, Intimacy and Mastery/Control. The workbook gives parents the ability to explore their own issues as well as their child's through varies experiential exercise and activities. Parents can identify and address their core issues in order to more effectively assist and support the child's core issues.

The workbook and its exercises allow for a variety of diverse groups to use the book with ease, making it the essential tool for all individuals to grow and heal themselves and their families.

Product Details

ISBN-13:	9781787756694
Publisher:	Jessica Kingsley Publishers
Publication date:	08/18/2022
Pages:	256
Sales rank:	708,694
Product dimensions:	8.50(w) x 10.94(h) x 0.79(d)

About the Author

Sharon Kaplan Roszia, M.S., is an internationally known trainer and author who helped pave the way for open adoption practice. She has been devoted to her work in adoption and foster care since 1963 and is also a parent by birth, adoption, and foster care. She is the recipient of an 'Angel in Adoption' award from the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute and a 'Humanitarian Award' from the American Adoption Congress and is the co-author of Seven Core Issues in Adoption and Permanency: A Guide to Promoting Understanding and Healing in Adoption, Foster Care, Kinship Families and Third Party Reproduction.

Allison Davis Maxon, M.S., LMFT, is an expert in the fields of child welfare and children's mental health specializing in attachment, developmental trauma, and permanency/adoption. She is the executive director for the National Center on Adoption and Permanency and was the child welfare consultant on the Paramount Pictures movie 'Instant Family'. Allison was honored in 2017 with the Congressional Coalition on Adoption Institute 'Angels in Adoption' award and is the co-author of Seven Core Issues in Adoption and Permanency.

