If you are an average American, you have been giving your power away without even knowing it. We have been taught that it is not good to seek power or to be powerful. Thoughts of greed, money, manipulation, controlling of others or even military force comes to mind. We have been taught this lie and thus we have become disempowered without even realizing it. The result of this manipulation can show up in our lives as depression, illness, stress, anxiety, or a general loss of happiness.
What is true power and why is it important to us as individuals? Simply, “your power is measured by your ability to create the things that you want to see in your life.” Anything that disrupts this natural ability, we call disempowering. Anything that enhances this natural ability, we call that empowering. People are unknowingly giving away their power by the things that they watch, listen to, think, say and do daily. By retaining your innate power, you will improve all the areas of your life, including your health, your relationships and your career or business. The author presents and explains master principles on how to raise the quality of your mental, emotional and physical energy.
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The Law of Attraction is not enough
The law of attraction has been popularized in recent years. By now most people have heard about what it is and many understand how it operates. Books like "The Secret" explain what this law states. In the past, this law was referred to as prayer or even magic. Here is a very short explanation of how the law of attraction affects us humans. Simply, when we are focusing on things that make us feel good, we then attract more situations and circumstances that make us feel good. When we are focusing on things that make us feel bad, we then attract more situations and circumstances that make us feel bad. So then, our work becomes about where we place our focus. Our work becomes not placing our focus on the things that make us feel bad (or disempowered) but placing our focus on being, doing and having more of the things that make us feel good (or powerful) as I like to call it. Most people are unaware of the things they do that make them feel bad or disempowered which is why books like "The Secret" or "Think And Grow Rich" have not solved all their problems. The material in this book will point out the common ways that people dis-empower themselves without even knowing they are doing so. This material also points out the ways to cultivate your power, to be more powerful so that we engage the law of attraction properly. When we are being powerful, only then are we able to create and attract more of what we want in every area of our life. That is our work, to remain powerful. That is what this book is about and that's what we will be studying. It is possible that you may come upon a concept here in the book and think, wow, this is so basic or hey, I've heard this before. You may think, "I already know this." Remember what Leo Buscaglia said. "To know and not to do is really not to know." In other words, just because you heard or read something before, doesn't mean you are living it or being it. Sometimes we have heard something without understanding the "full" meaning behind the concept. You know something when you have experienced it. You know something when you are living it, it is a part of your being and you have the results to prove it. Simply, to know something means you can't un-know it.
Here is a concept to get us rolling. What came first, the money or the power?
Think of two men, John D. Rockefeller and Andrew Carnegie. Both men developed so much wealth in the United States, that they were hundreds of times wealthier than anyone we have here today. They both started with nothing and they ended up giving away more money than today's Billionaires even have control of. These two men used their power to create whole industries that did not exist before. Their power did not come from the money. All powerful people, be it people with incredible health, wealth or relationships have one thing in common. They have empowered thinking. They have focused thinking towards what they want and feel good or excited about the pursuit of the thing. A person who has scattered thoughts all day or people who are multi-tasking are not generating enough focused energy to create anything in particular. Again, society is setup in a way that can keep the average person from being able to focus on any one thing for too long. Society talks about living a balanced life as being the correct way to live. Well balanced life and focus are a bit of a contradiction. Focus is where your power comes from. If we put a certain amount of energy into a light bulb, you will see the dispersed light go out in all directions lighting up part of a room. If you put that same amount of energy through a laser light, you will see a focused powerful beam of light that can burn through walls and be seen from the moon or beyond. We are going to talk about the ways to leave behind the disempowering patterns and learn how to concentrate mental and emotional energy into power. We will talk about how to direct that power at whatever you want to create or change in your life. These are secrets to being powerful in your life here on earth. These are secrets to feeling good more of the time and creating more of what you want, whatever that is. A mentor of mine said this, he said, "there is no magic, but yet, its all magic." I think what he meant was that some of these concepts may not appear to be secrets or "magic" and many of them have been in plain view. The real secret is that you need to know them and they are all magic once you "know" them. I believe that we humans are not just creative, but we are creators. We humans have been given the ability to create anything that our minds can conceive. Just as knowledge is only power if we use it, power is only power if we use it as well. I have a 575-horsepower car sitting outside. It has amazing power when I drive it. If, however, I just let it sit there and look at it, it may as well be a rock. It is only powerful if I tune it and unleash it. So, throughout this book were going to be discussing how to be and stay powerful as well as how to unleash that power.
People seeking power have been given a bad name. That is because we have been taught that power and wanting power is a bad thing. That is a misnomer and a lie. We have been taught wrongly about what power actually is.
First, let's better define what we mean when we say "Power." The word "Empowerment" gets thrown around a lot these days so let's be clear on this. Power is not physical force. Force is not power. We are not talking about bashing through anyone or anything that gets in the way of us achieving something. We are not talking about domineering anyone or controlling anything outside of us, that is not Power. We are talking about being dominant and at cause over our lives. The "only" reason anyone is not getting what they want in life is because they are (unknowingly in most cases), giving away their power.
