How to Live Forever

by Barry Burnett

Overview

Meet David Black, a young family doc whose solo practice has spectacularly tanked. So has his marriage; the two are not unrelated. His best friend, Oz, wants him to reinvent himself, offering their fellow Boulderites everything they need to live forever (or at least long enough for Oz to profit and retire).

David balks.

At first.

What follows is a romp of a read, a comedy with heart — from the characters who staff the new clinic to pursuit by pheromone-crazed wildlife, a real live cliff-hanger, and the love that, in the end, might just save him.

Visit the exotic New-Age mecca of Boulder, Colorado, and get to know
David, hapless idealist and reluctant hero,
Junie Blanche, Ph.D. candidate and New Orleans immigrant,
Oz Garcia, entrepreneur and Master of Bad Habits,
Shriana, organic beauty and trophy wife aspirant,
Don Gilmore, hypochondriac and hemp magnate,
Cyrus P. Flint, slowly expiring longevity scientist,
Miss Paula and Dr. Biggs, fearsomely muscular HGH hawkers,
Beatriz Hanacanahuolipalipalulu, Kava Kava smuggler...

...and, of course, the happy but complicated staff of the Forever Clinic:
Dr. Quinn Quinn, former health guru and cross-dressing fugitive,
Nancy Ouvenstrasser, lonely masseuse and closet intellectual,
Adeline and Thomas Thinna, starving diet & fitness pros,
and Howie Krishna, Yogitation instructor and actual Real Thing.

(Warning: while many local statutes prohibit the sale of How To Live Forever as a wellness and longevity guide, there remains a modest danger that the reader might inadvertently absorb one if not more aspects of its radically 'Reasonable Approach to Semi-Optimal Health'.)

Product Details

BN ID:	2940012831613
Publisher:	The Fool Press
Publication date:	06/30/2011
Series:	(A very Fictional Guide)
Sold by:	Barnes & Noble
Format:	eBook
File size:	1 MB

About the Author

My story started in Detroit. After an early exit from high school, I was a bronze foundry worker by day and art student by night, then moved on to a GED, Wayne State University, and med school. This was followed by a residency in Colorado, an alternative practice in Boulder, and a fellowship at UCLA Public Health. My partner lured me to her beloved NYC, where we had the second of three great kids, I taught for a few years, and was certified in Preventive Medicine before dragging her back to this near-fictional isle in the great literal West.

Currently, I hold a half-time position as a family doc, making it the world's best day job, a solid dose of life and patient care that still leaves time to write (and, yes, a few healthy-lifestyle things that are fun enough to do but boring to read about — except, perhaps, in the context of a lively, character-filled story).

Aside from a few published studies, I began my writing career with the Zen of Science column for Nexus, covering topics from sex to homeopathy, yoga, massage, meditation, acupuncture, social connectedness, and the psychology of cancer survival. A decade ago, I fell into fiction and have been addicted since. This led to the novels Resonance, Thrilling Romance, The Mortalist, a handful of short stories, and now, How To Live Forever. The last has been the best: the characters became friends, if rather odd ones, and I’ve been fascinated by aging and longevity since, well, forever.

Please see howtoliveforever.com for easy links to short stories (gratis), the new eNovel above (currently gratis), and the previous book as a trade paperback (unfortunately non-gratis). Thanks for reading!

Editorial Reviews

I really liked this book. Not often that thought-provoking insight is combined with humor and action. The story was surprisingly engaging, the characters interesting, and the setting great. Boulder is a terrific city, but is not without it's quirks, many of which are frequently pointed out.

I was also surprised at the amount of useful and accurate medical information skillfully woven into the plot. Really cool bonus.

If you like to think, laugh and learn, you'll love it!

J.B. MacIntyre

This story was a real surprise. Although much of the humor was keyed off local (Boulder Colorado) idiosyncrasies, the author took care to make it accessible to readers not familiar with the area. There was enough suspense in this satire to keep me in my chair for the whole read. Though often playful, it was edgy and sometimes serious concerning the subject of our desire for impervious health. As a previous reviewer noted, there is much good sound medical advice woven throughout the story. In add

Steve Kasle

Not the genre that would normally attract me, but I'm pleased I chose this book. Several chuckles & a few belly laughs in, I think it's a quite clever satire on our times & culture. It even explores in its own way some quite telling issues related to our attitudes to social mores, & I found myself gently addressing some of my own prejudices & outlooks even as I laughed along with it.Intelligently written pulp fiction....a good read.

Anonymous Midlander

A comedy with... a dash of romance, a definite bad guy and a thriller-like chase, a moral conundrum, and the most perfect ending. In sum, it defies categories and would make traditional publishers nervous. Especially since it includes subtle reminders about how to take care of ourselves.”

Boxing the Octopus - Caitlin Hamilton

...While I’m sure I soaked up some advice, it was woven into a comic adventure that’s got to be nine-tenths of the book. Picture an idealistic young doctor, down on his luck, who gets talked into running a very-much-for-profit longevity center, the Forever Clinic. As another reviewer noted, everything that can go wrong, does. Health, sex, mayhem, and True Love—in Boulder, Colorado

GoogleBooks - Kath Biesadecki