Communication Gaps and How to Close Them

This is the digital version of the printed book (Copyright © 2002).

 

The success of systems or software development depends on effective communication. But have you ever had trouble articulating a complex concept? Have you ever doubted that someone truly understood you–or that you completely received someone’s message?

 

Managers and technical professionals have to communicate effectively in order to understand client requirements, build work-related relationships, meet market demands, and survive time pressures. So often, though, communication breaks down, and nothing gets done (or done well, at least).

 

Thankfully, Naomi Karten–author of Managing Expectations–is here to help. Readers learn how to improve the way they handle a wide variety of communication conflicts, from one-on-one squabbles to interdepartmental chaos to misinterpretations between providers and customers.

 

Drawing on a variety of recognizable experiences and on useful models for understanding personalities, such as the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator and the teachings of family therapist Virginia Satir, Karten provides a series of powerful tools and concepts for resolving communication problems–as well as methods for preventing them in the first place.

 

Inadequate communications include misunderstood or missed messages, contradictory or mixed messages, and messages that are intentionally sabotaged. As the author notes, these miscommunications “can have a damaging, puzzling, and counterproductive impact on projects and relationships.” Karten helps readers identify many of the common factors that can cause communication gaps. For example, 

  • mistaken assumptions of understanding
  • lack of follow-up
  • unfixed project terminology
  • emotional baggage
  • personality conflicts
  • mismatched communication preferences 

Karten’s witty, conversational tone makes this book easy to read; her real-life stories and examples make it easy to understand; and her use of hilarious cartoons by Mark Tatro brings her lessons to life.

 

Communication Gaps and How to Close Them is a must-read for anyone who recognizes that the way he or she communicates in professional encounters, as well as in personal ones, can be improved. With Karten’s useful insights and practical techniques, this book will change not only how you communicate but also how you think about communication.

 

1005081711
Communication Gaps and How to Close Them

This is the digital version of the printed book (Copyright © 2002).

 

The success of systems or software development depends on effective communication. But have you ever had trouble articulating a complex concept? Have you ever doubted that someone truly understood you–or that you completely received someone’s message?

 

Managers and technical professionals have to communicate effectively in order to understand client requirements, build work-related relationships, meet market demands, and survive time pressures. So often, though, communication breaks down, and nothing gets done (or done well, at least).

 

Thankfully, Naomi Karten–author of Managing Expectations–is here to help. Readers learn how to improve the way they handle a wide variety of communication conflicts, from one-on-one squabbles to interdepartmental chaos to misinterpretations between providers and customers.

 

Drawing on a variety of recognizable experiences and on useful models for understanding personalities, such as the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator and the teachings of family therapist Virginia Satir, Karten provides a series of powerful tools and concepts for resolving communication problems–as well as methods for preventing them in the first place.

 

Inadequate communications include misunderstood or missed messages, contradictory or mixed messages, and messages that are intentionally sabotaged. As the author notes, these miscommunications “can have a damaging, puzzling, and counterproductive impact on projects and relationships.” Karten helps readers identify many of the common factors that can cause communication gaps. For example, 

  • mistaken assumptions of understanding
  • lack of follow-up
  • unfixed project terminology
  • emotional baggage
  • personality conflicts
  • mismatched communication preferences 

Karten’s witty, conversational tone makes this book easy to read; her real-life stories and examples make it easy to understand; and her use of hilarious cartoons by Mark Tatro brings her lessons to life.

 

Communication Gaps and How to Close Them is a must-read for anyone who recognizes that the way he or she communicates in professional encounters, as well as in personal ones, can be improved. With Karten’s useful insights and practical techniques, this book will change not only how you communicate but also how you think about communication.

 

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Communication Gaps and How to Close Them

Communication Gaps and How to Close Them

by Naomi Karten
Communication Gaps and How to Close Them

Communication Gaps and How to Close Them

by Naomi Karten

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Overview

This is the digital version of the printed book (Copyright © 2002).

 

The success of systems or software development depends on effective communication. But have you ever had trouble articulating a complex concept? Have you ever doubted that someone truly understood you–or that you completely received someone’s message?

 

Managers and technical professionals have to communicate effectively in order to understand client requirements, build work-related relationships, meet market demands, and survive time pressures. So often, though, communication breaks down, and nothing gets done (or done well, at least).

 

Thankfully, Naomi Karten–author of Managing Expectations–is here to help. Readers learn how to improve the way they handle a wide variety of communication conflicts, from one-on-one squabbles to interdepartmental chaos to misinterpretations between providers and customers.

