Read an Excerpt
CHAPTER 1
SETTING GOALS WITH A BUCKET LIST
BUCK· ET LIST NOUN, INFORMAL. 1. A LIST OF THINGS A PERSON WANTS TO ACHIEVE OR EXPERIENCE, AS BEFORE REACHING A CERTAIN AGE OR DYING: A BUCKET LIST FOR A TERMINALLY ILL PATIENT.
The very words "bucket list" can stir up some pretty heavy-duty fears. It can be a reminder of our own mortality, and death is typically something we would rather not think about. But, the reminder that our time is limited is actually one of the best gifts we can be given. It is one that can guide us to achieve what is most important to us before it is too late.
On average, we all will have 22,170 days in our adulthood to decide how to spend; maximizing each moment should be a priority because that time will go by all too quickly. Instead of wasting precious hours on meaningless and mundane activities (how many times have you checked Facebook today?), we should direct our energy toward goals that will inspire us to wake up motivated each morning and push us to each live our ideal life. In order to do that, we need to be acutely aware that we are not immortal, and then we need a plan. A bucket list can be the foundation for this plan.
Have you ever noticed that we will have detailed architectural plans when building a home and binders full of intentions when creating a destination wedding, but absolutely no strategy for the direction of our lives? You wouldn't expect to construct your fantasy house without having a system for how to lay the concrete foundation; the same is true for your life. A bucket list can be the framework for your life's design. It is not simply an idle collection of goals you want to achieve while you are alive; it can lay the groundwork for the future, while also allowing you to dream bigger and giving you immediate motivation.
You may be thinking, "I don't need a plan, things happen for a reason." Just as often as I hear the term bucket list, I catch people claiming that things happen for a reason. Hearing that is like the sound of nails on a chalkboard to me. This is because many people use this phrase when they want to believe that they didn't have a choice in the outcome of whatever has happened to them. It makes them feel better thinking they had no control over racking up thousands of dollars of credit card debt, or having no time for an overnight getaway — that takes the blame off them. Of course, life can be unpredictable, so you cannot possibly be in control 100 percent of the time; sometimes there's an unexpected crack in the foundation. But, your current lifestyle is a result of the decisions you have made in the past. Take a look at your life; what choices did you make to get where you are today? Do you have a shiny new car in the driveway, but claim to have no money for that trip to the South of France you have been dreaming of since childhood? Is your schedule filled with reading the tabloids and surfing the Internet, but you believe you have no time to take a day trip to the mountains to learn to snowboard? For the most part, your own choices create your current situation, and a bucket list will help you to look at your future in a way that can be the guide to help make decisions based on what you truly want. Without a plan, aspirations are nothing more than hollow ideas floating around in your head.
I had always been a fairly motivated person, consistently working on a few conventional goals: like finishing college, owning a business and my own home. But, it wasn't until I started my bucket list over ten years ago that my life completely changed. It forced me to reveal my deepest dreams, leaving the limitations behind. It was a place to put the fear aside and focus on the endless possibilities the world had to offer. It is the main reason that I chose to defy a conventional way of living, leaving behind the typical nine-to-five job. It is also why I have dared to eat worm patties on the streets of Vietnam, zip line through the Andes, fly through the air on a trapeze, and swim with whale sharks in Mexico. It was also the reason that I became a travel writer and started my travel blog, and why that blog now sees over a hundred thousand pairs of eyes each month. It got me in the mindset of truly believing that anything is possible, instead of just fantasizing about what I wished I could be and do. Without it, I undoubtedly would be a different version of myself today, one that conformed to societal expectations instead of designing my own life based on my undying passion for having new experiences.
BENEFITS OF A BUCKET LIST
We fuel our bodies with food, our minds with education, and our hearts with love, but new experiences and dreams can nourish our spirit in ways that nothing else can. Whatever you want, there are benefits to turning them into a bucket list, and a well-crafted one can push you to lead your version of an ideal life.
Forces You to Look at What You Really Want
Many people will live their entire lives without having any idea as to what they really want. They will follow society's conventional expectations of getting married, working the same office job for the next twenty years, buying a home, and having children — all without giving it a second thought because that is just what they are "supposed to do." But, if that path is not their true passion, then life will end up leading them, instead of them leading their life.
