Surprising, funny, and reassuring information about the subtle and not-so-subtle experiences that comprise the Journey from regular periods, to anything but regular periods, to the end of periods. Period. WARNING: This book is intended for hormonally-challenged women only and may be offensive and/or downright appalling to younger or male audiences.
READ AT YOUR OWN RISK !
Could it be that the odd physical, mental, emotional, and sexual experiences you have recently noticed are related to menopause, even if you feel like you can't possibly be old enough yet? They could be if you are in perimenopause - the time of hormonal fluctuation leading up to menopause. To put it bluntly, you know you are perimenopausal when:
• The only other viable alternatives are that you are pregnant, crazy, going through puberty again, and/or have early dementia.
• You've had times when you can't figure out the right amount to tip, get lost in your own neighborhood, or feel like you are an impostor in your own life.
• You can honestly use the saying, "not by the hair of my chinny chin chin."
• The phrase, "I laughed so hard J almost wet my pants" turns into, "I laughed so hard I wet my pants" - and you didn't laugh all that hard.
• You talk about your hairy a++hole, and you're not referring to your husband.
• You've been looking for a good way to work not-so-feminine itching and the proliferation of pubic hair in non-pubic places into polite conversation.
• You have, at least once, gotten so hot that you seriously considered completely stripping off every single piece of your clothing in a public place.
• Or, you have 1/2 the energy, but need 2-times the exercise to stay in shape; want sex 1/2 as much, just when it takes your guy 2-times as long; and have 1/2 the periods, but they are 2-times as bothersome.
