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Product Details
| ISBN-13: | 9781468551709 |
|---|---|
| Publisher: | AuthorHouse |
| Publication date: | 05/23/2012 |
| Sold by: | Barnes & Noble |
| Format: | eBook |
| Pages: | 112 |
| File size: | 130 KB |
Read an Excerpt
BONIFYED LOGIC
By Derrick Knox
AuthorHouse
Copyright © 2012 Derrick KnoxAll right reserved.
ISBN: 978-1-4685-5172-3
Chapter One
We as individuals form many types of relationships, and we have them in everyday life. We as humans, have to realize that even though we don't live in a perfect world, or have a perfect life that there is a perfect person for each individual. Knowing that with a relationship two things can happen, it gets better or it gets worse. This will ultimately rest on the two companions that are in a particular relationship. The type of relationship you desire is the type of person you should pursue. Only you know what pleases your heart, and stimulates your mind. There are some things that you are going to have to acknowledge if you want to have a meaningful relationship. This is going to be something you will always work at and you must be committed to making it work and having the integrity to stick by your word, companion, and beliefs. Wanting the same life goals, aspirations, and forming a union of two equal people, to truly benefit from it completely. Also it can feel like that the relationship you might not want can last a lifetime, the one you want doesn't last no time at all. Not only must the two form a bond with each other without that relationship with GOD the you will have no type of success or progress. This spiritual bond enhances all other bonds and gives the two directions so that they don't lean upon their own understanding when confused about their companion, or companions' motive. Setbacks and accomplishments even disappointments will arise in any relationship that you are trying to have. Perseverance through such obstacles will and can strengthen this bond depending on individual circumstances. Experiencing hardships and heartache with one another creates history. History with a companion develops over a period of time, and will not easily forget and may even be harder to let go of. For without history there would be no present and if not focused on the future then history will repeat itself.The motivation behind being in a relationship is to feel wanted and needed in some form or fashion depending on what type of relationship you seek. Finding someone that you can share your thoughts, life, heartfelte motion, or ambition and success with is no easy task. Finding love with an individual is one thing, but to share love with someone you can experience the joy with. True love with is undeniable. There are many things that you must take into consideration when trying to cultivate a relationship with someone you desire. You know what your heart desires so now you must find out if they want to be with you first off, once that has been established then comes trying to be with or just acquire something from you? What are we building together or will I continue to break? Also another question Are they pulling me up or pushing me down? These simple questions can determine how much of a friend they are, and if they with the team or against the team? This relates to being in a relationship as well.
FRIENDS
Most people say you should be friends first before jumping into any type of serious relationship which is true. To some degree, when you form a friendship; it's to get to know that person better. If a person chooses to start talking to someone and they have just meet then, this is where that process will begin and determine how successful the actual relationship will become. This is vital because you will learn more about this individual and know if this is something you will allow yourself to become part of or not. Having a true friend that will be there throughout the good and bad, and support you right or wrong is a rare commodity this day in age even among the generation gap that exist. When trying to have a relationship then the you have with friends seems to diminish and your significant companion may feel that they are no longer in need of a friend you have them to fall back on for support. Companions may have the urge to chase away all friends regard less of gender especially if they don't trust you or trust them as well. What some fail to realize is that being a friend can be just as beneficial the relationship you are trying to cultivate with them. Some individuals hear the word friend and may feel like the world is over, and all is lost. They even tend to ignore a person if they are not about what they thought they were about, pushing people away that want to draw closer to them. This is where the two of you can really make the relationship what you want it to be. Determine what type of friend is it that they are seeking and be the best friend that you can be if that's all that can happen between the companions. Knowing what you can do and won't be able to do, is also important because this is how you set the limitations on your friendship. Over stepping your boundaries can force a person too burn your bridge of friendship so to speak, and not allow crossing over that bridge ever. Friends are there for different reasons for different people. Some things you should just not do with friends unless it won't affect the friendship that is maybe at risk.