What is my definition of Power?
My definition of power is simply this: Your power is measured by your ability to focus your mental and emotional energy on a subject until you bring it to be. An even shorter definition is "your ability to create what you want to have in your life." Some call this manifestation. Your power is in your ability to decide what you really want, to shut out all distractions, and cut through your fears. Your power is in your ability to "act" when inspired to do so. Your power comes in your ability to find the gold or the opportunity in everything that surrounds you. Your power comes from you accepting and keeping 100% responsibility for absolutely everything that occurs in your life. Your power is measured by your "Response-Ability" or your "Ability to Respond," not re-act, to everything in your life. Your power to move your life forward comes from your willingness to change anything and everything in your life, should it no longer serve you. Some call this raising consciousness or vibration. Your power comes from seeking your truth and knowing that you can create what you want from wherever you are. When we are being powerful, it is then that we feel good. Feeling good needs to be our objective every day. For only when we feel good, can we then create or change what we want in our lives. Feeling good is what we all want, but sometimes we forget this simple truth, and get caught up in daily activity.
For these reasons, we need to be aware of the things that can unknowingly dissipate our power. We also need to understand the things that can help us generate more power on a daily basis. In this book, we will identify the things to stop doing which are dissipating your power or allowing you to give your power away each day. We will also be talking about the things to do that will enhance your ability to generate more power and focus your power. The results from this process will allow you to first become more, then do more and live more of what you want in this life on earth. If you want to help yourself or others, you must first be powerful. You cannot help others from a place of weakness or disempowerment. These principles transcend, they are universal. These principles apply regardless of what culture or country you're from. These principles will work for you regardless of your religion, or your background, or education. These principles apply to every human on planet earth, period. The following principles are the pre-requisites for success. They are the basics and the foundation for which to build any success on.
So then, first let's talk about the most common ways people give away their power every day without even knowing its happening. The result of giving away power is a feeling of weakness or a lack of control over our life in general. A feeling of not being at cause, but rather at the effect of life. We find ourselves waiting for someone else or something else to change before we make a move. In short, we become stuck or "disempowered." The good news is that all of this can be turned around once you are aware that it is happening. So then, how do people dis-empower themselves and how do we correct these things? Let's begin the journey in chapter 2.
The top 12 most common ways people give their power away
1. Making excuses: What is an excuse anyway? Sometimes we don't realize we are making excuses. Here's the best definition I've heard. An excuse is simply any "explanation" of why you didn't get something done or why you can't be, do or have something. I'm too old, I'm too young, I'm black, I'm white, I'm female, I'm male, I'm not smart enough, I don't have the right education or the right parents or the right blood line, ect. Here's a common example of an excuse. Hey Bill, why are you late this morning? Well, my alarm didn't go off, I missed all the lights, I got stuck on the phone, I couldn't find parking, traffic, ect ect ect. Stop it! When you make an excuse, you are simply saying to the whole world, I cannot control myself and it's not my fault. An excuse says, I'm not responsible for my being here late this morning. Some of you may be saying, well those sounded like reasons why he was late. No, they are disempowering excuses. So, then what is the correct answer to "Hey Bill, why are you late this morning?" Answer: Because I didn't leave early enough and I became distracted. I will focus more on being on time in the future. That is the answer. In his answer, Bill is taking responsibility for being late and guess what, he will be respected for it and retain his power as well. You are either a person that makes excuses or you are not, be the later and the whole world will see you as powerful even if you "are" late.
When we take responsibility for our lives, we will make no excuses for anything. We are saying to the world, hey, I am Response "Able" I am accepting responsibility, I have the ability to respond. It has been my choices that have lead me to where I am, good or bad. When we truly believe that we create everything in our lives, that's when we stop "explaining" how outside circumstances and other people have caused our situation. We then also know that change is just a decision away.
How do I know if I am making an excuse or just explaining why I didn't get something done? What's the difference? Nothing! There is no difference. "Any" explanation of why we didn't get something done is just meant to diminish our responsibility to it. If you make excuses, you relinquish your control and everyone in your situation feels your loss of power.
Never feel the need to explain yourself, your friends don't need it and your enemies won't believe it. There is nothing to explain, do you get that? When we make an excuse for anything, it is like putting a hole in the bottom of our ship which allows water in and slows us down, the more excuses the more holes in our ship until there so much drag that we can't move. You simply cannot be powerful in your life and make excuses. It is a process, but until you take 100% responsibility for everything not 90% not 99% but 100% for everything in your life, there will always be holes in the bottom of your ship. Once you do take 100% responsibility, you will feel the power that comes with it.