The process of writing a bucket list forces you to take a close look at what it is you truly desire, to analyze where you are versus where you want to be. It very well may be the career, children, and home, etc., but it may also be something entirely different. We may believe that what we want is to have more money or to land that big promotion at work, but delving deeper reveals that what we really crave is more freedom and to be passionate about what we do. Will that new position at work really help you achieve your future goals or will it only stifle your creativity and keep you at work more hours of the day?
When sitting down to contemplate what your future will look like, your dreams and what type of experiences you want to have will be brought to the forefront. By asking yourself what you truly want, setting goals and consistently reexamining your goals, you gain a self-knowledge that will propel you in the right direction instead of focusing on random things.
Gets you Excited
Many people's sleepless nights are due to having a mind filled with countless tasks for the next day: Johnny has to be driven to soccer practice after school, the prescription needs to be picked up at the pharmacy, work documents must be priority mailed ... and the list goes on. These duties can also be the reason you walk around the entire day in a fog, oblivious to how you got from one place to the next, instinctively going through the monotonous routines of life. But, what if what kept you up at night were thoughts of planning your dream vacation to watch the sunset at Uluwatu Temple in Bali or going back to school to study French viticulture, to do the things you are truly passionate about? Then sleepless nights would be because of excitement, a reason to get up early in the morning, and stay up late at night.
When you are stuck in the rut of day-to-day life, it can be difficult to get excited about the day that lies ahead. A bucket list gives you a reason to spend that extra hour a day working, adding meaning to the extra effort, because the additional money will be why your dream of ice climbing in Iceland will come true. It can create an excitement deep in your soul and expose the passion you thought you had lost many years ago.
Creates Focus
A bucket list will give you a sense of direction that allows your mind to focus on the target, instead of getting sidetracked dawdling on social media or watching reruns of the Kardashians (I am admittedly guilty of that sometimes too!). It will help you determine your end goal and the steps that need to be taken to get there, keeping your eye on the prize. For example, without a clear career focus, you may just take every promotion opportunity given, switching departments and ending up as the executive production manager, when what you really wanted was to be a marketing director. Without clear goals it's easy to get diverted, heading in multiple directions, and years later ending up in a place you really never intended. Even with goals, if you cannot remain focused you will lose momentum, which will lead to a loss of motivation and ultimately failure to achieve the result you desire. But once you create your bucket list, you will be able to continuously refer to it in order to reenergize your focus.
Motivates You
Without motivation, your dream will be nothing more than that; it is the necessary energy that pushes you to accomplish your goals. If you think about it, most drive you have had in your entire life has been based on some form of a goal. You worked a part-time job in high school in order to afford a shiny new car, you suffered through endless piano lessons to be able to play at the year-end recital, and you ate salad for dinner every night in order to fit into a bathing suit by summer. Motivation is why race car drivers win trophies and business owners become millionaires, and it is the main reason that this is a published book, a project that took me over a year and a thousand hours.
In order to truly get motivated, you need to know what you really want, and writing a bucket list will help to determine exactly what that is. These goals will then be the root of your motivation. Also, having any sort of list naturally inspires you to want to cross things off of it, whether it is simply your weekly grocery list, daily to-dos, or a bucket list. Plus, having it written down will be a constant reminder of what you need to do, and will serve as the fuel that will drive you forward. This does not mean it will be easy, but once you set your list to paper and have announced it to the world, you have something to encourage you to push forward.
Pushes the Boundaries of Your Comfort Zone
It has been said that life begins at the end of your comfort zone, so then why are so many afraid of stepping outside of it? I will tell you why. Being inside your comfort zone minimizes stress and risk, keeping you at a low anxiety level. This makes it very easy to never push the boundaries, because it's pretty darn comfy inside the safety of your little bubble. Everyday activities like taking a shower, cooking dinner, and going to work don't create any apprehension because they are familiar. However, flying across the globe, eating strange foreign foods, and not speaking the language of an area will undoubtedly cause trepidation.
Unfortunately, if you stay inside of these boundaries you'll be missing out on the incredible benefits of taking a risk. Risk-taking leads to personal growth; expanding your mindset, teaching you valuable lessons, increasing your confidence, and limiting regrets. Your bucket list will continuously test these barriers, helping you to transform and grow. Once you step out of the norm for the first time, it can lead to a snowball effect, where each consecutive time you do it, it gets a little bit easier and your comfort zone expands bigger and bigger. That's when the world is truly at your feet.