Even though you and your friend might have everything in the world in common, likes and dislikes, this merely means that the two of you are good friends and enjoy each other's company. And this will play a big factor in how close of friends you are going to become. Being a friend is more than just knowing someone who has your best interest in mind as you would have there's good friends show that they have each other's best interest at heart. It's easier to allow one's self to do more for a friend than a complete stranger. Wanting the respect the respect of your friends can the strengthens of admiration for one another, putting up with each other's flaws and appreciating them for who they are as individuals. Knowing how their attitude works when they have an attitude, and defusing the attitude without offending them or being disrespectful ... Even still friends of long can turn to friends of old. They in fact were strangers before you became friends. Dealing with friends is dealing with problems, not necessary all of their problems, but everyone has problems, if we didn't it would be too much like right. To have a friend you must be able to be a friend, and be a genuine friend. Sometimes you can be a friend and the person not realizes how much of a friend you are to them. They can take for granted the fact you have been to them what they are not use to, the fact that they have not experienced true friendship can have negative effects on the outlook of what they consider to be a friends based on the fact they have never had someone to honestly be a friend. This may mean proving your friendship time again and not knowing what to expect from them, you must realize that they may not be able to help the way they feel because of past experiences. As friends you go through a time period where things will be uncomfortable between the two of you and it may be something simple to solve but not easy to communicate with one another. Two things will happen, either drawing you closer or drive the two of you from each other. Understanding that it will always be a learning process constantly cultivating on the relationship, learning more and more about one another is very essential to how strong of a bond that will be formed among each other.
BEST FRIENDS
This stage of the being friends has more of an immediate effect on how close the two will become with one another. Conversation is enjoyable; doing things together becomes more of a routine. Time spent alone can result in really knowing everything there is to know about the individual without thinking twice about how you know. This person that you call your best friend you vibe with in all aspects of a relationship but they are already in a relationship or the two of you realize that it is best to just stay best friends for fear of ruining the friendship which much more important to the two of you. There may even be some sexual tension between the two this could lead to more serious things. When you claim a person or individual as your best friend, the level of comfort is raised and people tend to be more open and honest about how you feel and what you feel. Be careful with how your feelings in this stage of the relationship it can have a immediate impact and you may find yourself having serious feelings and even wanting them for yourself. The level of closeness is almost granted to be much to handle and can cause the two of you to fall out as friends, if you don't have the right perspective on the situation. If the circumstances are well within good intentions then you may have found the person that best suits you and your desires. When the feeling is not mutual then it can put a strain on the friendship. Once the bridge has been crossed be sure not to burn it as well. Coming back across the bridge will be difficult, if even possible to repair. Having a Best Friend is something you should cherish and not take for granted. Everyone needs a person to talk to in some point of their life. Expressing your feelings can be a positive way to release anger or sorrow. Holding in these types of feelings can be too much weight on the heart and you tend to push individuals away so that you can ease your worries within yourself. Your best friend may be able to shed some light on the situation where you couldn't see any at all. Best Friends also share each other's company in ways that some don't understand. It is a bond that cannot be broken regardless of how much time not spent or how long you go without any communication, or don't interact. You may not even realize how much you miss this person until time spent away from them, this friendship can also last a lifetime. The fact that they can't relate to the relationship is why they don't understand. The circumstance can be out into words, but an individual can relate better if they experienced it themselves. Te comfort level is so high or has no limits, that you can create whatever type of borders that the two of won't and will cross. These borders will be set in order for the two of you maintain that close friendship and not allow your feelings to cloud your decision making. With these borders set you know exactly what to expect in every situation that may arise. Knowing that this, individual will have your best interest at heart as they would have their own. Forming this bond of friendship comes from firsthand experience trusting this person, and having faith that they are truly genuine at heart. The conversation between best friends contains heartfelt joy and compassion for one another's well being at all times. You might not always be in a position to solve their problem but the fact you are around while its happening and you do what your circumstances allow. Friends understand you and how you are, how you deal with things, people, and life as it comes everyday. Even they have may some type of influence as to how we view our situation the final decision rest solely on one's self. Positive aspirations bring on positive reactions, so keep positive friends that seek similar things out of life. As you seek positive outcomes to your problems, then even if your actions are negative the solution will be positive. Friends are an expression respect amongst dear companions. They are bonded together by trials and tribulations that they experience tougher throughout life. Best friends even have time where they will not see eye to eye on a subject but that is what you must appreciate about your friends the differences that set you apart from one another. Knowing that they will be there for you even when you don't know how to be there for them and showing you will be there for them no matter how they might treat you as an individual person. Respect has to play some part in being best friends because if you do not respect your friend then there no telling how you will respond to certain things, view how they feel about certain things, or treat one another.