Table of Contents

Introduction 13

1 Loss 25

The Myths in Adoption, Foster Care and Kinship 26

Life Loss History Questionnaire 27

My Loss History Timeline 29

My Loss History Timeline Activity 30

Four Kinds of Losses 31

Core Losses Impact the Mind, Heart and Body 34

Core Losses and the Mind 35

Core Losses and the Heart 36

Core Losses and the Body 37

My Beliefs About Parenting 44

My Fantasy of Me as a Parent 45

Journey to Becoming a Family 46

My Sensory Profile 50

My Shadow Self 51

Managing My Emotional Triggers 53

The Power of Our Attention 54

Flowers vs. Weeds 56

My Child's Sensory Profile 57

My Child's Sensory Triggers 59

My Sensory Trigger Plan 61

Loss: My Key Points List 62

2 Rejection 63

Attachment and Relational Self-Survey 65

My Feeling Garden 67

My Attachment Questionnaire 68

Attachment: Purpose and How it Helps the Child 71

Patterns of Parent-Child Attachment 72

Attachment: Our Internal Working Model 73

My Internal Working Model 74

Attachment Disruptions and the Internal Working Model 75

Circles of Belonging 76

Rejection Hurts! 77

My Worry Bubble 79

Rejection and My Emotions 80

Rejection in Adoption and Permanency 81

Rejection Impacts the Mind, Heart and Body 82

Cycle of Rejection 83

Rejection: Words Matter! 84

Rejection and My Child 85

Adoption and Permanency Positive Language 86

Rejection: My Key Points List 87

3 Shame and Guilt 89

Shame Impacts the Mind, Heart and Body 91

De-Shaming My Mind 92

Shame in My Heart 93

Shame and My Body 94

Growing Up in My Family 95

The Two Ss 96

What Happens in Childhood Doesn't Stay in Childhood! 99

Facts About ACEs 101

Adverse Child Experiences 102

Finding Your ACE Score 103

My ACE Story 105

What to do With All That STRESS! 108

Good Stress vs Bad Stress 110

Self-Esteem Beliefs 111

Guilt and Shame in the Parenting Game 112

Four Ingredients of Self-Esteem 113

Connectiveness Questionnaire 114

Uniqueness Questionnaire 116

Power Questionnaire 118

Role Models Questionnaire 120

Liking Myself 122

Radical Self-Acceptance 124

Shame and Guilt: My Key Points List 125

4 Grief 127

Myths About Grief 129

My Grief Questionnaire 130

Grief in My Mind, Heart and Body 133

Grief and My Mind 134

Grief and My Heart 135

Grief and My Body 136

Grief Is Messy! 137

Grief and My Family 138

Grief in Adoption, Foster Care and Kinship 139

The Attachment Pyramid and Grief 141

The Gifts of a Secure Attachment 141

Childhood Trauma and Attachment Disruptions 142

Grief and the Story of Adoption 143

Parenting Triggers and Responses 144

Grief and the Spectrum of Human Intelligences 145

What is Emotional Intelligence? 146

My EQ 147

The Language of Emotion 148

If Feelings Could Talk 149

My Angry Volcano 150

Activities to Discharge Pain and Grief 151

Grief and My Child's Story of Adoption 152

Healing My Parenting Ouches 153

Forgiving Myself 154

Welcoming a Child into My Heart 156

Grief: My Key Points List 158

5 Identity 159

My Identity Questionnaire 161

The Self as a House! 164

My Parental Identity 166

Infertility and Identity 168

Identity: Pieces of the Puzzle 170

One Amazing Child! 172

Identity, Diversity and Adoption 173

How Diverse Is My World? 174

Identity and White Privilege Questionnaire 175

Building Racial and Ethnic Identity 178

Family Storytelling 179

A Parents' Guide to Difficult Conversations 180

Identity: My Key Points List 182

6 Intimacy 183

My Intimacy Questionnaire 185

The Different Kinds of Intimacy 188

Intimacy and My Mind, Heart and Body 189

Intimacy and My Mind 190

Intimacy and My Heart 191

Intimacy and My Body 192

My Communication Plan 193

What Am I REALLY Trying to Communicate? 194

Guidelines for Improving Communication 195

Where Did the Intimacy Go? 196

Single Parenting and Intimacy 199

Parenting and Communication 202

Parenting Chart to Strengthen Emotional Intimacy 204

Intimacy Opportunities and Barriers in the Constellation 206

Intimacy and Being Adopted 209

Exploring Parenting Curve Balls 211

Tips to talk about the tough stuff 214

Intimacy: My Key Points List 215

7 Mastery and Control 217

My Mastery and Control Questionnaire 219

Losses and Control 222

Weighing the Pros and Cons of Control 224

Why I Fight for CONTROL! 225

To Control or Not to Control! 226

My Thoughts and Feelings Log 227

Seven Core Issues Stuck in Control! 228

What's Your Zone? 233

Four Steps to Mastery 236

Mastery and the Seven Core Issues 238

Forgiveness and the Core Issues 242

The Gifts of Forgiveness 244

Mastery and Mindful Parenting 245

What Openness in Adoption Means 246

Ten Things Your Child Needs to Hear from YOU 249

Five Stages of Parenting 250

Your Gains from the Journey 252

Mastery and Control: My Key Points List 253

Congratulations to YOU! 254

About the Authors 255

Editorial Reviews

Highly recommended! This workbook provides a down-to-earth, practical and on-point learning instrument that illuminates the seven core issues. Filled with wisdom and designed to prompt self-exploration, the workbook will serve as a structured guide to awareness and healing. The material is presented in a way that is highly accessible for both parents and kids.

Betsie Norris

The authors have written a document that can help all parents as they seek to better parent their children, regardless of how each of those children joined their family. This content of the workbook will facilitate many avenues for parents and youth and older children to best use and understand the content - individual learning, informal group discussions and leader led instruction. Magnificent!

Irene Clements

This handbook gave me a much better understanding of what the seven core issues are, enabling me to manage these issues effectively.

Benny Saville

This thoughtful, experiential workbook is a must for every foster, kinship and adoptive parent. With a deep understanding of the core issues that you and your child face, the authors compassionately guide you on a personal and empowering journey to understand yourself as the way to understand, parent, and meet the needs of your child.
This is an incredible, user-friendly book that will help you deal with the "hard stuff" and come out a winner. It will open your eyes, touch you deeply, and change your life and the life of your child and family. So buckle-up, get a little vulnerable, and embrace this self-reflective journey.

Jill Stowell

This workbook is profound! I couldn't stop reading it and doing the exercises. Thank you, Sharon and Allison, for your amazing insight and understanding of the issues facing our parents. This is an invaluable resource for organizations helping to support kinship, foster and adoptive parents. If I could, I would gift this workbook to every single parent who is parenting a child with loss and trauma.

Mary M.McGowan