You will never hear powerful people make an excuse about anything. Thinking an excuse is the same as saying an excuse to somebody, it is the wrong type of thinking. Just know that you are always at cause and you will never make excuses again. With that, let's try another example, this time with a less obvious excuse. Let's say you're on your way to work in the morning and you get a flat tire. It takes you one hour to fix the flat tire. When you get to work you are now one hour late. What then is the proper response to your manager "Bob" when you get to the office? Is it, "good morning Bob, sorry I'm late, I got a flat tire?" Now on the surface that may sound like a decent response but there's all kinds of things wrong with that response. First, it dis-empowers you to say, "I'm sorry" (your looking for sympathy). Second, your phrase also has an underlining assumption that the company will just have to suck up that hour that was missed, (after all, I got a flat tire and you should let that slide, its not my fault). That energetic communication has now cracked the trust in the relationship between your employer and you. So then, what is the correct response when you get to work an hour late after your flat tire situation?
Here is one: Good morning Bob, I had some car trouble this morning, so I'm going to stay an hour late tonight and catch up on anything I've missed this morning. That is being responsible, you didn't say "I'm sorry" because there is nothing to be sorry about. You aren't looking for sympathy, you are handling it, you're taking responsibility, and Bob sees that. You have retained your power and the trust from your employer. Your employer now knows that no matter what happens, they can trust you to get the job done, make sense? You stopped giving your power away.
2. Blaming other people or circumstances for your position or situation:
There is no faster way to give away our power, then to blame someone else or something else for our situation. To the degree that we believe outside influences control our life, we then have lost that much control of ourselves. If I believe that I can't be successful at something because of the Government or because I don't have the right education or because I'm a woman or because I'm too old or too young or black or white, than that belief makes that true for me. A belief is only a thought that we keep thinking, and it is that thinking that creates our situations and our circumstances. If I believe I can't get a raise at work because my manager doesn't like me, then that is true for me. I am energetically creating that for myself. The truth is nobody is doing anything to you. There are influences, but it is you're thinking, your attitude that brings you the circumstances you get. Others that are close to you, your family, a boss, friends, neighbors are all influences, there is no doubt. Only to the degree that you allow them to change "your" thinking will it be impactful to you. They cannot control your thinking however. Your thinking is always your own responsibility. There is never an excuse to blame anyone else for your thinking. When there is a temptation to blame someone or something, stop and think about what it is you want and focus on that. Begin to know that the current circumstances or situation will change to bring you what you want. The way to change something is to first "own" it. Taking ownership doesn't mean your taking blame. You take ownership so you can change it to what you want it to be, that is where your power lies. If you don't take responsibility or ownership, you can't change it. Someone may say, well I didn't create this mess so I'm not touching it. That's fine, just know that you will remain at effect and not at cause. That means you now have no power to change the situation to your favor. If you want to remain at cause over your life, then pick up the ball and throw it where you want it to go. You're not taking the blame for the thing, you are responding to it and putting your spin on it. You are adding your energy to it and turning it to your advantage. You have taken responsibility so you can remain powerful. To the degree that we blame other people or circumstances, we lose that much power to create what we want. Powerful people do not blame others for anything ever.
3. Complaining about anything:
Complaining is a common way people give away their power without even realizing it. When someone is complaining about another person or situation or anything at all, they are focusing on what they don't want or what they don't like. Since energy flows where your attention goes, the thing unwanted gets bigger. This is all at an energetic standpoint. The more you complain about something, the more energy you give the situation and thus it grows. Rather turn your back to the situation and think about what direction you now want to go. Take that energy and use it to decide what it is that you "do" want or what you do like. That may mean looking at the situation differently or deciding to go a whole new direction. Complaining takes you in the opposite direction of where you want to go, it wastes your time, it wastes your energy and annoys everyone else. Nobody likes a complainer except other complainers. There are things within your control and things that are not. If something is within your control to change, then change it. Complaining will do nothing to solve anything ever. For the things that are not in your control like a total global financial reset or a comet hitting the earth, complaining will do nothing. Any attention on those things at all, are a waste of your energy and diminishes your power. So there never is a reason to complain. Make a decision to never complain again and you will keep your power for the things that you want. Even Capt. Jack sparrow in the movie "Pirates of the Caribbean" had it right when he said, "The problem is not the problem, the problem is your attitude about the problem." Powerful people do not complain.
Excerpted from "How to Stop Giving Your Power Away"
Copyright © 2017 Kurt Winowich.
Excerpted by permission of Balboa Press.
All rights reserved. No part of this excerpt may be reproduced or reprinted without permission in writing from the publisher.
Excerpts are provided by Dial-A-Book Inc. solely for the personal use of visitors to this web site.
Table of Contents
Chapter 1 The Law of Attraction is not enough, 1,
Chapter 2 The top 12 most common ways people give their power away without even realizing it, 7,
Chapter 3 The 12 Principles of Power, 21,
Chapter 4 P = I x E, The human equation of power (your power formula), 43,
Chapter 5 The top ten phrases that powerful people avoid and your Power Dichotomies, 47,
Chapter 6 Releasing your abilities with the super, 60,
Chapter 7 Final Words, 153,