CASUAL SEX CONTRACT
This particular relationship is what some would call the most beneficial, in most cases. First off, you get all the benefits of a relationship, and no commitment to having one. There is no serious relationship, but you get all the sex you can ever want because this is want the relationship is based on from the start. There is no time frame on this relationship, it could last for a short time and in some cases it could last for years. This doesn't happen with ever situation but some have been known to last for quite some time. Even when a companion knows that this is the only relationship they will have with them, they may move on and cultivate another relationship with someone more compatible and not discontinue the existing relationship. Sex is never really a solid foundation to build a relationship on, but some find it hard to get good sex and when found not so easily let go of. So this relationship can tend to last longer than some marriages. When in a relationship you must satisfy your partner in every way and don't leave until you know they are completely satisfied and sleepy. Having a sexual connection or relationship with someone can be the simplest relationship, because that is all you have to do, pleasing one's companion. Some may even have more than one C.S.P. this is why there is so much dishonesty and deceitfulness among Men and Women in the dating community. Some are looking for that new thrill when they don't realize that nothing is wrong with the old one, just need to try something different to make it more of an enjoyable encounter. Being in tune with a person on a sexual level is also an aspect of a relationship, the more in tuned you are with your companion the better chance you have to satisfy and please them, the more you are sexually involved the more enjoyable it will become for the two companions. Not only must you be careful in this type of relationship, it can confuse you if not focused on just having a sexual relationship. The heart and mind may start to want the partner as much as the body has been or does.
Your heart can allow one to fall to deep into lust, and then you tend to look for more than just sex you look for more companionship than before when all their use to be is sex. Even with this type of relationship if the two partners are not on the same page or don't have the same perspective so to speak, then it can be just as healthy as it can be harmful. These situations will tend to differ from circumstance to circumstance depending on the individuals involved.
Some reasons the Relationship doesn't last:
- partners involved form personal feelings for one another
- rejection as a result form wanting something more
- sex is more than what use to and one partner becomes to possessive (does not want to stop)
- Depending on partner may desire something more and may desire to achieve it with someone else
Some reasons that it may work out for the best:
- Companions are happy with things have been progressing along
- wanting nothing to change about the situation (both companions)
- Dealing with the circumstances until something better comes along the way
- Sex could also play a factor
Some consider this an Ideal relationship or having your cake and eating it too. Having too much of a good thing tends to spoil us as humans then we began to become selfish towards others and not realize we can't always have our way. Sex is a bond that you will have to recall to memory or always remember. Being involved in more than one C.S.P. can be tasking on the mind because you must remember all that are associated want to be pleased and pleased well. Finding yourself with more than one tends to spread yourself thin and find it difficult to form any type of serious relationship with anyone you want or desire. Having this bond as sex partners can even strengthen the friendship, because of the trust the two companions have cultivated with one another. You may find yourself doing more things that you never thought that could happen or ever thought possible. Forming personal feelings for someone that you have been having a sexual relationship is natural because you are giving them a part of your love or essence and everyone is not worthy of your love and wanting them to have your love or essence only makes it more difficult to be closer than friends. If you seek to be more than friends this must be communicated and if not something that both partners want let go of. Casual Sex Partners only tend to focus on the sex part of the relationship if not already friends, having any other mentality and you will form feelings for this individual especially if the sex is correct and both partners are pleased. To some people giving up there body, is merely to get sexual gratification and pleasing themselves before their mutual partner. Maintaining the friendship is where the focus should be, because if you know your partner then pleasing them will or should come natural. To lose out on a potential close friend and sex partner would result in a missed opportunity.
(Continues...)
Excerpted from BONIFYED LOGIC by Derrick Knox Copyright © 2012 by Derrick Knox. Excerpted by permission of AuthorHouse. All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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