 

Drawing on a variety of recognizable experiences and on useful models for understanding personalities, such as the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator and the teachings of family therapist Virginia Satir, Karten provides a series of powerful tools and concepts for resolving communication problems–as well as methods for preventing them in the first place.

 

Inadequate communications include misunderstood or missed messages, contradictory or mixed messages, and messages that are intentionally sabotaged. As the author notes, these miscommunications “can have a damaging, puzzling, and counterproductive impact on projects and relationships.” Karten helps readers identify many of the common factors that can cause communication gaps. For example, 

  • mistaken assumptions of understanding
  • lack of follow-up
  • unfixed project terminology
  • emotional baggage
  • personality conflicts
  • mismatched communication preferences 

Karten’s witty, conversational tone makes this book easy to read; her real-life stories and examples make it easy to understand; and her use of hilarious cartoons by Mark Tatro brings her lessons to life.

 

Communication Gaps and How to Close Them is a must-read for anyone who recognizes that the way he or she communicates in professional encounters, as well as in personal ones, can be improved. With Karten’s useful insights and practical techniques, this book will change not only how you communicate but also how you think about communication.

 


Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780133488708
Publisher: Pearson Education
Publication date: 07/15/2013
Series: Dorset House eBooks
Sold by: Barnes & Noble
Format: eBook
Pages: 376
File size: 2 MB
Age Range: 18 Years

About the Author

Naomi Karten is president of Karten Associates, based in Randolph, Massachusetts. Before forming her business in 1984, Naomi gained extensive experience in technical, customer support, and management positions. She has presented seminars and keynotes to more than 100,000 people internationally to help them deliver superior service, improve communication, strengthen teamwork, and build strong, trusting relationships. For eight years, she was also an instructor for the Weinberg and Weinberg workshop Problem Solving Leadership (PSL). Naomi is the author of several books and eBooks, including Managing Expectations and Presentation Skills for Technical Professionals. Readers have described her newsletter, Perceptions & Realities (posted at www.nkarten.com/newslet.html), as lively, informative, and a breath of fresh air.

Read an Excerpt

Communicating Change
by Naomi Karten

In times of uncertainty, such as those triggered by technological or organizational change, most people have an intense need to know what is happening and how it will affect them.  Yet, so often, communication in the form of information, empathy,  reassurance, and feedback is in short supply.

Not that no one's communicating.  Griping, for example, is common.  So are venting, grousing, and gossiping.  The rumor mill runs at full speed.  But most of the communication occurs among those affected by the change.  Those who initiated it, in contrast, are silent; or so it seems to those affected.  The result is a gap between those who introduce change and those who are on the receiving end.

As always, Scott Adams tells it like it is.  In The Dilbert Principle, he notes that people hate change.  The reason, he contends, is that change makes us stupider because our relative knowledge decreases every time something changes.  "And frankly, if we're talking about a percentage of the total knowledge in the universe, most of us aren't that many basis points superior to our furniture to begin with.  I hate to wake up in the morning only to find that the intellectual gap between me and my credenza has narrowed."[1] Point well taken.

Failure to Communicate

During a recent conference at which I gave a presentation on managing change, a member of my audience asked why senior managers are so poor at communicating during times of change. Why, she wanted to know, do they tell us so little, when almost anything would help‹even just acknowledging what a stressful time this is for us all?

Actually, it's not just senior managers but managers at all levels who communicate inadequately during times of change.  These managers include the many who introduce or implement change as well as those who oversee the people affected by it.  They may be project managers or team leaders or consultants.  Two factors stand out as responsible for creating this Great State of Noncommunication.  One is that, despite having experienced nearly non-stop change themselves, many managers nevertheless don't appreciate the jolting impact change can have on others and fail to recognize even the small steps they can take to help others adjust.

The second factor is that even when those in charge do understand the jarring impact of change, many prefer not to take any action.  They avoid communicating because doing so means dealing with those messy "people issues" (such as feelings, for example). As William Bridges notes in Managing Transitions,  "Managers are sometimes loathe to talk so openly, even arguing that it will 'stir up trouble' to acknowledge people's feelings."[2]  Of course, as Bridges emphasizes, it's not talking about these reactions that creates the problem.

