Because I'd Hate to Just Disappear: My Cancer, My Self, Our Story

“Illness, in the larger sense of mortality,” Don Hardy writes, “is an inescapable shared trait among all living creatures, and we humans know about it, whether or not we want to talk about it.”

Because I’d Hate to Just Disappear is a portrait of a husband and wife, Don and Heather Hardy, thrown into the physical and emotional machinery of Don being diagnosed with leukemia and going through chemotherapy and treatment over a period of close to two years.

In this thoughtful and exquisite account, Don and Heather narrate Don’s struggle in real-time. Disarmingly honest, they recount each intimate stage of a couple living through cancer together, the mental and physical struggles, the humor and visceral emotion to reveal how two very different personalities shape—and are shaped by—the experience of cancer and its treatment. Through these moments emerge a constant flow of human kindness and discovery that lifts them each day.

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Because I'd Hate to Just Disappear: My Cancer, My Self, Our Story

“Illness, in the larger sense of mortality,” Don Hardy writes, “is an inescapable shared trait among all living creatures, and we humans know about it, whether or not we want to talk about it.”

Because I’d Hate to Just Disappear is a portrait of a husband and wife, Don and Heather Hardy, thrown into the physical and emotional machinery of Don being diagnosed with leukemia and going through chemotherapy and treatment over a period of close to two years.

In this thoughtful and exquisite account, Don and Heather narrate Don’s struggle in real-time. Disarmingly honest, they recount each intimate stage of a couple living through cancer together, the mental and physical struggles, the humor and visceral emotion to reveal how two very different personalities shape—and are shaped by—the experience of cancer and its treatment. Through these moments emerge a constant flow of human kindness and discovery that lifts them each day.

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Because I'd Hate to Just Disappear: My Cancer, My Self, Our Story

Because I'd Hate to Just Disappear: My Cancer, My Self, Our Story

Because I'd Hate to Just Disappear: My Cancer, My Self, Our Story

Because I'd Hate to Just Disappear: My Cancer, My Self, Our Story

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Overview

“Illness, in the larger sense of mortality,” Don Hardy writes, “is an inescapable shared trait among all living creatures, and we humans know about it, whether or not we want to talk about it.”

Because I’d Hate to Just Disappear is a portrait of a husband and wife, Don and Heather Hardy, thrown into the physical and emotional machinery of Don being diagnosed with leukemia and going through chemotherapy and treatment over a period of close to two years.

In this thoughtful and exquisite account, Don and Heather narrate Don’s struggle in real-time. Disarmingly honest, they recount each intimate stage of a couple living through cancer together, the mental and physical struggles, the humor and visceral emotion to reveal how two very different personalities shape—and are shaped by—the experience of cancer and its treatment. Through these moments emerge a constant flow of human kindness and discovery that lifts them each day.


Product Details

ISBN-13: 9781943859764
Publisher: University of Nevada Press
Publication date: 04/16/2018
Sold by: Barnes & Noble
Format: eBook
Pages: 280
File size: 1 MB

About the Author

Donald E. Hardy received a Ph.D. in linguistics from Rice University. He taught linguistics at University of North Texas, Northern Illinois University, Colorado State University, and University of Nevada, Reno, where he is now professor emeritus. In his retirement, he writes, reads, and gives mostly unsolicited advice to his younger friends.

 

Heather Kay Hardy received her Ph.D. in linguistics from UCLA. She taught linguistics at a number of universities, served as dean of the College of Liberal Arts at Colorado State University and University of Nevada, Reno where she also served as interim executive vice president and provost. She is happily retired and living in Reno with her husband, two cats, and dog.

Table of Contents

Contents

Preface

Not a Clue

No Matter What It Is

Don’t Clone This

Get the Fuck Out of My Way: I Have Cancer!

Biopsy Surgery: Is Anything About This Going to Be Funny?

Waking Up

How to Talk to People About Your Cancer

Keeping My Story Straight

I’d Rather Not Know Anyway

Quit That Looking at Me!

Where Did I Last See It?

The Evanescence of the Epidermis

Make a Wish

You’re the Expert: So Listen to Me Carefully

I’m Listening—for Now

Welcome to Chemo 101: Any Questions?

Nausea Treatment (to Be Used Only in the Event of an Emergency)

Through the Fog to Gratitude

How Are You? Great, Thanks, and You?

Back So Soon?

“Revelations” from the Infusion Room

My Real Selves

A New Year’s Barbeque

This Is Not What I Had Planned

Existential Dread?

TMI

My Afterlife

My Blind Spots

Letting Go

Fuck Cancer!

Watching but Not Waiting

On Not Being the Center of the Universe

Afterward

Research Interlude

Epilogue

Bibliography

Acknowledgments

About the Authors

What People are Saying About This

Joe Bonomo

“Brave, wise, surprisingly funny, this memoir, alive with intellectual and spiritual questing, is an inspiring response of a husband and wife to mortality.” 

Peter Richardson

“This is a witty, wise, and disarmingly honest account of coping with cancer, depression, and the mysteries of modern marriage. Imagine a friend telling you his most intimate life-and-death story while his wife corrects the record in real time. Along the way, you also learn about the perils of online self-diagnosis, the myriad ways our minds protect us from bad news, and nurse crushes. It doesn't get more human than this.” 

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