Makes You Feel Accomplished
There is a new gallon of milk in the fridge, the children have taken their baths, and dinner is on the table. You sit back with a glass of Cabernet and relish in the success of the last eight hours. It feels really good to finish your daily errands; there is a sense of satisfaction knowing that you completed everything you set out to do for the day. Just imagine the triumphant feeling after you've walked the five-hundred-mile El Camino de Santiago or skydived over Palm Jumeirah in Dubai. The sense of accomplishment can truly be overwhelming.
Accomplishment gives you a feeling of pride, which in turn builds self-esteem and increases life satisfaction and fulfillment. When you are living the bucket list life, you will be continuously making check marks next to your goals, and getting the addictive feeling of success often. It doesn't even have to be a gigantic long-term goal to generate the feeling of achievement; it can be as simple as learning how to make an origami crane or learning to ice skate. Plus, one of the best parts is that you are not waiting for someone to pat you on the back to tell you did a good job — it is a feeling you created yourself.
Makes You More Interesting
My high school political science teacher once told me that the only thing I would be able to talk to my husband about at the breakfast table was going to be bacon and eggs. The class definitely wasn't my favorite, but her words have resonated with me ever since. It was humiliating at the time, making me feel dumb and insignificant, but I now understand that it was her intention to make me realize that people would find me a bore if there was never anything interesting coming out of my mouth. I would love to talk to her now about the dozen different types of bacon found throughout the villages in Italy and the secret recipe of the traditional egg coffee drink in Vietnam.
Think back to some of the most intriguing people you have met at a dinner party or event. They were probably ones who were following their passions, traveling the world, and/or overcoming an obstacle to achieve a goal. With a bucket list you will have personal stories from around the world and extraordinary things you have done to contribute to the conversation. Plus, for me it's much easier to join into a conversation because when a person begins to talk about going wine tasting in Tuscany I have either done the same or have a relatable experience.
Keeps You Active
Sitting home night after night on the couch leads to a sedentary (and very boring) life. Things like riding a mechanical bull, swimming with dolphins, or learning how to indoor rock climb gets you off the sofa and keeps you moving. Besides a few random Pilates classes, my bucket list is my main form of exercise, because there is always something adventurous on it. Some days will involve training for a 5k race, while others will take me to the golf course attempting to make an elusive hole in one. When the goal is centered on traveling, traipsing through airport terminals, and exploring city centers by foot, you could easily rack up the ten thousand steps a day that many of us try to achieve (my record was twenty-nine thousand or 14.5 miles while hunting for the Khamthiang Market in Chiang Mai). The best part is that when you are excited about trying something new or achieving a goal, you'll barely realize that you are getting a workout at the same time.
Creates a Legacy
What stories do you want to tell to your great-grandchildren? How would you like to be remembered? What example do you want to set for future generations — one of a life full of passion, following dreams, and having meaningful adventure or one of unhappiness? We all want our lives to matter, to serve as an example for what a truly incredible life can be. A bucket list can help you to be that example.
When you are following your passions and accomplishing goals you will leave an inspiring legacy of your personal values for future generations. Family, friends, and even strangers will remember the best parts of you and be inspired to follow in your footsteps. Make sure the path is taking them in the direction you would want your loved ones to go.
Allows You to Dream Bigger
Typically, when people create goals for themselves they are influenced by their current financial situation and personal time restrictions. They are usually thinking about things short term, instead of thinking of their entire lifetime. But, a bucket list is an invitation to dream bigger. When the time limit is before you die, instead of this month or year, it opens up the possibilities. It encourages people to put on it all the things they have ever thought about doing while taking away the limitation of fear, time, and money.
So make a bucket list and fill it with dreams that have no boundaries; things that scare the daylights out of you, make you pee-your-pants laugh, and inspire you to be a better version of yourself. Keep it close, to refer to it often as a reminder to never forget your dreams.
(Continues…)
Excerpted from "Bucket List Adventures"
by .
Copyright © 2017 Annette White.
Excerpted by permission of Skyhorse Publishing.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
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