In place of communication, management too often uses a "get" strategy: trying to get people to change.  As one vice president put it regarding the resistance of his company's sales force to use of a complex, new customer-relationship-management system, "Our biggest challenge was to get them to change their habits and use it for planning."

Alas, no one can get anyone else to do willingly something that person doesn't  want to do or doesn't know how to do.  No one can get others to adopt enthusiastically what they fear, resent, or distrust.  In a fantasy world, all those affected by a given change would welcome, endorse, and support it, openly and joyfully.  Rah, rah, the change is here! But in the real world, change is unsettling.  It always has been and it always will be.

The Get Strategy at Work

Inadequate communication was a key contributor to intense, negative employee reaction in two companies, the first of which faced technological change, and the second, organizational change.  The first company embarked on a large-scale, company-wide, desktop upgrade. The transition to the current platform a few years earlier had been easy for some employees, but a terrible trauma for others. Although the technology acted temperamentally at times, it was what everyone was accustomed to now.

Randy, the project manager of the upgrade-implementation team, repeatedly asked his CIO to set the stage for change by issuing a corporate-wide announcement.  Randy reasoned that employees would be more receptive to the upgrade if they knew why it was being undertaken, how they'd benefit from it, when it would take place, and what they could expect as it proceeded. However, the CIO did not provide information to employees. As a result, some employees didn't become aware of the upgrade until Randy's team contacted their department to explain and schedule it.   Most others learned about it through that most unreliable form of communication, the grapevine.

Employees reacted angrily when technical staff members arrived to tamper (their word) with their computers. Anger subsequently turned to outright hostility when employees experienced an unanticipated period of degraded system perfor-mance while implementation team members resolved bugs and fine-tuned the network. People fumed, "Why are you pushing this down our throats?"

Called in to meet  with several of these employees, I discovered that there had been so little communication that some employees didn't even realize that the upgrade was company-wide.  They believed it had been designed only for their particular department. The way they experienced it, the change was being done to them, not for them. They were victims of a get strategy.

In the company coping with organizational change, inadequate communication also contributed significantly to employee anger and distress.  Describing this experience, Dave, a director, bemoaned the dismal morale and escalating staff turnover that followed his company's merger with a corporate giant. Although a reorganization of his division was certain, and rumors were rampant, months had passed without the release of details by company executives.

Hoping to stop the exodus from his division, Dave urged senior management either to talk directly to employees about the upcoming reorganization or, at the least, to acknowledge their concerns and let them know when information would be forthcoming. Management ignored his recommendation.

Believing that employees would benefit from an understanding of the psychological nature of how people react to change, Dave tried another approach.  He offered to give a presentation to his division on the implications of change.  Management rejected his offer.

Dave was determined not to give up.  Trying one last approach, he inserted a succinct slide depicting the experience of change into another presentation he was preparing to give to his staff. When he previewed the presentation for senior managers, they directed him to remove the offending slide before giving the presentation to the troops.

Many months later , senior management rammed a comprehensive reorganization into place without informing, involving, or preparing employees.  Morale worsened.  The company, which was once a leader in its field, with a sterling reputation as "the place to work," now became a liability.  Turnover led to more turnover, and the company's severely damaged reputation made staff vacancies difficult to fill.

Why Change Packs a Wallop

In both Randy's and Dave's companies, management's view seemed to be, in effect, "If we don't tell them this is a big change, maybe they won't notice that their guts are knotting up in response."   Yet these are hardly isolated cases.  Perhaps management's hope, with each such wrenching change, is that this time will be different.  Maybe, this time, employees will go along meekly and passively, and won't make a fuss. Maybe, for once, management can just drop the changes into place and tiptoe away.  Maybe, people won't notice that no respect has been shown‹either for them or for the fact that big changes always create turmoil.

However, people always notice.

The reason people notice is that significant change is a felt experience.  How people respond to change is much more an emotional, gut-level experience than a logical, rational experience.  Change efforts trigger a panoply of reactions‹eagerness, enthusiasm, and excitement, as well as fear, trepidation, anxiety, uncertainty, anger, and stress‹feelings that are both positive and negative.

Change, after all, signifies an end to something.  As Bridges notes in Managing Transitions, "When endings take place, people get angry, sad, frightened, depressed, confused. These emotional states can be mistaken for bad morale, but they aren't. They are the signs of grieving. . . ."[3]

The importance of the grieving process is acknowledged rarely enough in personal circumstances, but it is given recognition even less frequently in the workplace.  Yet, grieving is a response not just to death, but also to other kinds of loss: the loss of a job, a role, a team, a location, a specialty, a valued skill, a way of doing work‹the loss, in other words, of a familiar way of life and its attendant safety, certainty, and predictability.  People grieve when they have lost something that matters to them.  Failure to acknowledge the need to come to terms with change doesn't eliminate that need; in fact, it places a greater burden on those who are trying to cope.

