Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life: The Chump Lady's Survival Guide
Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life is a no-nonsense guide for anyone who has ever been cheated on and needs advice not based on saving their relationship after infidelity—but saving their sanity. 

In the infidelity literature, cheaters get all the glory—their unmet needs, commitment challenges, and love triangle drama. They are the glamorous taboo breakers, star-crossed lovers, and rebels against the hegemonic forces of monogamy. Chumps (the betrayed partners) by contrast are the dullards left out of the discourse. When mentioned, it’s to discuss how they failed to enchant and must “own their part” in their partner's infidelity. 

Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life puts the attention squarely on the cheated-upon. Written by a former chump, it’s a resource that champions self-respect. It doesn’t assume reconciliation or buy the victim-blaming narrative that we compel people to cheat on us by our inadequacies (or can win them back by being nicer). Instead, it puts responsibility for affairs squarely on cheaters and their crappy character. It also has a good time lampooning the absurd self-centeredness of cheating.

Based on the writings of Tracy Schorn's popular infidelity blog ChumpLady.com, Schorn offers a masterclass on how to decode manipulation, fight back, and focus on gaining a life after betrayal.
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Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life: The Chump Lady's Survival Guide
Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life is a no-nonsense guide for anyone who has ever been cheated on and needs advice not based on saving their relationship after infidelity—but saving their sanity. 

In the infidelity literature, cheaters get all the glory—their unmet needs, commitment challenges, and love triangle drama. They are the glamorous taboo breakers, star-crossed lovers, and rebels against the hegemonic forces of monogamy. Chumps (the betrayed partners) by contrast are the dullards left out of the discourse. When mentioned, it’s to discuss how they failed to enchant and must “own their part” in their partner's infidelity. 

Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life puts the attention squarely on the cheated-upon. Written by a former chump, it’s a resource that champions self-respect. It doesn’t assume reconciliation or buy the victim-blaming narrative that we compel people to cheat on us by our inadequacies (or can win them back by being nicer). Instead, it puts responsibility for affairs squarely on cheaters and their crappy character. It also has a good time lampooning the absurd self-centeredness of cheating.

Based on the writings of Tracy Schorn's popular infidelity blog ChumpLady.com, Schorn offers a masterclass on how to decode manipulation, fight back, and focus on gaining a life after betrayal.
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Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life: The Chump Lady's Survival Guide

Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life: The Chump Lady's Survival Guide

by Tracy Schorn
Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life: The Chump Lady's Survival Guide

Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life: The Chump Lady's Survival Guide

by Tracy Schorn

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Overview

Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life is a no-nonsense guide for anyone who has ever been cheated on and needs advice not based on saving their relationship after infidelity—but saving their sanity. 

In the infidelity literature, cheaters get all the glory—their unmet needs, commitment challenges, and love triangle drama. They are the glamorous taboo breakers, star-crossed lovers, and rebels against the hegemonic forces of monogamy. Chumps (the betrayed partners) by contrast are the dullards left out of the discourse. When mentioned, it’s to discuss how they failed to enchant and must “own their part” in their partner's infidelity. 

Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life puts the attention squarely on the cheated-upon. Written by a former chump, it’s a resource that champions self-respect. It doesn’t assume reconciliation or buy the victim-blaming narrative that we compel people to cheat on us by our inadequacies (or can win them back by being nicer). Instead, it puts responsibility for affairs squarely on cheaters and their crappy character. It also has a good time lampooning the absurd self-centeredness of cheating.

Based on the writings of Tracy Schorn's popular infidelity blog ChumpLady.com, Schorn offers a masterclass on how to decode manipulation, fight back, and focus on gaining a life after betrayal.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780762459056
Publisher: Running Press Book Publishers
Publication date: 05/10/2016
Sold by: Hachette Digital, Inc.
Format: eBook
Pages: 240
File size: 10 MB

About the Author

Tracy Schorn is a journalist who runs the popular advice site ChumpLady.com and whose snarky wisdom and cartoons have helped millions of people leave cheaters. Her book has been a #1 bestseller on Amazon in divorce and her work has been cited in The New York Times, the BBC, and other outlets. She’s also the cohost of the podcast Tell Me How You’re Mighty. She lives in Pennsylvania with her husband Paul, a civil rights lawyer. 

Table of Contents

Acknowledgments 7

Welcome to Chump Nation 9

1 Rejection is not Your Superpower 13

2 Rookie Mistakes of the Recently Chumped 24

3 A Shrinks, Forums, and Other Lifelines-How to Find Support 38

4 Cheaters-The Way they do the Things They Do 54

5 Stupid Shit Cheaters Say-and How to Respond 66

6 Reconciliation-Am I A Unicorn? 85

7 Real Remorse Versus Genuine Imitation Naugahyde Remorse 97

8 Chumps, Why Are You Stuck? 106

9 Common Chump Fears and How to Disarm Them 119

10 Obsessing About the Affair Partner? Don't 133

11 The Fine Art of No Contact 144

12 What Was Real? Does It Matter? 157

13 Getting to Meh 166

14 I Didn't Kill You, So Consider Yourself Forgiven 176

15 When Your Friends and Relations Just Want to be Switzerland 185

16 Divorce Shame and Telling People 198

17 The Unending Punishment of Breeding with a Fuckwit 208

18 Gaining a Life 226

Glossary 238

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