What is to be learned is that if you are in a position to introduce change or manage its impact, then what, when, and how you communicate during the course of that change can dramatically influence the success of the effort. Your challenge‹and this may signify a change for you‹is to communicate with the affected people in a way that acknowledges and respects their reactions, while helping them to accept the change and adjust to it as expeditiously as possible.

 

Table of Contents

CHAPTER 1: Mind the Gap 
* The Ability to Communicate
* Why Communication Gaps are Prevalent
* Closing the Gaps
* Key Recommendations
* Gaps Galore
Section 1: Gaps in Everyday Interactions 
INTRO
CHAPTER 2: Getting Through: Responsibilities of the Sender
* Unnoticed Messages
* Misstated Messages
* Missed Messages
* Cluttered Message
* Hidden Messages
* Off-putting Messages
* One-Sided Messages
* Unexplained Messages
* Conflicting Messages
* Befuddling Messages
* Informing and Involving
CHAPTER 3: Misinterpretations: How Messages Cause Confusion
* Two People Separated by a Common Language 
* Terminology Disconnects
* Everyday Terminology
* Clarify, Clarify, Clarify
CHAPTER 4: Untangling Tangled Interactions: Reaction of the Recipient
* Let Me Count the Ways
* Ingredients of an Interaction
* Intake: Candid Camera, with a Twist
* Interpretations: Multiple Modified Meanings
* Feelings: What Happens On the Inside
* How to Put the Model to Use
* A Few More Guidelines and a Caution 
Section 2: Gaps in Relationship Building 
INTRO
CHAPTER 5: Building a Strong Foundation 
* Working Together, Together
* Foundation Building Takes Time and Effort
* Build the Foundation While Building the House 
CHAPTER 6: Appreciating and Benefiting from Communication Differences 
* A Framework for Discussing Communication Preferences 
* Where You Get Your Energy: Extroversion (E) vs. Introversion (I)
* How You Take In Information: Sensing (S) vs. Intuition (N)
* How You Make Decisions: Thinking (T) vs. Feeling (F)
* How You Relate to the World: Judging (J) vs. Perceiving (P)
* It Takes All Kinds 
CHAPTER 7: Understanding the Other Party's Perspective     
* On Using a Perspectoscope
* Start by Scrapping Your Labels 
* Ponder Factors that Influence Other People's Behavior 
* Observe From Different Perspectives 
* Become Truly Empathetic
* Consider Their Case In Making Yours 
* Try Something Different 
CHAPTER 8: The Care and Feeding of Relationships
* Give Thanks 
* Conduct a Temperature Reading 
* Give Personalized Attention 
* Stay Connected 
* Create Communication Metrics
* Create Relationship-Tending Roles 
Section 3: Service Gaps
INTRO
CHAPTER 9: The Communication of Caring
* Contributors to Customer Satisfaction 
* Universal Grievances
* Claims of Caring 
CHAPTER 10: Gathering Customer Feedback
* Three Feedback-Gathering Flaws
* Asking the Right Questions and Asking the Questions Right
* When and How to Gather Feedback
* Act on the Feedback Gathered
* Perceptual Lags
CHAPTER 11: Service Level Agreement: A Powerful Communication Tool
* Why SLAs Fail‹and How to Ensure that Yours Will Succeed
* Adapting the Tool
Section 4: Change Gaps 
INTRO
CHAPTER 12: The Experience of Change
* Failure to Communicate
* The Stages of Response to Change
* Change Models
* The Satir Change Model
* Meta-Change
* Chaos as Status Quo 
CHAPTER 13: Changing How You Communicate During Change 
* Respect the Matter of Timing 
* Expect Individual Differences in Response to Change 
* Allow Time to Adjust 
* Treat the Old Status Quo with Respect 
* Allow People to Vent 
* Listen Proactively 
* Provide Information and More Information 
* Say Something Even When You Have Nothing To Say
* Empathize, Empathize, Empathize 
* Dare to Show People You Care 
* Involve People in Implementing the Change 
* Educate People about the Experience of Change 
* Deal With It! 
Bibliography 
Index
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